Your thoughts on Monogamy...?

Question

Give me your thoughts on Monogamy...

Why you think it is good...

Why you think it is bad...

Personally I think as animals it is unnatural to be monogamous and goes some way to explaining why everyone is so unhappy.

What do you think?

**EDIT**

I'm liking the answers from Morningglory, jack W and Smtrodent.

Very well thought out.

Just as an aside 'I' am monogamous. I am happily married.

I would not be monogamous if my wife thought the same way I did and decided she wanted to not be.

I'm asking this from the standpoint that many of the people I know are unhappy and when they seek escape then it is often for sex...

Answer 1

good question. my opinion...?
animals do not experience emotions like anger and selfworth. they act only on survival instincts. which is why they are not monogamous. although some animals like the swan and penguin, which mate for life( to the extent that if their mate dies, they will stay alone for the duration of their lives) we were designed to have feelings like anger and distrust which is why we experience them when we are in what we thought was a monogamous relationship only to find out later that we are not. most of the problems that we have stem from us not being faithful to our mates. on that i do agree with you, but on the other hand if it were unnatural for us to be with one person and we were supposed to mate with many other people for procreation, then we would have adapted to or never been given the feelings that occur naturally as humans. make any sense?

Answer 2

I think either can be true, although whether something is 'natural' is a weak argument for an animal that eats packaged food, wears clothes, drives cars and uses a computer to communicate.

What is necessary to a good relationship is trust. My husband and I are not monogamous - he can have relationships with other women and I care not, so long as our own relationship doesn't suffer. However, if he broke trust, if he snuck off and slept with someone behind my back, or didn't use a condom, then he's out on his ear.

Since jealousy is a fairly normal part of the human psyche, it seems pretty normal to me that most people in a couple would not want to see the other partner sleeping with someone else. Since that reaction is common, monogamy is normal, and thus probably 'natural'. However, so is adultery 'natural'. I've come to the conclusion that some people are naturally monogamous and some aren't, just like some people like eating cheese and some don't.

I'm polyamorous - I don't mind sharing. However, it has to be equal. Monogamy is good, so is polyamoury, really whatever works for the couple concerned (and that should be their own business).
However, equality is important, so I think that either both partners should be free to sleep around, or neither should, and trust is important, so cheating is never okay.

Answer 3

You're forgetting that some animals are monogamous. I think it is a good thing for us humans. It should provide a stable relationship in which to bring up children, unfortunately a lot of marriages/partnerships fail because they are entered into and can be ended too easily. I see no bad side to it. in my experience most people who claim to believe it is a bad thing want an excuse to have a spouse/partner and still sleep around.

Answer 4

Opinions are like a-holes in that everybody has one and mine is no different. I find it funny however just how far some people will go in order to express beliefs to justify not being monogamous. Personally, I feel that during a loving marriage that monogamy is the only way to go and one of the reasons that my marriage is happy.

Answer 5

I really like the security of being in a monogamous relationship. I think everyone is unhappy because they aren't sexually compatible with their partners for whatever reason. Or they lose their relationship compatibility over time, and as they grow apart they also lose their sexual compatibility. But if you're happy and satisfied in bed with your partner, it makes it pretty easy to only wanna be with them; however, that IS hard to find. Someone that you will always love, and never want to share with anyone else what you share with only them.

Answer 6

Yes, as animals, we'd love to have sex with other partners. BUT we are much further along the evolution trail than most animals, so we have something they don't. It's called intelligence and the self control that goes along with that. We mate together in order to enhance the quality of our lives. It's another way of saying "we're in this together" or "it's us against the world", etc. etc. If you don't understand that concept, then you've never had the right person enter your life. Hope you can experience that someday.

Answer 7

It works better than any other system. It is protective of the wife and children. It is healthy, promiscuity is not. Promiscuous sex destroys relationships and leaves kids/women to live in poverty when the male moves on. People are unhappy because they are selfish. Anyone who wishes for unlimited sexual partners and access is just in it for him/herself.

Also, God set it up and If He thinks that's best, then so do I. He hasn't made any mistakes yet and He's gotten so much , so right! Until you can top God, just do it His way!

Answer 8

i think of for many individuals it would not exist. adult men cheat on different halves, females cheat on husbands, human beings divorce and remarry, some in no way wed and in basic terms play the sector. some mate for all times effectively yet they are uncommon, for many monogamy is a concept or an unrealistic objective.

Answer 9

There are several species of animals that are monogamous...and there are many people who remain monogamous...it is my opinion that some people use the excuse that we are animals and that we weren't meant to be monogamous.....in order to justify why they shouldn't remain faithful to one person...it is a choice to remain monogamous or not....

Answer 10

I like monogamy for a number of reasons - mainly because it's safer when you have unprotected sex.

I can't think of a reason why it's bad. Unless you have a bored partner - in which case maybe it's time to move on anyway.