Husband went out for a smoke 4 hours ago. He is actually drinking with his brother beside our house. I asked him for five weeks to stop this behavior-it makes me sad. I told him last week it was the last time I was going to say anything. Still alone...I can't help but be mad. Should I let this behavior go even though it makes me feel like I am crap? He certainly doesn't care.
2007-11-09 14:53:59 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I dont see the problem, his outside having a couple of drinks with his brother!!!
At least his home!
2007-11-09 14:58:44 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 5⤋
Well look at it this way...he only does what you allow him to do...so even though you expressed you don't like it, he feels as though you aren't going anywhere so he can continue doing this. You need to put your foot down and start showing him consequences other than an attitude or complaints.
Now I don't know the situation, but what's so bad about him going to his brothers house next door for a drink? Does he do this all the time or have a drinking problem or something?
2007-11-09 15:14:04 · answer #2 · answered by Truth Hurts 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It would appear that he does not consider what you feel, to be important. If this happens all the time then there is reason for concern but if it only happens say, once a week, then let it go. It's guy stuff, brother stuff and they need to do this in order to blow off. Women talk on the phone all the time and drive men crazy...well..in a way it's the same thing, only guys like to do it with a beer or two. Don't be mad...find something you like to do while they do that!
2007-11-09 15:12:43 · answer #3 · answered by Yner 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
He may feel uncomfortable having a smoke and drinks in his own home. You should talk to him and the two of you come to a compromise. Say twice a month he has his brother and a pal over for a drinks. and twice a month you have gal pals over. The key is you entertain your friends together as a couple and be supportive of the things that one another enjoy in life. So long as his drinking isn't causing any harm to himself or others. this shouldn't be a huge problem.
2007-11-09 17:26:59 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow, I thought I wrote this one!!! My husband does the same exact thing. And he has unfortunately for 9 years and it still pisses me off SO badly. I wish I knew how to deal with it, I am playful and deny him sex, I yell and scream and cry, I am serious and try and have a conversation about it. ALthough none of it works. I have tried telling him how offensive I find the smell and that he has to shower before coming to bed. Every now and then he feels guilty about leaving me inside alone, but that only lasts a few minutes and then he disappears. Some days I just try and let it go, others I feel enraged. I know I didn;t answer your question, but I thought it might help a little to know that you are not alone in this situation. Let me know if you figure something out that works. Good Luck!!!!!!!!
2007-11-09 15:00:01 · answer #5 · answered by Ca 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If you can see him when he is drinking and he isn't hurting you physically or anyone else then i don't see the problem. Now if he was going to the bars and physically hurting you then i can see you having a problem with it. Does he drink everyday and if so does he go out with his brother to the bars.That would be a problem and i could understand you being sad over that.
2007-11-09 15:59:59 · answer #6 · answered by Teenie 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Does he get abusive when he has a drink?? Why are u so sad? Cuz noones in the house w/ u?? Well either go outside w/ him and have a drink or call ur friends and go out..Can't be up ur spouses a** 24/7, everyone needs breathing room when people work the whole week they wanna let lose...It could be worse he could be out at the bar drinking and hittin on girls so be grateful!
2007-11-09 15:00:32 · answer #7 · answered by NONAME 4 · 1⤊ 2⤋
you have extreme anger issues.You observed a image on the information superhighway, so which you prefer to get in a combat? you need to examine to administration your anger till now it gets you into extreme hassle. You being mad became unjustified. Ofcourse she would desire to not love you, he merely broke up together with her a week in the previous. If something it style of feels that he rushed stepping right into a clean dating with you. with a bit of luck he's over her, yet merely time will tell.
2016-12-16 04:00:50 · answer #8 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Kill him! with kindness. Read this book " The Four Agreements" and you will learn how not to be a victim from other peoples actions. Socrate's and Plato is a good source of how people steal your freedom to choose how you want to feel simply because you see them watching you. Let your self shine , allows others to shine also. eh, what ever works , It better than thinking the opposite.
2007-11-09 15:29:48 · answer #9 · answered by keyofdeborah 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try to get his parents to help convince him to stop this behavior. You may even try to maybe come up with a compromise where he drinks not as often. You must look within your values and your marriage to see if this is the life you want to lead or stand your ground and walk. But talk to your hubby, get his parents involved, seek counseling together, and then when all has failed, ask yourself what your values are and then decide your future..good luck
2007-11-09 15:04:00 · answer #10 · answered by Noe F 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Does he do this every night? If this is habit, he definitely has a drinking problem and so does the brother. I don't know that I would want to live in such close proximity to any of my family or his.
2007-11-09 15:17:27 · answer #11 · answered by drewxjacobs 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋