I cut her off for 2 years, now she is saying how sorry she is, and blaa, blaa, blaa, she's changed and wants to bring our family back together. I have talked to her via email, and she still acts the same. Whatever I say, she has to top it; like it's a competition thing. It's insane. No matter what, she always feel the need to be either doing better than me, making more money, happier in her marriage, kids smarter, whatever the need or situation is, she comes back to top it. Ex. my daughter is a cheeleader and son loves to read.....her daughter is a cheerleader, dancer for the band, and learning from Alex Haley...her son read heirogliphics, and Japenese. Or I may say, I cooked last night..."oh I cook every single night". Just no matter what, she feels the need to top or prove that she is better, and the funny part is....SHE LYING!!! What should I do. My intuition is to cut her back off, and call it as a lost. I only wanted our kids to grow up together b/c they are family.
2007-11-08 02:42:25 · 18 answers · asked by sassy lady 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
The Question is what or how should I deal with her or should I just cut her off completely?
2007-11-08 02:51:44 · update #1
Cut the Bit** off youre better off without her anyways!
2007-11-08 02:49:45 · answer #1 · answered by Mari 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
While it may be true that "blood is thicker than water," there's nothing wrong with cutting off a person who presents something negative for your children to be around. If she were a heroin addict, would you feel guilty about keeping her away from your children? What if she were a child abuser? The question you have to ask is where do you draw the line? Personally, I'd have no trouble whatsoever cutting a bragging, lying, cheating cousin out of my life and out of my family's life.
2007-11-08 10:50:02 · answer #2 · answered by Happy-2 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yea I don't think you are ready yet, I think in due time it will all work itself out. I still would not put the two of them in the same room... I would never "call it a loss" just distnace. BUT your kids reallllly should know eachother and grow up together, there has to be a way that that can happen without you two being together?
2007-11-08 11:04:22 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Cut her off i know wht ur talking about i have such cousin's too they try to top at everything my sis and i do or have like in my sis's case they try to top her happily married life what u have to do is not let it bother u that much,talk to her when u meet her in party's or somewhere only a lil chitchat like hi how r u then say u have to go before she says anything i know u want ur kids to grow up together b/c they are family but keep them abit away from family because when ur kids grow up theyll end in ur case like theyr cousin's tryin to top them ,so i think u shouldnt be too close to ur cousin and she also crossed the line with having the affair with ur husband...............
2007-11-08 11:48:23 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I personally would cut her off completely. She wasn't considerate of your relationship or feelings two years ago, and neither is she now. She destroyed your family and your life. I'm not sure how you could ever forget that. I'm sure there are plenty of other family members that your daughter can associate with. I see no reason to expose yourself or your own daughter to a lying segment of your family.
2007-11-08 14:20:13 · answer #5 · answered by Sondra 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Playing the devil's advocate here. Maybe she is trying to get you to accept her again. Maybe she wants you to feel she is happy in her marriage because she feels bad for what she did. Besides if you say you haven't talked to her in 2 years I can't imagine her just coming out and telling you about all the bad things in her life.
If it's just for the kids and it's not something you really want - I would say keep your distance.
2007-11-08 12:07:51 · answer #6 · answered by That Deal 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Things cannot be as they were. Her actions tore apart the family. She is trying to put humpty dumpty back together again but as we know, that failed. Tell her she needs a reality check and stop e-mailing you.
2007-11-08 10:51:27 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know family is family, but do you wnat your kids to be around someone that always has to top them and you to make themselves feel better, if it was me I would ask myself do I really want this personin my life, and can I trust her, and you will have your answer, good luck.
2007-11-08 10:48:35 · answer #8 · answered by hollytu514 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
everyone makes mistakes, that's life. but in this situation, i would never trust my cousin again. that's completey messed up exspecialy that your family, your family is suppose to protect you & keep any harm from you. i think you should have a talk with her & explain how you feel, ask her how she felt if you did this to her.
2007-11-08 10:58:40 · answer #9 · answered by chrissy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just set aside the fact you don't trust her at all and look at her.... she annoys you, tries to out-do you, and is generally obnoxious.
Why bother?
Move forward with your life. It won't hurt to let her know you aren't interested in a relationship with her -- because from where i sit, you are not.
2007-11-08 11:04:51 · answer #10 · answered by letterstoheather 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋