2007-11-09 21:20:07 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Social Science ➔ Gender Studies
Would you like a little more ground glass in your cheeseburger?
2007-11-09 21:26:06 · update #1
Portwine - your post makes no sense at all. Please look up the definition of passive-aggressive personality disorder (which is diagnosed in men an women with equal frequency). It was fairly recently removed as a diagnosis from the DSM-IV. The other kind of passive-aggression is NOT pathological - this just refers to behavioral tendencies which some scientists believe are adaptive, not maladaptive. Others think this class of behaviors falls somewhere in-between. Men are JUST as likely as women to be 'passive aggressive' - so you are barking up the wrong tree.
2007-11-10 08:05:30 · update #2
My mom's never been officially diagnosed with this, but I strongly suspect she fits the criteria. She has an absolute NEED to be seen as a "beloved saint" by all who know her...except by those whom she feels would suit her purposes better as scapegoats. She cannot admit to being wrong about anything- no matter how small the word or deed. It would tarnish her "saintly" image. Can't have that- heavens no. Better to divert attention away from her own shortcomings to someone else's- even if it means falsifying or fabricating these shortcomings- systematically destroying the person's reputation. Matters not. She will have convinced herself (and everyone around her) that the person deserved it. No thought given to the consequences that person will endure from her actions, as long as she comes out "smelling like a rose." Occasionally, (maybe twice in her entire life) has guilt seeped through to her conscious awaremess....and she was heavily under the influence of alcohol both times. Cried on my shoulder, she did...told me she was sorry- (I've been her favorite "scapegoat" my entire life.) But when the booze wore off- (heck by the very next morning) things were back to the same old thing. Apparently passive-aggressives have a wonderfully over-developed capacity for denial. Their lives depend on this. Without it, they would have to face the reality of their own making: and truthfully, this is probably more than they can bear. Woe is to those who have been "sacrificed offerings" and left in the wake of one who MUST be seen as always right, always just, and always pure of heart and intent.
2007-11-10 08:26:11 · answer #1 · answered by It's Ms. Fusion if you're Nasty! 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Very good point. Living in the midwest, passive-aggression is rampant. I believe it's the worst communication style of all the messed up communication styles. Many women have gone too far with making sure they're not submissive, and these same women still communicate indirectly, which is a form of passive-aggression. Within a good relationship, both sides are submissive to the other at times.
2007-11-09 22:33:56 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 1⤋
I have no idea why anyone who has a secure self image would want to have a "submissive partner". P/A personalities are fairly easy to identify. These are the folks who present the social image of being the altruist. Beneath that glycerin like exterior is, sometimes, deadly rage. Eventually, the rage leaks or blasts out. It can manifest as a seemingly innocent statement (usually gossip), that will do real damage to an others reputation for a while, covert physical abuse, innocent seeming verbal abuse. I steer clear of these angry folks. We all know some.
2007-11-09 22:33:56 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
I would hesitate to say that this is evident of submissive partners; they're more likely to just do as they're told and keep their thoughts and feelings locked up. I once read a dating book that seemed to encourage passive-aggressive behaviour. To paraphrase, if the guy you're dating isn't willing to drive 30 miles in the rain to come see you, say something like, "Oh, that's OK. I'm sure I can find something to do tonight without you," and he'll be there within 30 minutes or less. The book was called "Why Men Love Bitches."
2007-11-10 00:27:33 · answer #4 · answered by Rio Madeira 7 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Oh yes! This is a truism. Seemingly submissive and passive, but boiling deep inside. And gently and subtly releasing this anger, causing an aggressive act directed like an arrow to the person that is being attacked.
I have seen this in action. Of course, they deny it all. But the facts speak for themselves.
2007-11-09 22:18:43 · answer #5 · answered by Marguerite 7 · 3⤊ 1⤋
Passive agressive as in leaving the toilet seat up so I would have to visit the chiropractor the next day?
2007-11-10 02:20:16 · answer #6 · answered by Deirdre O 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes. Have you ever watched "Snapped"? One day, they just lose it. I prefer honesty to manipulation.
2007-11-10 06:25:06 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
because the worm always turns
2007-11-09 22:14:05 · answer #8 · answered by steve a 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋