My girlfriend and I have been together for three years. She has three kids from another relationship (two live with us). I am interested in having a child of my own. She believes in natural conception and not AI or Invitro. Should I break up with her just to have a child of my own? Or I bring up the subject again with her? It is all that I have been able to think about for the last year!
2007-11-08 06:29:07 · 11 answers · asked by EJ 5 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
My girlfriend is interested in having more children and said she would if she was ever in a relationship with a man again.
We have talked about adoption, but I physically want to have a child. She has done that. I want that connection to someone else.
2007-11-08 06:46:27 · update #1
I think if it is that important to you and you are really ready to have a child then she should understand. She has children and she knows what a joy that is. I think if she knows how bad you want a child and still is against it then she doesnt care as much as she should about your thoughts, and dreams. If she makes you change your mind and stay with her with out you having a child, it could be the worst mistake of your life. People will come and go, but once your child bearing days are gone you dont have a chance to go back again. I say you need to sit down and tell her that this is important to you and if she cant support you then she needs to hit the road! Good luck girl I hope you decide what is best for you and dont let anyone stand in your way!
2007-11-08 06:52:46 · answer #1 · answered by centwatson 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
So she doesn't believe in AI or Invitro. How about you?? What if you used AI, would she leave you? I know many lesbian couples that have had children this way? Or perhaps she doesn't want more kids? I know the instinct to have children can be strong. Could that be satisfied with adoption/fostering? I think that you both need to sit down and talk some more. You're respecting her views on AI and invitro, but she's not respecting your view on having kids. Try to find a compromise. There are at least 10 solutions to every problem, you might not like all the solutions - such as leaving your partner - but looking at them all might lead you to one that you haven't thought of before. Good luck.
2007-11-08 06:37:26 · answer #2 · answered by momaab 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
♥ I'm not sure why its imortant for her to have natural conception over Al or Invitro. The only difference is the actual sexual act. Tell her that you are NOT comfortable with natural conception [[due to the sexual intimacy with a male]] and that you really would enjoy having a child of your own.. Hopefully she will understand and see things your way. If she does not understand and this is something that is extremely important to you then you will have to weigh out the pros and cons of leaving her to have a child. Good Luck!
2007-11-08 06:35:36 · answer #3 · answered by NCIS ♥ Addict 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you should have a talk with her and explain how much you really want to have a child. Assuming you have the means to care for one, if she loves you she won't stand in your way simply over the method of fertilization.
I suspect though, that this is her way of objecting to you having a child at all. She doesn't want to say it directly, so she presents the objection indirectly.
If she truly supported your decision, I doubt she'd object to any of those methods, depending on which one was most suitable.
If you talk with her and she remains resolute in her stance, then I suppose you'll have to reevaluate how badly you want a child vs. how badly you desire to remain in the relationship.
2007-11-08 06:37:41 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think of lesbian is yet another be conscious for lazy . I m too lazy to nurture a dating with a guy by using fact there are too many regulations, so I ll exchange right into a lesbian and be in a dating the place my better half is as loopy as me. unquestionably pathetic.
2016-10-15 12:07:55 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She believes in "natural" conception? If that's what she believes, then it shouldn't affect your belief of in vitro or AI. Talk to her how you feel about having a baby this way and how much it means to you. I'm sure she won't have any objections. Now, breaking up just to conceive would upset her. Talk to eachother.
2007-11-08 06:34:28 · answer #6 · answered by MzzandtheChuchuBees 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Um, why doesn't she believe in it? Is it against her religion? Or is she just so opposed to it that she's unwilling to budge?
Either way, I'd try to explain to her how important having a child of your own is to you. If she can't accept that, maybe this isn't the relationship for you. As much as I hate to say that.
2007-11-08 06:33:02 · answer #7 · answered by DEATH 7 · 4⤊ 0⤋
If you want to have a child then that is your choice. No matter how you decide to do it, its YOUR choice. So make the decision for you because this is your body. You need to make yourself happy.
2007-11-08 07:13:38 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I wonder how could this work, so she wants you to do it with a male !?
2007-11-08 06:37:35 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's up to you to determine what is more important in your life.
2007-11-08 06:34:21 · answer #10 · answered by Dr Jello 7 · 0⤊ 3⤋