I have been wanting to live in USA or Australia. My husband have the chance to apply for a position in Australia but he cannot bear to part with his family. I can understand because he has really great family and I love them too.
My life here is not really unhappy, just that maybe I don't feel like working. My current work gives me a good income, but I don't have passion in my work anymore but I can only stop work if we go overseas when his income is able to cover mine.
Of course not only because of this that I want to leave. I am just tired of living here, and also tired of everything around, except for our family. I don't want him to leave with me since its not what he wants, so I need to do something to be happy here. What should I do? I really don't know what I am living for now. There seem to be no goal, nothing that I am aiming for except looking forward to have a baby. If anyone have experience this, what did you do to make yourself happy? (I need the income from my job.)
2007-11-08 18:21:01 · 9 answers · asked by Ferris Wheel 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Maybe spend a couple a couple of weeks living in a South American slum, or maybe in a shanty town in the Philippines. I never appreciated what I had in life until I saw places like these. Now I don't moan no more. Just a thought.
2007-11-08 18:42:26 · answer #1 · answered by ketkonen 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Hello. It sounds like you are really in a bind, emotionally I mean! It is so hard when finances and family are the factors, because one will always out weigh the other! (not always family first!!)
It can be hard especially when you are the one feeling unhappy with the situation. I KNOW! Been there, was the bread-winner, and felt STUCK!
You have done the right thing by talking about it here at least. It is the first part of easing your inner turmoil. You have it out, & in front of you, and ppl will respond with ideas, sympathy, empathy & a possible solution!
Second, I really believe that you should sit with your husband when you are both relaxed, comfortable (not hungry, or tired or upset about other things) and alone with time to talk with out interruptions.
Tell him how you feel about things, your job, the town and most importantly how much you too, love the families.
A lot of us (human beings, that is) forget that we are not mind readers! and wait for the other to catch on to things and in the mean time we are miserable, and building resentment. Making ourselves even more unhappy.
So think about what you want to say, make a plan write notes if it will help. Always go forward with a plan so that you will get the best results from taking such a big step!
Be as honest, and say exactly what you mean so that he doesn't have to guess at things, and you will avoid drama, doubt and you will feel better after it is all said.
Then the two of you can start to find a solution TOGETHER! I'll bet he has similar feelings to what you are going through and just doesn't know how to express it. And by taking the first step, showing your vulnerabilities will make it easier for him, since men have a harder time taking the first step, if feelings are involved or if they feel that they are not living up to their ideas of 'manhood'.
You know, maybe something like a vacation is in order since you don't have children. Can you get away for a bit? So you two can really talk things through and not in bits and pieces? It may be something to think about! (fun too)
Good Luck Sweetie. I hope that I was at least a bit helpful here!
PS
If you do come to the USA what part of the country are you thinking of?
2007-11-08 18:53:29 · answer #2 · answered by Tonia M 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
THATS a contradiction....cause if you really would think about your good life you wont feel unhappy right.......I quess it all depends on your age and living-conditions.....if you dont have kids yet so what is stopping you from NOT trying to go and find some work in usa or australia....just for 1 year or so...see if this can make you happy......personally I quess you are bored with your relationship,job and home/country so get some fresh,NEW air but dont forget LIFE will be life and there are ups and downs and different flows and emotions without any particular reason.Im heading 40,got a beautiful girl,have a nice job which I truly like and im living and working abroad for last 15 years but hey lately im wondering if im really happy and if my best is yet to come but really its useless....just be grateful for life when you are young and healthy you could get cancer and face dying like my good friend so live it up and enjoy as much as possible and NO grass aint greener on the other side of the earth......
2007-11-08 18:32:57 · answer #3 · answered by ajal 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I know how u must be feeling because i too wud want to move abroad after marriage. my fiance thinks thats not such a good idea but i wud like to live somewhere else.. i hope you find something useful to do here and enjoy urself.. but i understand how you feel and u r not wrong in wanting this.
2007-11-08 18:29:24 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Happiness or not, depends upon you and you only ,on how you react to a given situation.If you are prepared to do some sacrifices for the people around you ,you can be happy always.
2007-11-08 18:30:47 · answer #5 · answered by pavamana 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it style of seems such as you reside in a small city or community you want to flow in another country with your husband yet he wont flow away his mom and dad to flow in another country your life is sturdy yet you experience something lacking thats very sturdy yet talk talk with ur husband tell him u elect to flow in another country u love his mom and dad like him yet its time to flow u dont experience happy if he loves u hell flow in another country taking u with him yet whilst he doesnt elect to flow away his mom and dad even after marriage to flow in another country for a greater suitable life sorry yet hes not likely to alter i talk from own journey my mom and dad have been in another country my father got here right down to be together with his mom and dad who used emotional blackmail collectively as my better half left in another country to be faraway from this small community city because he had the comparable concern as u.s. ive considered the two factors of the coin
2016-09-28 21:24:50 · answer #6 · answered by pellish 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you just want a change.... i went through the same thing with my move. it's nice to be away from things you see everyday to experience newer things... that's how you grow.
2007-11-08 18:24:42 · answer #7 · answered by yes, you have a problem. 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no matter where you are, the grass is always greener on the other side. but there's no harm in trying what's in there. remember, hesitation is devastation!
2007-11-08 18:29:46 · answer #8 · answered by le sabre 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
learn more in religion.
every human has a purpose in life.
2007-11-08 18:25:13 · answer #9 · answered by Ammar S 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋