Help! How do I convince my Conservative-Christian dad that there is nothing wrong with gay marriage?

Question

My dad possesses a lot of wisdom. He knows more about religion and homosexuality than I do. He keeps winning the arguments/debates. But his opposition of gay marriage comes from his religious beliefs. Question is, can anyone give me a really good and valid argument that's in support of gay marriage?

Answer 1

I can but it is based on bashing religion.

I don't think that will go to well with your dad.

The same Bible he uses was used by Southern Baptists from the past in support of slavery. How can anybody use a book that had something as fundamental as slavery wrong? In both the New and Old Testament, the Bible supports slavery.

It was not too long ago that religious southern schools like Bob Jones University were using the Bible in defense of their anti-interracial dating rules.

NONRELIGIOUS ARGUMENT.

People do not choose their sexual orientation. You cannot raise a boy as a girl and expect him to like boys. It's been tried. Tell him about David Reimer and that quack psychologist John Money. David's penis was chopped off when he was a baby. Money told the parents to raise him as a girl because he believed sexual orientation was based on environment, not genetics. He was wrong. Long story short, both David and his brother commit suicide.

Answer 2

I'd say take marriage out of it. Part of the problem with the debate is that marriage is both a time-honored religious institution, and a legal term for a socio-economic partnership. Those two definitions should not be entertwined.

Currently, in most states, including this one, two or more consenting adults can do just about anything to eachother that they want (in private), married or not. Banning persons who engage in certain of those activities from getting hitched isn't going to stop those activities (and violates the constitutional implied right to privacy, in any case). OTOH, if two people want a certain legal status - currently called marriage - with respect to eachother, they are under no obligation to perform specific acts together, if neither of them want to.

If marriage is taken out of the legal codex and replaced with 'civil union' or some such, and who gets married in a religious ceremony is left entirely up to the church performing the ceremony, wouldn't it be all right to let any two (or more) persons enter into a 'civil union' that, legally, has nothing to do with religion or 'behind closed doors' consenting-adult type activities, but merely with how the law treats those entering into the legal arrangement?

Answer 3

An opinion based on religious principle is unchangeable. Particularly with support from sacred text.

The issue for me is whether we can truly consider this a Christian nation any longer, after the past 40 years of societal erosion of Christian values.

The best argument in favor of gay marriage is that the state has no business legislating marriage to begin with; therefore, any religion which wishes to marry gays should be free to do so. The only legitimate involvement of the state in marriage is the control and protection of offspring. Incidentally, this is also the best non-religious argument against gay marriage.

Answer 4

Simple, the government has no business basing laws on religious beliefs. Talk about equal protection of the law.

There is no 3000 year tradition of marriage in the United States. Tradition is a bad defense for continuing to do something wrong. Early biblical followers sacrificed animals. Maybe we should do that, there is a longer tradition.

To really make sense of it all we have to look at what marriage in the US really is. Since the US does not have an official religion all legal marriages are civil marriages. A civil marriage grants the parties certain rights and responsibilities. All marriages granted by states are "civil unions". Why is it appropriate to discriminate against some people by cheapening their relationship because you do not agree with their lifestyle? Remember, these arguments against same-sex marriages were also used to prevent blacks from marrying. Let’s not get in to the next people will be marring dogs or furniture bs.

Religious marriage is appropriately regulated by the church. They can either accept or reject same-sex marriage all they want.

Many will also state that same sex marriages should not be allowed because the marriage cannot produce children. My wife and I are married. We were married at the courthouse as we reject organized religion. We cannot have any more children. Should the state have prevented our marriage since we could not produce children? You can't have it both ways, you either need to limit marriage to those couples that are going to reproduce or allow any two consenting adults to marry.

We are not talking about granting any one “special rights”. Allowing same-sex marriage does not take anything away from anyone. The fact that some believe that it offends the majority does not change that it is the right thing to do. At one time letting blacks get married offended the majority. Luckily we learned to be better human beings and got past the hate.

Answer 5

You will not win the argument if his opinion is based off of religion. The best is to agree to disagree, because no matter how many valid points you bring up, he will never acknowledge your point. Not saying that your dad is a bad guy, but people who are against gay marriage for religious beliefs see the whole picture in black and white, and forget that the gray area exists.

Answer 6

If gay marriage is allowed...how about if 3,4,5 or more people want to marry each other. Is that okay as well. If you say its not...how do you justify that restriction. Aren't you then imposing your beliefs on what type of relationship should be recognized by the government?
Marriage is between a man and a women and should be encouraged by a society as it encourages children by its very nature. Married couples with or without children tend to be more financially stable than those of single parents. I would not oppose civil unions if that is what a state wants to do but marriage is and should always be between a man and a women. Just my opinion.

Answer 7

God asks that his followers respect the governance of them.
Our Government is powered by the people in majority, but was given specific framework to prevent the government from getting in the way of the beliefs of its citizens.
Our government has no authority to prevent persons from coupling.
Christian's can continue to bring others to Christ and convert them, gain the majority, and persuade, but God would not force others to be like Christians. That must be left to free will.

Answer 8

No.

Most sensible Gay people don't want to be married anyways.

I have a friend who is an old school Lesbian. She said that marriage is a Hetero term and this current Gay Marriage movement is not helping the Gay community as a whole.

VOTE RU PAUL 2008!

Answer 9

You will never convience him that its right. If he is strong in his beliefs he will not falter on his ideas of being moral! A true Christian (in my eyes) is not one the condems the gay community, yet does not believe that our sacred vow of Marriage should be altered to conform to them. I, personally, believe that God does love everyone, even the gays...but I do not want to see the wedding vows given to gay people. They can use a "commitment" ceremony to seal the deal....Marriage was defined as being b/t one man and one woman. You will never change your fathers beliefs as I also doubt he will change yours. You should just agree to disagree...sometime I have to do that w/ my father!!

Answer 10

You can appeal to emotion...

One of my friend's dads was in a committed long-term relationship with someone of the same-sex. They had been together for years but had no legal connections.

When he was in the hospital, dying rapidly of cancer, only family was admitted to visit him. The man he had loved and lived with for years never got to say goodbye.

Just focus on the practical benefits of marriage as opposed to its spiritual nature. Compare it to other forms of contract law.