Why do people find the holidays' emotionally disturbing?

Answer 1

Because the 'Holidays' (any holiday, but the 'bigger' ones are worse) are a 'picture of perfection' we have in our minds, and the 'real holiday' is something completely different. People get together in 'family groupings' even if they don't like or approve of other family members. People drink too much, or take drugs, people fight, argue ... and some die either from violence or suicide.
My husband and I know this, and we always spend our holidays either at home, alone (just the two of us) or we go to a movie and dinner at someplace that DOES NOT SERVE the 'traditional holiday dinner.' We both have families, and could spend our holidays with either one (and sometimes members of both together) but we don't, because to us, the 'holiday' is 'sacred' ... a time when we want to BE HAPPY and HAVE FUN, and the only way we can guarantee that is to be 'JUST the two of us' ... and we occasionally see our families at other, less distressing times ... but mostly, we just want to 'be alone' because when we are together, just the two of us, we are HAPPIEST.

Answer 2

I grew up in a family where the holidays were no fun. On Christmas, my mom would storm around the house ranting about how everyone was so selfish and so forth. As I got older, I started to dislike the holidays because it was usually an unhappy time in my house. As an adult I started to enjoy the holidays more when I was married because my wife's family was alway more pleasant during that time. But since my divorce almost 8 years ago, I've fallen back to not liking the holidays.

I do my best not to sour other people's good cheer, but I also feel like many people put on this fake demeanor during the holidays that is nothing like their real personality and I hate that.

Answer 3

Speaking from experience for a long time I hated the Holidays. It reminded me of everything I did not have anymore. family true friends happy times etc etc
Now that I have kids well I have learned to take the traditions I loved and add them to new ones we all can enjoy.
So I think in many aspects it has to do with the loss, the wanting, the lack of the traditions.
So many things that we as social people hold close and dear are possibly not there or lost
It does not help that at this time of year when everyone and everything has so much focus on family and getting together with friends and tradition. That sort of magnifies any and all of those things that may in fact be absent from our own lives. Therefore leaving us feeling emotionally drained.

Answer 4

A few reasons come to mind.
Sometimes for people who have lost loved ones, it makes them remember their loss since the holidays are about being happy with friends and family. Another big reason is that there is so much emphasis on being happy and joyous. When you feel compelled to believe you SHOULD be feeling a certain way and don't, it's a big disappointment. Let's not forget about the financial strain holidays can put people in. Travel, gifts, yummy but junky food (and lots of it...), life patterns being totally messed up, need I go on?

Answer 5

Often people are away from their hometown or family and that causes some depression but overall it usually has to do with finances. Society has it set up that Americans need to buy, buy, buy for the holidays! It's wrong and the actually gift of the holidays is being with family and friends as a whole! Not that you have a Gucci watch!

Answer 6

I don't know... But I find summer to be somewhat unsettling.
You've got all this sun and free time and ...
Well, there's just not really any order to things.
The holidays kind of pull us through the hard winter months, but I think they are emotionally disturbing for people who have had loved ones stabbed to death by a christmas tree or something... idk...

Answer 7

The lack of relationships that would make people feel like the holidays is worth spending and sharing with people who care about them and vice versa. The holidays makes some people really depressed because it emphasizes their loneliness even more so than any other day. :(

Answer 8

There could be many reasons. Maybe they had a rough childhood, maybe they lost someone very close to them, or maybe they can't afford to have a nice holiday and just the sight of families getting together and enjoying themselves makes them depressed

Answer 9

because of the shopping i think for the first time in my life i am not looking forward to the holidays because of the shopping also there always seems to be family conflicts when families get together and thats what happens on the holidays families get together thats my theory anyway

Answer 10

Because the holidays usually mean family. And when you don't have a strong family life, you tend to get depressed when everywhere you turn, it's all about love and family.