How can a guy ignore his child for a woman?

Question

I will never understand how my 3 year old daughters father can ignore his beautiful daughter for months every year. He gives me no type of help a deadbeat basically sometimes I wonder if it is also because of the woman he has been with since my daughter was born she is 41 years old but acts immature at times and has shown insecurities so im sure she doesnt tell him to call his child and he definetly HATES me now because we have argued so much with each other. He is a piece of crap for ignoring his child point blank her birthday coming in 2 weeks and he still doesnt call or give any financial help or even acknowledge her at all it sickens me to the point I dont even want to take him to court and see his face. I gave him chances to be a father he doesnt love his child. How can he put a woman and everything else before his own daughter

Answer 1

Simply put, he's a dead beat in every sense of the word! Don't waste your time arguing and fighting a loosing battle. You are your daughters mom and right now that's the most important responsibility you have. Your daughter needs to know where she belongs, and that's with you.

Don't expect anything from the "dead beat." He isn't going to come through. Go on with your plans for your daughters birthday. What he does or doesn't do shouldn't interfere with your daughters "special day."

Some men are just not good father material. They don't want the responsibility's that go along with being a father. It's easy enough to create that child, but that's as far as it's going to go.

You're better off going it alone. You don't need another child (the father) to take care of. What you do need to do is take him to court so you can support your daughter. He's the father, it's his responsibility and obligation to help support his daughter whether he thinks it's fair or not. You already know he's not responsible, but that doesn't mean he should get out of paying child support. It's a little late now. He should have thought about that earlier.

The other woman he's seeing now has nothing to do with his obligations and welfare of his daughter. Don't even bother thinking in those terms It's not her .... IT'S HIM! His responsibility's fall on his shoulders, not anyone else's.

You can't continue to ignore the fact that he needs to pay his dues. You need that support to buy a new pair of shoes, clothing, food, medicine, for your daughter.

No one wants to look at a "dead beat," but child support over rides the fact that you are a single mom and have taken on the full responsibility to take care of your daughter.

If your daughter asks about "daddy" give her an extra hug and say we are together and that's what counts the most.

As far as court, you don't have to look at him. Hold your head up high and keep looking straight ahead. You don't even have to talk to him. The judge will be the one doing all the talking.

You have my support. Take care of that cute little daughter, because you sure aren't going to be the one to miss seeing her grow up. You're the one who will get the hugs and kisses.

Answer 2

His woman may be a bitc@ but in all fairness it is his responsibility to be a man and a father to his daughter...I was once told that the main reason why men can just walk away so easily (as statistics show) is because they think that they will have an obligation to the mother or not be able to please the mother and since they are done with you they just walk away from the kid too. It is so sad this is happening all over so much. If he does make an attempt don't interfere always making sure your daughter is safe of course. And what ever you do show up to court if he won't do it willingly then forcefully it will have to be.

Answer 3

Number one is because he is immature, other reasons include , out of site out of mind, she reminds him he failed at marriage and he truly doesn't have anything in common with a child, doesn't know she is able to be hurt this young, resents her for making him feel imperfect....the list has no end.........
Ms41 isn't helping the situation but she also is not causing the problem, he is. Most of my daughters birthdays and Christmas presents were actually initiated entirely by their step mothers, (yes he had two after me and ignored the children from them also)
As far as money is concerned that is a matter for the courts, they can and do get the childs support even if they have to take their income tax returns or garnish his wages. As for not wanting to see him your lawyer can do all the contact you just need to go thru your lawyer.
About your anger, it is not healthy for your child to know you dislike their father, you don't need to lie and make him a hero but never bad mouth him to her, she is a part of him genetically and she may start to doubt herself if you stay angry in front of her. As for visitation, your daughter might be better off if she didn't have to see him, if she goes for a weekend and is ignored or is made promises he doesn't keep it affects her self esteem. I have seen many children dragged literally to the other parent kicking and screaming no, no no.....visitation can and does hurt some children....

Back to Ms 41, you should never have contact with her if you don't care to, myself we have an exwives club and it is all ex's from the same bum....we have a lot in common, we loved a loser who treated us and our children like crap...

And how can he put someone before her, he put someone before you didn't he, well thats how, he loves himself first and I wouldn't even want to be his dog because he probably has no love there either.....

Answer 4

Because he is a selfish deadbeat. Take him to court anyway. Your child deserves support from her father. He is the one missing out and someday he will regret it. The woman should not tell him to call his child. He should just do it. Do not blame her. You do not know what he told her. He could have told her that you won't let him see her or various other things. It is up to him to keep in contact with her and no one else. She just might be better of with out him.

Answer 5

Some people will probably say that he will regret it some day. Truthfully, I doubt that he will. He is just the type that can move on, he doesn't have much of a heart or form connections that are too deep. I would still encourage you to seek financial support for your daughter, it is his legal responsibility. Do it for her. Don't try to force him to act like a father, she will benefit more if he is a absentee father.

Answer 6

well, a really shallow man definitely can. maybe he does not want to be as involved as you want him to be, and if he's not taking the chances you're giving him, then maybe just forget about even calling him. It will get harder as your daughter grows older, coz she's gonna constantly be asking- where's dad? I think you should just give him one last call, and tell him that this is the last time you're reminding him about meeting his daughter. If he still doesn't care, then maybe it's better without him in her life. When she asks, just tell her the truth. all the best.

Answer 7

He's just one of those selfish type of people. If he wants to see her, he has to help out (child support). I'm sure there is a man somewhere out there who can be a father to your daughter.

Answer 8

Some people don't want kids. There are lots of people who don't view them as positives - they are noisy, inconvenient, expensive, etc. It does not matter if they are cute. They are still annoying.
He is definitely going to put a woman who is going to have sex with him (fun) before spending time with a crying , clingy child.

Answer 9

I feel for your child. He's simply too selfish. Unfortunatelly, there's no way to make him be a good father to your daughter. I hope you can find a man who will fill in for him.

Answer 10

He's a man. They are so very different you can't hope to understand them. I'm sorry for you. Raise your daughter to be independent and not need men!