My hubby was working in a bad work environment and he finally quit! We have been having some issues lately and have been arguing more than often. He has told me that it's best for him to move out and leave. He said he's enough problems for me. I think he is just frustrated and needs some time to get settled down. What would you do about this situation? He says now that he's unemployed that I will be giving him more hell at home which I would not do! I told him I'd help out til he gets back on his feet after all that's what marriage is about through good or worse right? What do u suggest I can do?
2007-11-12 08:12:13 · 22 answers · asked by Txgirl23 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Well it's just what he mentioned I haven't heard him saying that he's getting his stuff out already. He's actually called me up and said if I need him to call him up on his cell. I personally think he's just going through a rough time and he need my support. I doubt there is another women.
2007-11-12 08:33:03 · update #1
Maybe he just said that to open the door to the conversation of how you will feel about him, now that he is unemployed. Keep reminding him how important he is to you whether rich or poor, that you love him unconditionally.
2007-11-12 08:43:17 · answer #1 · answered by CINDY J 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He wants to move out and leave, does that mean the end of your marriage or he just wants space? If he wants space it isn't necessary to move out there are other ways to get over his frustrations. That is being kind of selfish if he decides to leave because he is married to you. Financially it affects you both, he should consider working out any problems with you in hopes of overcoming this ordeal instead of trying to find a way out.
My husband quit his last job due to the bad work environment. Before doing so he asked my opinion and whether we know for sure if it was the best choice for us or not, I respect his decisions because I wouldn't want him to work in an environment where he is being treated badly, no one deserves that. It was a rough time for us considering it happened during the end of the year, but as a married couple we made the best of it and try our best to move forward to bigger and better things. Financial issues are one of the main factors in a failed marriage, it's how the couple work through their problems together that will make it long lasting.
2007-11-12 08:21:59 · answer #2 · answered by Flower 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First thing is hand him a suitcase or better yet, a trash bag.
He was wanting to leave if you haven't noticed.
A man thinking of his family and/or wife doesn't just quit a job. He discusses it and they agree together. Usually after he's updated his resume and started really looking for work.
Meanwhile, if you're working, keep right on. If not, get a job. The best revenge is to live well. Most women are capable of doing just that if they step up and take control of their life. And for heaven sakes do not take him back six months down the road.
2007-11-12 08:45:30 · answer #3 · answered by Been there 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My husband quit his job too. I'm reading a lot of stuff on understanding men. A man takes pride in his work. When he loses it, he feels like a failure. This is a very hard time for him. What he needs most from his wife is sympathy. For example, when he is feeling down you tell him something that shows him there's still hope i.e. "Poor dear,You may be discouraged now, but remember this is a dark hour that shall pass." Someone suggested ask him how he feels... never ask a man how he feels. Men hate that question, but you can ask what do you think. "Also, in the beginning don't offer your help and advice, this may be appreciated later. What he wants now is your sympathy, your appreciation for his efforts and your willingness to overlook his errors in judgment. "
2007-11-12 15:17:18 · answer #4 · answered by hope 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
There is a type of thinking called Black and White thinking. People who have that type of thinking tend to trow in the towel when one thing goes wrong -- if it isn't perfect, it is broken beyond all repair. Hence, it is either perfect or broken and not fixable.
The situation is either black or it is white.
Since he gave up on his job he feels a bit like a failure. Things aren't perfect so he is going to throw it all away!
You can try to reason with him, remind him of all of the things that are right or well in his world. You could remind him that making a decision about a relationship is never a good idea when you are upset about another issue.
You could try to talk him into seeking some type of counseling. I hope he gets it.
Wishing you well!
2007-11-12 08:29:49 · answer #5 · answered by susanmaried 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Like most men his pride is his job and being a provider for his family. Right now he is so stressed out over quitting his job, he is not thinking right. Both of you need to find a good marriage counselor and let them help you get through with this hard time in your life. There are lots of churches also who will help you deal with life's hard times and save your marriage.
2007-11-12 08:21:45 · answer #6 · answered by Rooster 1972 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
he's understanding how confusing it somewhat is to pay each thing on his very own now. i think which you need to artwork yet no longer through fact he's looking you too, yet through fact a woman won't be able to count on a guy. besides the undeniable fact that, he shouldn't anticipate you to prepare dinner and do each and all of the domicile artwork as quickly as you start up working. it somewhat is in my view that if a woman won't be able to count on a guy, a guy shouldn't count on a woman.
2016-10-02 05:20:18 · answer #7 · answered by saulsbery 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honey, when a husband moves out, the chances of him returning for anything other than x, is very unlikely. I think I recall seeing that 90+% separations of married couples end in divorce.
You can not force him to stay, he is an adult and is responsible for his actions.
You asked what you should do, I suggest you make plans as if he is going to live and not return. Close joint checking accounts and get his name off any loans you have if possible.
Also, get your name off any credit cards the two of you have together. Without a job, the financial crisis is going to come real quickly.
2007-11-12 08:23:50 · answer #8 · answered by Bambi C 2 · 3⤊ 1⤋
There's someone else.
What kind of man with a wife and/or family quits his job without first finding another one? Not responsible at all; he's a drama queen; and he's looking for a way out. He's practically begging you to kick him out and be angry with him. You're too naive to think that he's just going through a rough spot.
2007-11-12 08:28:26 · answer #9 · answered by ron-D 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋
communication is the key.
talk to eachother.
sounds like he may have just realy had it real rough at work,and when you have to spend all day in a rough enviroment with a lot of stress - it will show up at home and in our personality.
Is he depressed ?
if he is depressed maybe he should seek counceling.
marriage is for better or for worse - yes,but you also have to realise that men are not equiped like woman. they have a harder time dealing with things and its harder for them to express themselfs.
If he is dead set on leaving and having a seperation time,and talking doesnt help, im afraid there isnt anything you can do..
just talk to him and let him know how you feel.
Alot of guys feel they are supposed to be the person to bring home the bread and support the family - and if they cant do this they feel like they are a failure and feel like they are letting the family down.
2007-11-12 08:22:45 · answer #10 · answered by country_girl 5 · 0⤊ 2⤋