How do you move on after a 18 year relationship has ended?

Question

This was the love of my life. We where having problems and seperated. I thought we were working things out, but he decided he wanted to move on.

Answer 1

Reach deep down and find your strength, keep moving. What ever you do don't let this keep you from falling in love again.

Answer 2

It is most difficult whenever a relationship ends, it hurts badly and this pain will not go away over night, but it will. If you feel there is still hope all the more the pain will linger. You must really be honest with your self and see if there was any thing you did when in this relaitonship that contributed to the break up. If it is something you can fix then try to, although if he already has decided to move on then you need to accept this fact. Just know, we all have been through a similar situation and we survived and so will you.

Answer 3

Sorry for your pain, i'm sure you must be having a rough time right now.

There are a lot of web sites for help... maybe you could do a yahoo search for COPING WITH A BREAK UP, LIFE AFTER DIVORCE. There are also DIVORCE FORUMS out there for people to talk about their problems... give and take support, which we sometimes need!

It's going to take time for you to adjust, that's for sure. Maybe find things to do in your spare time which make your life more productive -- a hobby like scrapbooking, or art work, take a karate class, swimming class, or join a gym. Get involved with others -- friends for lunch, etc.

We do grieve after a break up and it's perfectly normal. I sure hope you are able to move on eventually. Take care ok?

Answer 4

Sorry to hear about this....I can understand your pain, and know firsthand just how hard it is to survive each day when things have just happened!

Please try to look for help. The last thing you need is to feel dumb and guilty; things always happen for a reason (even though at the moment of pain we don't understand WHY...)

For a relationship to work out, it needs TWO TO TANGO.
Why would you stay with someone who didn't love you as much as you loved him?

If you tried your best.... but he still decided to leave, then it was he who made the final choice...and you have to accept it.
I KNOW it hurts, honey....but some things are not meant to be.We want them to be and try our best to make them work; but in the end we cannot make anyone else love or accept us.

OK...Perhaps this might help you. I did a lot of things in order to try to overcome my pain. I went to a therapist, went to a psychiatrist and took anti-depressants; went to church, read interesting books, found out about a nice website where people were very kind- ( it's called Lovingyou.com in case you want to visit it). I printed out the answers I got and re-read them whenever I needed strength....Sometimes people who don't even know you can give you the tip you need... or shed a light and give you hope.

I started exercising and tried to keep myself busy. I also relied on my good friends for company and -thank God- they were so kind they actually let me talk about the same thing for months!

I will keep you in my prayers and hope that each day you feel stronger. Remember the old Chinese saying: "Time can be your best friend...OR your worst enemy!" Try to focus on the good things you have, on your good traits and not on the negative ones. Help yourself and also ask God to help you.

Answer 5

I can only offer a personal perspective. When I got divorced, I thought it was the end of the world. I felt devastated. I only found my way out thru counseling, good friends, and finding some hobbies to make it thru the tough times. Just know this: you will come out of it, and your life will return to normal.

There really are a lot of fish in the sea for each of us. The first step is taking care of ourselves, then getting that confidence to go fishing again.

Answer 6

i understand your feelings. i left my husband 5 years ago, we met when i was 15yrs old and we were together for 23 years,married for 12yrs. i have never felt so much pain in my life,the first year was just horiffic, but let me assure you, with time it gets better. start thinking about what you want out of life and go for it. dont let this man have the better of you by being so hurt,show the world that you are just fine on your own!! personally i will never again give my heart away to any one. i will not be hurt like that again,but if you dont want to be alone then go for it girl and find yourself a real man,one that will treat you properly,they are out there so ive been told? good luck girlfriend.

Answer 7

Then so should you, it is difficult but you need to get out and be with friends. Find a hobby, or volunteer. Keep busy and soon you will be able to accept the change and hopefully start a new life and find happiness. Best wishes.

Answer 8

Is your paycheck sufficient to shield you and your daughter without him? Do you have adequate money to hire an lawyer to document a palimony and toddler custody and help case for you? Do you have the time, the money and the the place with all to discover a clean place of place of abode for you and your daughter? in case you answer absolute to 2 out of the three questions what are you waiting for. you're able to no longer experience undesirable or to blame and you certainly do no longer could positioned up with him accusing you of doing the failings he did to reason you soreness. To get inspite of him tutor him something of your existence is going to be way extra suitable than in case you had stayed with him and which you probably did no longer could strip your integrity for the rationalization to circulate away. If i replace into your IRL chum i might ask you if there is something i will do to assist? once you have all your geese in a row my truck is at your disposal and that i be attentive to 3 adult males to assist circulate the heavy stuff. could I commence accumulating those intense-high quality heavy double containers from the produce industry? solid success to you and your daughter.

Answer 9

Meet someone else & find new love!