I am 43, recently married, no children or dependents. I am redrafting a will and since I have only been married a short time most of my $$$ and property will be go to my parents.
The longer I am married, or should we have a child then most of my assets will go to my wife. My wife has been all over me lately about planning for "her" retirement or a career change where she probably would make less money. I love what I do and make multiple six figures annually. Part of her retirement plan is bugging me about my WILL. She wants to see it. I am hesitant to show it to her or let her influence my redrafting. We have been married for 4 months. Any thoughts?
2007-11-09 02:31:27 · 13 answers · asked by Kyle V 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
The reality is, she is your wife now. As your wife, she should be entitled to see your Will. It's not legally required that she see your Will, but morally you are married and as her husband you should let her in on your planning because it does affect her and her future. You are husband and wife now - not boyfriend and girlfriend.
BUT it sounds like she is so focused on money!
Listen, no matter what your will says - she will automatically be entitled to a bunch of your estate because you are married. This is called a spousal share of the estate. Legally, you can't cut your wife out of your will. Check your state laws to see how much she is automatically entitled to.
What you should have done was have her sign a prenup.
If I were you, I would divorce her asap and then have her sign a prenup if she wants to get remarried. You could easily be slapped with huge alimony payments, etc. if you stay married for too long.
It that is not an option then a postnuptial agreement is.
2007-11-09 02:44:39 · answer #1 · answered by Dina K 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I'm not sure I can appreciate your approach. Since you married with the expectation of being together until death do you part, you're incremental approach to this doesn't make sense to me. If you died tomorrow, certainly not wishing it on you, do you really feel that you have left to her appropriately? Also, when you marry there is no more my money and their money. It becomes "our money". That's you're business, not mine.
Let her see it and understand your rational. Especially since you've taken this incremental approach to her portion of the estate (although I suspect the law has something to say on this). She'll need to plan much more assertively for her retirement in case you pass in the foreseeable future. She has a right to know what your plans are for your portion of the "our money".
Ideally, as a married couple, you should be planning this together.
2007-11-09 02:49:18 · answer #2 · answered by JB 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Her retirement plans involve you. It is kind of strange that you two are married but doing all of your planning separately. Your retirement should be planned together and the wills should be planned together. If you cannot do that then that is a sign of a marriage that has some issues.
2007-11-09 02:44:01 · answer #3 · answered by A.Mercer 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My only thought is it sounds as if you don't trust your wife and you feel as if she is taking advantage of you financially. I understand that you have only been married for four months but where is the trust? You should have had her sign a prenup.
2007-11-09 03:00:01 · answer #4 · answered by Nikki 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think you are doing the right thing as you have been married such a short time, i also agree with your plan to inlude your wife as the marriage goes on. Have you explained this to your wife? If no then i would suggest showing her the will and explaining it to her. It sounds very fair and if she get's angry about it then it shows where her priorities lie.
2007-11-09 02:38:38 · answer #5 · answered by Purdycat 5 · 1⤊ 2⤋
well you married her, so she means something to you and you dont feel she is entitled to anything if anything should happend to you. what happens if you, god forbit, die tomorrow, everything goes to your parents then what. what happens if god forbid they die shortly after, your WIFE is left with nothing. Do you feel she only married you for your money, if so im sure you knew that before the marriage. Whey does everything, especially a marriage, always end up about money. Can it not be just for love anymore, geez.
2007-11-09 02:37:36 · answer #6 · answered by louie 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
You married a gold digger. Sorry Charlie...
2007-11-09 05:11:38 · answer #7 · answered by C>/ 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would think that the two of you should draft a will, together.
You married her, right?
In the event of your death, everything goes to her. In event of her death, everything goes to you. You may want to leave some money to your folks should they survive you.
I hate to say that you will survivie your parents.
2007-11-09 02:39:42 · answer #8 · answered by Steve B 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I wouldn't recommend it, she wants to know what's she's getting and if your giving most of it to your parents it could cause problems between you, but you doing the right thing, if you haven't been married that long then don't give her too much yet.
2007-11-09 02:37:42 · answer #9 · answered by Diego 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋
You do not create a WILL now, you see her activities at least for five years and then create. If at all you create a WILL you need not show it to her.
2007-11-09 02:38:21 · answer #10 · answered by Raghavendra R 5 · 0⤊ 3⤋