My friend was telling me about a tricky situation she' s in at the moment. She's been going out with her boyfriend for 5 years now but a year back they were having really big problems and considered seperating. Thankfully, it all worked out ok and they are now happy and worked through their problems. At the time, however, she confided in a male colleague at work her problems and he was very supportive. He told her she is lovely and deserved someone worthy of her. A few months ago, he asked her how things were between her and her boyfriend and she said, good because they had solved their problems and are now happy. Ever since, she says the guy at work has been a bit aloof and moody with her and whenever he sees her he goes bright red. She has asked for my advice..what should I say? What's going on here?
2007-11-08 02:43:28 · 12 answers · asked by Fluffy ♥ 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
She opened up to him and he seen her heart, and liked what he saw. I would say treat him as she always has, avoiding deep conversation and such. Ignore the moodiness as if it is not there, and be normal with him in actions and words. Time will heals his wounds....
2007-11-08 02:46:35 · answer #1 · answered by Jengi 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Cynical View:
I think the guy thought he may have had a chance with you friend and was only being 'friendly' cos of a chance to be with her.
Regardless if the above view is correct or not, and to avoid having the situation blow up, I would suggest that your friend talk to him in private saying something along the lines of:
a) Thank you for helping me during my rough patch
b) I find you a very nice person, I noticed you've been acting distant between us. I apologise if I've led you astray into thinking we could've been a couple
Ladies as you all know, men need their egos expand, so make it sound like its ur fault and you should be fine.
2007-11-08 10:52:44 · answer #2 · answered by wasabi_racer 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The guy likes her - plain and simple!
He was only supportive of her as a way into her emotional life. He wanted to be the shoulder to cry on at work - so that hopefully he could work his way into her life. When she was able to work thing out and is now happy again with Mr. Previous - Mr. Sneaky has no angle to play... He tryied to play her and got played himself! That is where the moodiness is coming from.
She is better off and she doesn't need the headgames - besides if she is able to work through problems with Mr. Previous - maybe he is Mr. Right!?!?
Tell her what I said if you agree...
2007-11-08 10:51:17 · answer #3 · answered by INTIMIDATOR 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Apparently he thought he had a chance with her and is disappointed and put out by her relationship now going well. I think she should talk to him alone, tell him how much she has valued his friendship in her time of need and reassure him that the friendship does not have to end unless he prefers it that way.
2007-11-08 10:48:07 · answer #4 · answered by sassy lass 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The coworker was waiting for a trainwreck but when his expectation was dashed he felt disappointed and maybe angry because he thinks he invested some much time and effort trying to become her knight in shining armour. She should just stop trying to communicate with the co-worker until he gets over himself.
2007-11-08 10:48:03 · answer #5 · answered by ♥Šωèé†íé♥ 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The guy at work fancies her, she should try to avoid using him as some1 to confide in as he seemw to be taking it the wrong way, i think he is expecting more than friendship with this friend of yours. She may need to say to him that she is sorry if he thought more of the situation and could they still remain friends, for working purposes ( as it may be hard to work together if their is friction!!)
2007-11-08 11:33:01 · answer #6 · answered by cooper 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He had expectations of getting together with your friend, which blew up in his face.
Having expectations of others, is a set-up for a big let down, as you can see by this guy's reaction to your friend's boyfriend situation.
Live, learn.. don't expect things from others, or make plans for yourself with someone who may not have the same thing in mind.
2007-11-08 10:47:03 · answer #7 · answered by letterstoheather 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Well it's obvious that he likes her. She could always talk to him and tell him that she sees him as a good friend but at the current point in time, that's all she can be with him is a friend.
2007-11-08 10:47:07 · answer #8 · answered by Thomas H 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh i think he is interested in her in a big time..Maybe she needs to ask him what is going on and be hionest and tell him that it worries her why is acting that way...Tell her just to inocently ask not to comment on but to let him talk and maybe have her tell him that she is beeing worried that she said or did something..trust me if he cares for her he will feel bad and also embaresed about his acting
2007-11-08 10:49:27 · answer #9 · answered by ms. sunshine 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like that guy thought your friend may have been hitting on him to take her personal problems to him like that. He was probably hoping she would dump her boyfriend and start up with him and now is embarassed and feels rejected.
2007-11-08 10:46:44 · answer #10 · answered by wellbeing 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋