Neither one of us is having an affair. My desire is about 0. I want to have sex but it just seems that we just don't . We have been married about 18 years. 2 teen kids. I would be happy to have it now only because it has been so long. I think I would like to have it with other people but I would NEVER cheat. It is wrong.
2007-11-10 10:39:54 · 10 answers · asked by Shelly K 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I will give you an example of what our life is like. today, we had a tree cut down husband at work, had kids come out to help clean up debree of husband would not have to clean it up after he had been at work. He calls to tellsme he is on his way home and I tell him we threw the wood in a wooded area across the street and then he has the nerve to get upset we did it that way. told him this morning that if we didn't have sex soon I was going to find the next cut guy and have some fun. He just laughed like yea right. We are having painting done through the whole downstairs on monday. I have busted my rear end most of the day to get the furniture moved outdusted and brought old paint down from attic to have painters dispose of. The paint has been sitting there 2 days until I finally took it downstairs. Right now he is asleep on the couch.
2007-11-10 14:49:43 · update #1
I don't know what your situation is but I know it made me physically ill the last time with my husband! Probably close to three months ago! (My husband is physically and emotionally abusive)! Good luck to you hon! I wish I could offer you advice! Maybe just talking if you still love him , which I wonder about seeing you mention the possibility of desiring others! Bless you*
2007-11-10 16:05:22 · answer #1 · answered by Me 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Both of you are at fault for the sexless marriage. When you don't talk or confront an issue...what happens...it slowly builds under the surface and then boom....disaster. I am not saying no marriage but I am saying alot of ground work for something that could have been resolved when the cracks started showing. You have to show an intrest in one another and if you want to spice up the sex life...go on a date, rent a hotel, buy oils and give massages, play act, and afterward sitting on the bed in bathrobes and talk like college kids...have sex again too if the mood is right. Just talk with your husband and then DO make a plan...don't let 6 more months go by. Best of Luck. Love is there, now it is time to add Passion.
2007-11-10 10:46:30 · answer #2 · answered by Military Mama due 03/09 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
It's normal. Maybe you should see a marital counselor. Also, I know someone who went through what you are going through and she went to the doctor who said that her hormone were off or something ( happened long ago don't really remember the details sorry) one week of being on this medication and she found out she was pregnant at 43 the next month!!!! Also, find out from him why he has lost his desire, the best thing you two can do is talk. It could be something so small and easy to fix or something that might require help from a professional. Whatever it is --->find out! After 18 years of being together, it's worth discovering and conquering! And if it doesn't work, at least you can say that you gave it your all. No regrets, understand? Best of luck...
2007-11-10 10:51:11 · answer #3 · answered by Lana 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There are several things that can cause this situation. Money problems, job pressures, children, etc etc etc. And in addition to all that you have familiarity. Sex can become very routine and therefore no big thing. There is also the possibility of medical issues...which alows the mind to say yes even though the body says no. Start ruling things out and work on finding out if the other things are a problem. Good luck.
2007-11-10 10:55:31 · answer #4 · answered by westfield47130 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i think its lack of intimacy, romance.date once again..go for a meal, a movie, museum etc sometimes people take each other for granted and tend not to do the simpler most significant things , flowers,compliments etc! get the kids out of the house for the whole weekend if they live with and just have the whole house for yourselves!!you might as well initiate !NEVER cheat and dont think about it with other people...sometimes that can put u off!!happy sexing!!
2007-11-10 10:53:04 · answer #5 · answered by bravo 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't know honey but i am in the same boat your in and my wife's desire is at 0 and mine is 10000000000 and still counting I have had sex for about 9-10 months and sh#! come to think of it i have even seen my wife naked in while to....
2007-11-10 15:33:00 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well if you're 100 precent sure he isn't cheating, the next move would be to a doctor to rule out any physical cause; after that, a marriage counselor.
2007-11-10 10:46:15 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
I would ask him whats wrong with this marriage,with no sex. I think he is having sex,any way.
2007-11-10 10:52:06 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
so soon, i havent had sex in 2 years, how did u get so lucky
2007-11-10 10:46:27 · answer #9 · answered by charlesjerrell 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
you have teens, get them outta the house..and pretend your 20 again....you may not feel like sex..but once you get going.......enough said.
good luck
2007-11-10 10:44:24 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋