Do ugly people need to realize they are ugly and come to terms with it?

Question

Perhaps this question is misunderstood.

Does not self esteem come from realizing one self; not by lying to the mirror?

Answer 1

I get what you are saying.
I would not say I am ugly but I am no prize either.
I was born with a large port wine birthmark on the left side of my neck and up until a few months ago I had a drifting eye.
I realized at a young age that first impressions were key and with my looks people may look at me and think I am less of a person.
So I decided to work on other areas. I study a lot and I have good verbal and listening skills. I worked on something that would overpower my less than perfect looks.
LOL I know I won't ever win a beauty contest but I have a great many people come to me for advice both at work and in my personal life.
So to answer your question...the answer is yes. People need to be realistic with themselves. Some people make it on looks, if you can not do that then you better have a backup plan.

Answer 2

Given that beauty is really in the eye of the beholder I'm not sure there's really an answer to this question.

Barring people with some kind of skeletal deformity, what we call ugliness is more a matter of bad decisions about, say, a haircut. Someone may have picked glasses that make a certain feature seem more prominent.

Some people just prefer different things. I like skinny guys. My cousin is newly married, his wife thinks he's the hottest guy ever to breathe, and he's a stocky guy. Your definition of ugly may be someone's definition of a headturner.

Also, the desirability of traits depends largely on culture. A skinny, sleek kind of guy probably wouldn't be considered anything too great in a place where guys are supposed to be beefy and muscular.

If you're okay with the way you look, you're going to find someone who likes it.

I think you don't have much confidence if you feel compelled to ask a question like this.

Answer 3

It really depends on what kind of ugliness we are talking about. If it is cosmetic, there s a lot we can do about it. But it is healthy to come to terms with the fact that we might not be happy the way we look but we are still people.

If uglinesss is a behavior then we need to realize we are ugly and start to be more beautiful.

Answer 4

Do you need to come to terms with who YOU are. By calling anyone ugly, it means that you yourself have low self esteem about yourself. There are many, many people who do not come up to the standards of models and magazine covers, who are beautiful, you know why. Because they would never think of asking a question like that and because they are positive, caring indivuals, which make them beautiful, from the inside out. I feel you need to come to terms with whatever is going on in your head, because something is not right there.

Answer 5

"Ugly" is an assessment that is made based upon opinion. Opinions vary from person to person.

The process of by which society as a whole determines what is and is not ugly is quite arbitrary and changes depending upon the time and culture. Many things play into gauging "ugly," including some things that might seem irrelevant, such as politics, economy and business models.

In short, "ugly" is difficult to predict and highly variable.


"Coming to terms" with something is an entirely individual process. Nobody can make anyone come to terms with something. Just because a lot of people speculate on what someone *should* come to terms with, doesn't mean that it's true or that the person will be capable of coming to terms just because everyone told them to do so.

This question brings up more questions than answers, in my mind:


In this question, whose standards of "ugly" are we applying? To whose benefit will it be if the presumed "ugly" person comes to terms with his/her own ugliness? Is it non-ugly people who are asking the ugly people to realize that they're ugly in the eyes of the non-ugly people? Or in their own eyes?

Isn't it cruel to create an arbitrary standard of beauty, impose that standard of beauty upon people who do not fit it, and then require that those people dwell upon the fact that they do not fit into the arbitrary beauty scheme until they eventually sink down into the resignation that they are not, nor will they ever be, welcomed and accepted by "the beautiful people" as anything other than not-beautiful?

Would it not just be infinitely better to allow people to accept themselves in whatever fashion allows them to feel good and be productive in the world?

Answer 6

Considering this is the second question you have asked regarding this topic, I wonder if you consider yourself to be ugly and struggling to come to terms.

If its simply a means to ask a question and pick a best answer to gain points, then I feel sorry for you. There are many other topics to choose from without potentially causing pain for someone else.

I agree 100% with Maureen's response!!

Answer 7

Well, i think even the people that we consider the most beautiful in the world, are not happy with their looks! I just believe that the older you get, the more you realize it's not all about the looks, but being comfortable with yourself. And when you're comfortable with the way you are, it makes you attractive in other peoples eyes.

Answer 8

i'm able to sympathize with the melancholy and loneliness you experience. The caste gadget? Hmmm... i won't, regardless of if; sympathize with the identify of this diatribe. you're a grasp's point candidate. you're in AmeriKKKa. You escaped the poverty and grime of India (in case you ever somewhat experienced it) you're matriculating, whilst others artwork, pay taxes, and desire they'd locate the money for a stronger guidance. you're fortunate. with reference on your speech impediment: look for help on the college. if your mom and father won't pay for it (yet another fortunate difficulty: you rather have 2 mom and father while many that desire to be on your place have been "raised" with the aid of a single drug addicted mom or worse) look for extra independence -- in case you acquire this a procedures, you're able to do it. with reference on your dark dermis, do you have faith interior the caste gadget? if so, pass lower back to India and supply somebody else your spot on the college. in any different case, if the ideals of the caste gadget are bringing you down, exchange into an AmeriKKKan citizen and break away those ignorant ideals. It isn't ordinary, yet once you open your ideas, you would be able to locate there are people who have faith in you and what you're able to do, regardless of your dark dermis. no count what, you're Asian and a minimum of your race isn't one that is stereotyped in a unfavorable way.

Answer 9

I don't really care to answer this question but I wanted to tell KITKAT, you are beautiful.

In regards to the question, I think someone's inner beauty or inner ugliness really begins to shape how the person looks, the longer you know them. We need to appreciate our body for what we have. If other people don't like it, then the hell with them.

Answer 10

Only if the ugliness stems from the personality.