My Girlfriend Is Pregnant And Wants to abort It,How Can I make her keep it?

Question

I been dateing my girlfriend for 3years,she is 23 and i am 20.she just found out that she is pregnant .We talked about keeping the baby. Most of the time she said she wanted it.But when she told her family about this, they said she is to young.Her family is Korean.My mother is 100% keeping it .Now my girlfriend wants to abort it.she said she feels like she is not ready. this will be our 2nd baby we aborted if she does this abortion. I cant let her do it again.what can i do to make her keep our baby?

Answer 1

Unfortunately, our crazy laws are on her side. The law says it's "her body" (which it isn't, the baby has its own body and rights) and "her choice" (which it isn't because it takes 2 to make a baby).

I am really disappointed in you as a man that you are having sex with a woman you are not married to. Women do get pregnant, you know, even when they are on birth control, and your behavior has been very weak and irresponsible.

It's time for you to grow up and be a man. That means abstinence from now on. Learn to control yourself until you find the woman you will marry. Perhaps your girlfriend is that woman. If so, propose and tell her that you love her and the baby and want to make a commitment to them both.

If she's not "the one" then you need to do all in your power to get this baby put up for adoption. Ask your girlfriend if she will go with you to a Crisis Pregnancy Center. There are great ladies there who will show her love and support and help her through this. They will probably let her get an ultrasound so the two of you can look at your tiny baby.

Pray hard! Pray she will have a change of heart. And pray for chastity. If you have been sexually active this long, it's going to be hard to stop until you marry, but you can do it with God's help.

Answer 2

Hey, don't let her do it. Even if she doesn't want to be part of its life thats fine, tell her you will take full responsibility of it. Have her read this poem, I don't see how anyone could read this and still go through with it. Also how far along is she? go to babycenter.com and they have these pics of each week of pregnancy and how the baby is developing, it can show her that it most likely has a heart beat and is a little person.

Mommy
I am only 8 inches long
but I have all my organs.
I love the sound of your voice.
Every time I hear it
I wave my arms and legs.The sound of your heart beat
is my favorite lullaby.

Month Two

Mommy
today I learned how to suck my thumb.
If you could see me
you could definitely tell that I am a baby.
I'm not big enough to survive outside my home though.
It is so nice and warm in here.


Month Three

You know what Mommy
I'm a boy!!
I hope that makes you happy.
I always want you to be happy.
I don't like it when you cry.
You sound so sad.
It makes me sad too
and I cry with you even though
you can't hear me.


Month Four

Mommy
my hair is starting to grow.
It is very short and fine
but I will have a lot of it.
I spend a lot of my time exercising.
I can turn my head and curl my fingers and toes
and stretch my arms and legs.
I am becoming quite good at it too.


Month Five

You went to the doctor today.
Mommy, he lied to you.
He said that I'm not a baby.
I am a baby Mommy, your baby.
I think and feel.
Mommy, what's abortion?


Month Six

I can hear that doctor again.
I don't like him.
He seems cold and heartless.
Something is intruding my home.
The doctor called it a needle.
Mommy what is it? It burns!
Please make him stop!
I can't get away from it!
Mommy! HELP me!


Month Seven

Mommy
I am okay.
I am in Jesus's arms.
He is holding me.
He told me about abortion.
Why didn't you want me Mommy?



Every Abortion Is Just . . .
One more heart that was stopped.
Two more eyes that will never see.
Two more hands that will never touch.
Two more legs that will never run.
One more mouth that will never speak.

I hope this helps, it almost brings me to tears when I read it. If there is anything I can do to help just let me know. I'm 17 and my fiance and I are expecting baby #1 and we're going to keep it. Good Luck

Answer 3

It is tough when ones family may be bullying her into doing this. She is 23 and her own women, it is her body so she should be able to do what she wants with it. Tell her of the medical ramifications, as if something goes wrong she may never be able to have a baby. I can't believe her family would tell her such things. My friend is 24 and having her second child. My other friend had her first way to early and that was at the age of 16, now that is way to young, she is now having her fifth child at the end of the year. You could alway get some baby photos or point babies out when you are out together. When I am pregnant everyone around me is pregnant. Support her, love her and cherish her, this is what she needs right now. I would say she is very confused as what too do. Good luck

Answer 4

Unfortunately, you can't force her to do anything. You can tell her you will be their to support her. If she doesn't want to keep the baby you can encourage her to put it up for adoption. Maybe your parents can adopt it. Someone else said if you think you two are right why don't you marry her and have the baby together just be perfectly clear to her that you will support her in raising the baby! That's all I can say and please if you are not ready for children use contraceptives or stop having sex. Abortion is not a form of contraception! Good Luck!

Answer 5

This is a tough situation for both of you. You can not force her to keep the baby. The only thing that you can do is explain how important it is to you and be as supportive as you can. COming from an Asian family, she is probably under a ton of pressure. All you can do is reassure her that everything will be ok and pray for the best. If however, she does decide that she still wants to have an abortion, the best advice that I can give you is to use protection so that you do not have to go through this again. Multiple abortions can lead to fertility issues down the line if you are not careful. Good luck

Answer 6

You probably cant make her do anything but try going to the dr with her and expressing your concerns in front of the dr before the procedure. Maybe the dr will refuse to do it if s/he knows that at least one parent is involved and wants to have the baby. Otherwise I think you both need to be more mature and use a more effective birth control method, try not having sex since you both arent ready for the responsibilities of a child. Maybe its time for a new relationship, especially since it seems like you have different ideals and values.

Answer 7

sadly, it is not up to you to decide, but as someone who has had 2 abortions, I have to say that her chances of actually having a safe and healthy pregnancy diminish with each abortion that she has. there is only so much scar tissue that the body can handle before it causes irreparable damage. Most Asian families are bonded strongly in how the parents view the child and how much shame it will bring them, but we're not in Asia, are we? Her parent's feelings should have no bearing on her decision because it is yours and hers- alone, and her parents need to stay out of it. They feel the way they do now, but rest assured once that child is born they will change their minds completely. Maybe you should take your girlfriend to your moms and have her explain all of this to her and maybe it should be your mom that helps her, since obviously she seems to be more understanding about this. Good luck to you.

Answer 8

well for starters,if she does decide to terminate and its the second time she's done it then i would strongly suggest you invest in a far more reliable form of contraception than you've been using.as for keeping it and i really hope you can convince her to do so,explain that abortion is not the solution its thought to be,prevention is.its a little irresponsible to keep doing this to unborn babies don't you think?convince her that you can provide for the baby and that you will support her also.it amazes me how people are so nonchalant about terminations.I'm pro choice but the casual attitude about these procedures is totally wrong.its not a form of contraception yet is used as such by so many.

Answer 9

sadly you cant MAKE her do anything and it is her body and her choice you have to respect that...Im wondering why though you arent both more careful and use contraception seeing this is your 2nd pregnancy and obviously unwanted...... and also what do you mean your mother is 100% keeping it.... she has no say in the matter this is only between you and your gf, if i were you both of you need to seek proffessional help but in all reality if your gf mind is made up then so be it... by the way yes your both young and babies are a fulltime job and expensive....think about the life you could..or could not provide if you have this child.!

Answer 10

Both of you may be too young to have children at this time but as you know you reap what you sow, sex outside of marriage is clearly no way to live, you cannot eat your cake and have it.

Your actions always have consequences, you now have a dilemna of the future of your child. My advise is you can get married but of course you are too young for that too or talk to God about it that your girlfriend's heart will be softened in order that she will decide to keep the child.

Don't forget, the law may legalise abortions but God has never given such a licence, your girlfriend is not the giver of life, it is sacred to God. Talk to Him , there's no problem He cannot fix.

Answer 11

You can't make her do anything cause it is her life and her body.
No matter how much you talk to her about it she is going to do what she wants. She is old enough to take care of it though. It is not like she is 14 years old.

If she has another abortion and you stay with her then you should start using condoms and spermicide so it won't happen again.
Why didn't she learn after the first abortion and get on birth control? Birth control is FREE at the health department.

Maybe she is in shock right now and don't know what to do but she is grown and she shouldn't be thinking she is too young, if she thinks that then why is she even having sex if she cannot handle the outcome?