Can Yankees Fans Really Convert to Red Sox Fans?

Question

NEW YORK YANKEES TO BOSTON RED SOX FAN CONVERSION APPLICATION


Thank you for your interest in becoming a member of the Boston Red Sox Fan
Club. Due to an unprecedented volume of requests, we are currently
processing only fan conversion registrations for New York Yankee fans.
Conversion requests from other teams will be accepted once all Yankee
requests are processed. We expect this to take a number of weeks based upon
the current backlog of requests.

Please take a few moment s to fill out the conversion form below to help us
get to know you better and prescribe any required counseling to recover from
your previous fan experience.

Name: _______________________________


Address:______________________________


Who's Your Daddy: ____________________


1. Please select your favorite recent Yankee new player acquisition:

[ } Roger Clemens $20 million, six wins, one groin pull
[ ] Alex Rodriquez $92 million, no title, Ha!
[ ] Derek Jeter $123 million since last won world series
[ ] Jason Giambi $91 million, no title, lots of roid sweat
[ ] Carl Pavano $27 million, five wins


2. . Which of the following would you most like to see as the most played
YES Network "Great Moments in Yankee History" film clip in 2008:

[ ] Rivera's "shocking" blown save in Game 4, 2004
[ ] Rivera's "shocking" blown save in Game 5, 2004
[ ] The awesome wild card clincher celebration
[ ] Wang getting hammered in Game 1
[ ] Wang getting hammered in Game 2
[ ] Jeter's first GIDP
[ ] Jeter's second GIDP
[ ] Jeter's third GIDP



3.. Please indicate the last book you read:

[ ] Someday, in my lifetime, the Yankees will get to the LCS
[ ] Suicide Hotline - It's not just for Cubs' fans anymore
[ ] The Heimlich Maneuver -- What to do when choking


4. Which recent Yankees personnel move did you enjoy most:

[ ] Not winning the posting for Matsuzaka
[ ] Winning the posting for Kei Igawa

5. Which following designation best describes Derek Jeter's performance in
this year's ALDS:

[ ] Captain Intangibles
[ ] Captain GIDP
[ ] Captain & Tenille

6. Please choose your favorite movie:

[ ] Anger Management
[ ] Hunt for Red October
[ ] Damned Yankees
[ ] Still We Believe

7. Finish this sentence: "Alex Rodriquez is

a. overrated
b. overpaid
c. over

8. . Select the most vociferous, stupid, and annoying Yankee fan:

[ ] W ashed up "comic" hack and Yanks personal ballwasher Billy Crystal
[ ] Front-running celebrity phony Jack Nicholson
[ ] Tim McCarver



9 . Are you ready to admit that:

a. Ted Williams was better than Joe DiMaggio?
b. Carlton Fisk was better than Thurman Munson?
c. Even Manny Ramirez is faster than Bernie Williams?
d. Reggie Jackson was a better outfielder than Matsui?
e. Derek Jeter has less range than a kumquat
f. No self-respecting parasite would invade Jason Giambi?

10. Please indicate your favorite moments in Yankee history: (Check all
that apply):

[ ] Alex Rodriquez is traded to the Yankees
[ ] Don Mattingly never wins a World Series
[ ] The Yankees let Clemens get away
[ ] The Yankees get Clemens back
[ ] Giambi's steroid abuse causes his body to collapse like a screen
door in a hurri cane.
[ ] The bugs eat Joba

11 . Have you experienced any of the following after the embarras sing four
game collapse? (Check all that apply)

[ ] Headache
[ ] Uncontrolled Anger
[ ] Heartache
[ ] Holes punched in doors or walls
[ ] Nausea
[ ] Smashed TV screens
[ ] Depression and Broken Dreams
[ ] Avoided Red Sox fans for days or weeks


Once you have completed this form, please forward it to Fenway Park . Then
burn all your remaining Yankee clothing, memorabilia, and associated
reminders. After reviewing your request, the Red Sox Fan Club will contact
you with notification of acceptance or rejection.

I hereby acknowledge that the real "curse" is being a Yankee Fan.


I hereby renounce the New York Yankees for all eternity on this the ______
day of ________________, 200__
_________________

Answer 1

As a Yankee fan I gotta admit some of that was pretty funny. However, you have WAY too much time on your hands and about 20 more championships to go before you can talk like that. Red Sux fans think they are on top of the world because they win a couple World Series. LOL Winning a couple in 4 years is nothing. Try winning 3 or more in a row first. But hey... it's ok. You gotta learn to crawl before you can walk. But if you ever need to know how it's done, just take a look at the pinstripes because you wont find a better example anywhere. You gotta really be into S&M to be a Red Sux fan. Pain feels good huh? Sicko.

Answer 2

I am a Yankee fan for life!! That means, as any Red Sox fan should know taking the good with the bad, the lean times and the unfunny jokes. I will never switch my loyalties no matter how many rings any other team wins, by the way, I think the Yankees still have the MOST World Series victories. I will be patient because we will be back in the high life again. Thurman is my man!

Answer 3

Very creative and I give you a thumbs up for your effort. Hence, once a Yankee fan always a Yankee fan. If I may make a suggestion, an amendment page would be in order describing the George Steinbrenner egotistical rampage that drove the Yankees to this point.

From a Red Sox perspective you can only hope that management has learned a great deal from observing the Yankee meltdown. Lesson learned as not to repeat the same mistakes.

This day was inevitable. Sooner or later the money (greed) takes over and the consequence of that mindset has now put the Yankees in a no win situation.

Answer 4

I passed that around myself last week! It is pretty funny but, to answer your question, NO WAY! I honestly don't think a fan of either team could ever convert to the other. There has been too much water under the bridge for that. We may have respect for players or coaches but, never would we be able to be a fan of the other team.

Answer 5

as im sure you've realized, being a yankee fan is something you are born as. you cant change how you are born, especially to a bosox fan. it just cant be done.

and i have news for you. no one cares about dates, stats or any other cr@p like that. the only numbers that matter are:

26>7.

and do u remember the last time the yanks has to wait 20, let alone 86 years for ONE RING?????? thats right, never.

Answer 6

Nope being a Yankee fan is in the blood.......Just like i assume its the same for Red Sox fans its in their blood.....You should always remain loyal to your team no matter what happens.....There are far to many bandwagon fans around the league don't need them polluting the Yankee Red Sox rival!!!

Answer 7

LMAO.......HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA....OHMIGOD THAT WAS AWESOME......you know what's better though....seeing all the Yankee fans get so upset.....i mean for years they have been jeering us as losers, and now that we have won a couple and are happy.....cause really....who cares if we win 20 more.....we're CURRENTLY better than the spankees and that is all theat we care about....but the spankee fans are so upset that we are enjoying our seasons in the sun...they are POOR LOSERS....no matter how you slice it.....we sox fans....we are take our losses in stride....we hurt when we lose, but we don't whine and moan, and piss and cry when things don't go our way....so to all you yankee fans out there.....just keep eating that humble pie and SHUT THE HELL UP.....LOL

Answer 8

I'm not a Red Sox fan or a Yankees fan but this is hilarious and very creative rotflmao.

Answer 9

this is 1 funny @ss thing you got here. redsox rule and yankees suck.. and now theyll suck ever more because joe Torre is gone along with some of their good players like posada and maybe rivera and arod and i think more of their players are gone just because Torre left and alot of their success came from torre so you yankees are screwed

Answer 10

lol @ The bugs eat Joba.

I tell ya, when he gets traded to the Marlins in exchange for Robert Andino, the oppressive south Florida humidity gives those bugs the perfect backdrop to further torment Chamberlain on a daily basis.

Welcome to Miami, keed.