A poem for no particular reason.. comments welcome.?

Question

The winds have blown,
the dust is risen,
i continue to walk on.
My surrondings stir,
I follow my heart,
and onward goes my path.
It twist and turns,
it drops off and restarts,
where it leads i have no idea.
i want to give up,
I have no more drive,
that has kept me going all this time.
I begin to cry,
and i fall to my knees,
i just can not follow this path.
Its led me through all my darkest times,
but it continues to bring me more.
It started out bad,
and just got worse,
but somehow ive just kept walking.
Not knowing where to go,
not knowing who to trust,
I wonder who is on my side.
My friends just stare,
then they look away,
almost as if they had just condemed me.
Is this how my life should really be?
with no where left to turn.
If you know an answer,
to this question i face,
Than for God's sake tell me now.
Or else i fear i've lost all hope,
and my path will surely end.

.. btw: I'm not thinking suicidly right now.. this poem just came to my mind..

..i think i wrote it from past hardships.. idk.

hmmm.. i do see what you mean Dondi! thank you.. xoxo

Answer 1

I think I like it. That path of possibly sure destruction, following it gets worse, but going a different may be as bad, or worse. A terrible dilemma to be sure.

Answer 2

Nice poem! Very deep and emotional. Also just like the other person said you should organize the poem in quatrains, or something similar.

Also after polishing and perfecting it, you could always enter it into a contest to see how well you have really done it!

Answer 3

I like this poem. It is very deep. I think that everyone goes through these times and feels this way at some point in their journey. No matter which path they may choose. Just stick in there and it will get better eventually.

Answer 4

wonderful. some people think admitting to being in pain is a sign of weakness. i don't. pain is very real to all of us though none of us like it. it is proof that you are still alive. still here. still fighting. numbness is more a sign of trouble than pain. but pain is NEVER permanent and was never meant to be. it makes us appreciate good things and great people even more. its just a part of living. expression of it is often healthy and therapeutic especially if you can do it creatively which you have done quite well. keep writing. it helps people who don't know how to put it into words feel not so alone in the world:)

Answer 5

I like it, you should polish it up and enter it in a contest. The best poetry come from life experience and the unique way each person views or feels different stimuli. Good Job

Answer 6

Very deep poem. Got a lot of pain in it, from when you are going through hardships and feel like giving up.

Answer 7

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Answer 8

I like poetry for no particular reason. May have something to do with being blond. I liked it, keep it coming, I enjoyed this one tremendously.

Answer 9

i like it but you should seperate them into quatrains. then they would look more professional and make better sence to people who look at the structure of the poem. lots of emotion in it.

Answer 10

sounds like me, sometimes...thanks for sharing!