people who are lonely?

Question

What do you think when you see someone at school or work who is always by himself/herself and never has anyone to talk to? Always eats lunch by himself/herself, etc.

Would you go up to them and try to make friends? Would you continue your everday routine with your own friends and not think anything of it? Would you think that he or she was weird?

Be completely honest. There are a lot of lonely people in this world and not enough people who want to befriend them.

Answer 1

Well, this is indeed a fascinating question! Well done! I do not feel for one second that anyone who is by himself, and eats lunch by himself is weird. Absolutely not! Perhaps that person enjoys his own company!

There are times when we all need to be alone. You asked for complete honesty, so you'll get it! Smile at them if you wish, and leave it at that. A friendly smile says more than a thousand words ever can. Respect the fact that, for whatever reason, they prefer to be alone. Don't insult their intelligence by offering sympathy: this is the worst thing you can do.

There are times when I much prefer my own company. And why not, indeed? For my part, I live alone, eat alone, sleep alone and shall probably die alone! And - do you know something? I rather like it that way!

Answer 2

I am...I guess..a loner. I have a few close friends, and that is the way I prefer it.

If I am eating alone...there is a reason. Maybe I need some time to myself to think things out, or I'm just in a bad mood and want to be left by myself.

I do understand where you are coming from, though, and realize that there are lonely people in this world that don't want to be alone. In which case someone does need to go up and befriend them.

Answer 3

Unfortunately, it's very difficuly to approach loners without either compromising your existing reputation or exposing yourself to some trap the loner may be holding which the loner regards as a normal form of behavior. For some reason, loners are just associated with being weird since they don't appear to be willing to take the initiative, so taking any observable initiative with them is deemed as an unworthy gamble to say the least.

Still, this doesn't mean that loners are unapproachable, but to do so, you have to be confident and have some sort of safeguard to make sure you don't get exploited or looked down upon. Because of this, I find that the best way to befriend loners is to provide them with an opportunity to get active i.e. community service, charity, or some other way of just helping out. Loners are people just like everyone else and they deserve the benefit of the doubt for having benevolent intentions, but many loners are the way they are due to a lack of social complacency rather than social incompetence. If you invite a loner to hang out instead of HELPING out, there's a good shot he won't do anything to improve his own situation and will clutter the environment resulting in confusion and inefficiency of both physical resources and human capital.

Answer 4

No kidding. There is a site that has people sending in postcards anonymously with a secret they have never told anyone, and the most common thought is about loneliness.
My first reaction is to get very, very sad, and remember when I was one of those people,
What helped me was people who would acknowledge me with a simple hello and/or a smile. If someone just jumped in and stared "trying to make friends with me, it usually scared me- like I'd think they were just somehow making fun of me.
So, go slow, start with hello, something like that, then start in with casual conversation and go on from there.
And remember, there are people who isolate because they have a hidden agenda...but yes, most are just plain lonely

Answer 5

talk to them!
maybe they r shy!
its hard to make freinds if u dont know anyone . ask them to join u, make casual conversation with them.

you will never get to know the person if u dont talk to them.

when a person starts a new job or school - they see all these clicks of ready made friends and of course they feel alone - just go over and say hi!

Answer 6

i can speak from personal experience... i was the lonely kid, though i didn't want anyone to befriend me. the last two years of high school i cut myself off, coz i didn't want to part-take in what was taking place among most of my "friends." you'll find that loneliness comes from within, not without, and a lonely person will stop being lonely when they realize that they are sick with loneliness. though there are situations when someone does need a friend, and those are usually self evident, and i encourage anyone and everyone to do what they are led to do out of compassion, especially when you feel the most uncomfortable about it.

Answer 7

I feel sooo sorry for them. There was a boy in my school who just came and all he would do is look down at the floor. My friends and I all went to him and asked him why is he so alone? He told us that he doesnt like to hang with crowds. For some reason, we got him to hang with us and have a good time! ^_^

Answer 8

I met many good friends through the years by introducing myself. Sometimes people are shy or bashful and just need someone to break the ice.

Answer 9

I'm just that type of person that I would feel really bad for them and go and speak first. then the next day I probably would try sitting next to them.

Answer 10

Honestly, I find people who are shy and introverts personality. Its a lot more harder for them to make friends assuming they’re stuck up or snobs. Though, it takes time and effort to make or break a relationship.