Pregnancy: Feel my husband resents me at the moment?

Question

I had a very bad work situation and my husband supported me in giving my notice. Im not due until January 1st, but when everything was occuring he did not have an issue with me quitting my job.


Ever since I my last day of work I feel like he resents me. Hes treating me badly and is not acting like himself. The train of communication is not working and I am trying to avoid confrontation. I figure if we can have a good night and he is able to cheer up he might share whatever problems hes having at the moment.


What can I do??

Answer 1

He is likely feeling pressure that he is the sole breadwinner in the family right now and with the new baby arriving soon it is probably making him nervous about being able to support everyone. You are wise to avoid confrontation. Wait for a nice relaxing evening and initiate a conversation about this. He sounds like he is normally a very supportive person, so my guess is he is just feeling stressed out about the future.

Answer 2

I asked a similar question about 3 months ago when i was still pregnant because I had gained about 40 after my eight month and was freaking out! This was my third (the first i gained 14 pounds, the second 20) So, when i hit the 40 mark i couldn't believe it. My ankles were HUGE, and it didn't help that everyone else even told me i was huge (even strangers) I wouldn't worry about it. Don't try to lose weight now. Just get enough water, lots of water, keep an eye on the meals and treats, and just know that it will come off! My daughter is 6 weeks old tomorrow, and i have 6 more pounds to go and will be back to my prepreg weight. Oh, and my ankles came back after two or three days! Don't freak!!! Just remember everyone's body is different, and right now everything is chaos! Good luck and congrats!

Answer 3

I was sick and couldn't work when I was pregnant and was completely oblivious to the fact that he resented me not working.

My son was 5 months old when he finally lost it and let it out. He basically felt guilty that I had to give up my job (that I loved) for a baby we didn't plan and he resented any money that was spent. It was his problem that we worked out together.

You need to talk about this fast, you don't want any worries when you are having this baby.

Tell him how you feel when you have the courage but make it soon to stop the stress.

He may not even care about you not working, he may be stressed about work and not want to dump on you because you are pregnant, he may just be very worried about the whole process.

You can't make assumptions because unless you ask a direct question you really don't know. My husband and I are very, very close and when ever we make assumptions we are usually very wrong.

Get this out in the open so that you both can deal with it.

Good luck!

Answer 4

Know that you are not alone. I quit my job so we could move for my husbands job. Once we moved, I found out that I was pregnant and I am having trouble getting a new job. My husband yells at me about bills, balmes me and acts so ugly. It is getting better but I never know when he will flip out. I wish I could tell you what to do, but I don't know either. I am struggling with low self worth these days and can't believe this is happening to me. I was a well respected, loved, published, etc....now, I am afraid my children will not have Christmas and I wonder how I will afford a baby bed. I feel like such a bad person, though I thought I was doing what was right at the time. Anyway, Hang in there!

Answer 5

Try and understand his situation. Imagine the huge responsibility that is on his shoulders and his shoulders alone now! How would you feel if you had to go off to work every single day while he sat at home? If I were you, I'd make sure he knows how much I appreciate the sacrifices he's making for me and his baby. I'd go overboard in being frugle with expenses, treating him like the great guy he is, and having a home that he can't wait to come back to each and every day. If that doesn't work - then you're going to have to find out what's really going on.

Answer 6

He just had a ton of responsibility put on him.. new baby coming, becoming the sole provider.. etc. , plus, it's an emotional time for a guy, too..

We guys have a tough exterior, but we can be squishy inside... like a warm M & M. if you squeeze an M & M hard enough, it will break..

This is a tough time for both of you.. give him a break.. things will work out.

Answer 7

It is a lot of responsibility to keep in. He feels a lot of pressure that you now don't have a job and a baby is coming. Just let him think it out. Don't pry him for information. You do what you have to do for you. He will work it on on his own. Good luck

Answer 8

A man's responsibility is to care for his family. If he is a real man, he will accept this and do anything he has to do to care for you and the baby. You have to talk to him. marriage doesn't last long when a husband and wife cant talk.
you've got to be gentle. but firm. He's probally feeling a bit overwhelmed, especiallly if it's your first. but if he's a real man, he will rise to the challange. but might need some help doing it.

Answer 9

You "must" open those lines of communication back up. It's crucial. Just sit down and talk with him...tell him how "you" feel and that you want him to be honest.
Final note: maybe he feels like you do....the only way to settle this is to talk. I'm sure it's all going to be ok.
G'luck
Congrats to you both

Answer 10

there is nothing you can do but talk to him.. unfortunately.. maybe he is feeling more pressure ot make sure the household is taken care of.. it doesnt mean that he resents you or that he loves you any less, he is just pre occupied with maintaining a home for your child to come to... I woul dbe as understanding as possible, and be there when he is ready to talk, whether it is today tomorrow or next year.