when is a good age for a single mom of a 2yr old to get married?

Question

where do you even start to find a good man to settle down with i am only 21 and i dont want an old man?

Answer 1

Since you are very young and your age reflects your question I would not worry about it. You have plenty of time! Concentrate on your relationship with your child. The right man will come along eventually and you really need maturity to see the good ones as when your young you tend to head for the naughty one. A person needs to be your best friend first especially when you have a child in the equation!

Answer 2

Good luck. Most guys aren't much interested in raising another man's child. The worst of all possible worlds is to be a single mom, if you are seeking a committed marriage. Lots of women fall into the trap of getting preggers again, to try to trap a guy. He's around for about 3 years, and gone, and now you have two that you cannot raise.

You goofed, hon, by producing a child out of a loving marriage. In your place, I'd for sure not be hunting for some guy to support me and my child. And just in case, get on the bc pill.

Here's what my mom hammered into my head beginning at age 13. See if you can get your life back on track:

1. The most important decision you will ever make is who you marry. Choose with your head as well as your heart.
2. Have no children until your bond is strong, and have no more than you yourself can support. You may just have to!!!!!
3. At any and all costs finish your education to qualify for those high paying jobs. It is likely that you will work sometime during your marriage, probably for decades…. Get paid for it. And remember, your kids and your education are forever…. Husbands, lovers and promises are not!!
4. Have a stash of cash no one knows about even if you are sure you will never need it. You absolutely will, and the more the better.

You're down two sweetie. Get back in school. That's where the quality guys are... and refrain from producing another child. Your odds drop drastically the more children you have out of marriage. Every kid deserves to be planned for, and have parents with resources to give that child the things that will allow that kid to become all he/she can be.....

Answer 3

I was a single mom from the time my oldest was 4 months old. Her father was abusive and I decided to get out while I could so I know where you are coming from. It's hard to know when the right time is. Your child is at a very impressionable age and will be resilient to any changes that happen.

You have to be ready. I am not sure what happened between you and the father but you have to feel it's right. Start out slow. Go out on dates (if possible), etc. prior to bringing anyone close to the child.

My oldest was 8 years old when I started dating my "now" husband. It's harder when they are older, believe me, because they don't understand why they don't have you all to themselves anymore.

It's ultimately your decision. Just be careful. And have fun.

Answer 4

She already a single mom. All she needs to worry about is taking of herself & her 2 yr old raising it. No man should even matter not even marriage. At 21 yrs old she needs alot of growing up to do, on being mature, strong, independent, & financially secure & planning her own life with her child future. When she's established herself well & has her life in order then the right man will come along.

Answer 5

Wow....it's hard to find a "good man" even without having a child.

It doesn't matter how old the child is before you marry...the idea is that the man you marry loves you AND the child...not just you.

I met my husband at a restaurant where I worked. I don't recommend meeting men in bars (because they fake it) You can join dating sites to meet people...but check them out carefully before meeting them....and wait until it's pretty serious before you introduce them to your child.

The worst thing you can do is parade a whole bunch of men in & out of your child's life. They will grow up insecure and thinking that leaving is a way of life.

And don't think that you have to "settle" for a specific type of man either just because you have a child. It should raise your standards NOT lower them. I met a wonderful man who was not my son's father. We dated 8 months before he met my son. We married when my son was 3 1/2 yrs. old. My son still remembers when it was just us two....BUT he also knows that my husband loves HIM.

One more thing...you need to decide what you want in a man....make a list NOW and be specific....AND include deal breakers. If you have to have brown hair...put it on the list. When you meet someone and they don't fit your list....ditch them. It's the best advice I ever got. I decided who my ideal man would be for me & my child (and future children) and my husband fits my list. We couldn't be happier.

Good luck

Answer 6

A good age was about 2 1/2 years ago. Now you have to just pray for a good man. Try to go to church to find a single dad. He will have his head on his shoulders and not be just looking for a ho.

Answer 7

I always thought mid to late twenties was a good age to get married, but its not like planning a visit to the dentist. You will get married when you find someone that is worthy of your hand in marriage, whether that's in 2 years or 20 years.

Answer 8

Wait a little longer at least until your 25 or so because the person you are now,will not be the same person then. You will be more mature and a little wiser in your choice of men.

Answer 9

well my mom had a 2 yr old [my brother] and married my father at the age at 23 and he was only 25

Answer 10

in 7 yrs time.
patience is the key to fullfillment
when youre 28 you will see things so much differently from now.