Had an affair with my boss..it is over now. I live in LosAngeles,CA and was offered a job with a competitor who is willing to pay me $500 more a month to move to Houston,TX. All of my family is here in Cali..but people found out about the affair. I am not sure what to do; a part of me says go to start over with a clean slate. The other part of me says stay cause of the fear of starting all over.
2007-11-09 03:59:20 · 12 answers · asked by R 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
If I were you, I would move. Not because the affair, but cost of living is a lot cheaper in TX, so it's not just an extra $500 you'll have. It wouldn't hurt to try it out and see how you like it. If it doesn't work out, you can always move back home and by the time you move home, all the rumor mills will have settled.
2007-11-09 04:05:26 · answer #1 · answered by PhantomRN 6 · 4⤊ 0⤋
Don't be scared to leave to take that job in Houston.
TX is close enough to Cali. Its not like you have to travel across the country. Seriously, people do it all the time. And as for the affair with you boss-do you think you will be comfortable working in a place with everyone knowing about the affair? Would it be productive to you?
Starting with a clean slate is not a bad idea/
2007-11-09 12:05:44 · answer #2 · answered by moon&stars 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
That's a $6,000.00 raise, doesn't sound like much when you have to move from one state to another.
Are they going to pay for your move? If not, I'd try and negotiate that part into the deal.
There is nothing wrong with making a fresh start.
And who cares what other people think unless it's keeping you from getting a job>
One more thing.....don't have any more affairs ok?
If you could get this new company to pay your moving expenses would you sway that way more?
After taxes being taken out on $500.00 per month, is not that much more money, but it is a job.
Who have to sit down and weigh out the pros and cons. of each situation.
You need to make a few calls and have a few companies come out and provide you w/ some estimates on your costs to move too. so you don't find yourself out of state away from your family struggling financially because of the costs of the move and housing in TX.
Do your research and then take a look at how you feel about each sitiuation before you make up your mind.
good luck to you ~ No more affairs !!
2007-11-09 12:11:12 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't want to sound harsh. But you made your bed, now u have to lye in it. So u had an affair. Ok. What r u ganna do if u have an affair in Texas. Move to Florida. Its not easy to move hundreds of miles away from your family and friends. Especially just for a few hundred dollars. If it was a secure job that was going to offer long term security, than maybe. But it sounds more like you just want to escape the gossip that is revolving around u. Don't go. With time the gossip will fade. Besides Texas is sweltering in the summer.
2007-11-09 12:08:44 · answer #4 · answered by What What 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
$500 is not that much more a month to transplant yourself away from your support network. Although you might consider trying to find another job in Ca. since the news of your affair leaked. I have found that running away from a problem usually only makes it worse. Even though we would all like a clean slate. Good luck!
2007-11-09 12:09:32 · answer #5 · answered by adult_passions 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sometimos is better if u finish a relatioship to move on, pherhaps there'll be another chance to get a better job. Instead of moving to Houston, eventualy you'll find another job in Cali, because of your family. My advice is try to stay away from the person that u had the affair, cause as close you are togheter it may be possible that i happens again. Good luck.
2007-11-11 14:15:31 · answer #6 · answered by Kenneth 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Go with a clean slate. If people at your job know about the affair, it might not take long for jealous coworkers to start using that as a basis for ruining you professionally. If you leave, anything they say is just idle gossip that can't hurt you, 500 miles away.
2007-11-09 12:05:38 · answer #7 · answered by boots6 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
If the new offer is a better opportunity (that does not mean just more money, but advancement opportunities, responsibilitie, and so on), then this is a no brainer, go. If you feaal your current job is better for you, then you really have to think it through. Will you really be treated fairly after what you did? Don't forget to compare cost of living between CA and TX!!
2007-11-09 12:11:32 · answer #8 · answered by marystoy_2000 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well if you stay, you'll have to prove to your family that you have remorse and a good character, you'll have to earn their trust again. That's a hard road, but probably the right one. If you go, sure you'll get a clean slate, but that would be running away and 'pretending' that you didn't make poor choices, so I guess it all boils down to what kind of person are you?
2007-11-09 12:07:18 · answer #9 · answered by reddevilbloodymary 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not worth it. 500 bucks? Maybe for a thousand bucks. Go find a new job in the same city. Real friends will stay with you, fake ones will move on.
2007-11-09 12:46:03 · answer #10 · answered by C>/ 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋