Is it harder to bear an accusation when you are at fault or when you are innocent?

Question

It would be nice if you could support your opinion with some experiences, preferably, your own.

The reason why this isn't under 'ethics' because I don't mean it politically... but from the view of the victim - entirely!

Answer 1

Personally I find it harder to bear an accusation when I know I am at fault. When I am innocent I know that I have done nothing wrong so my conscience is clear. When I am at fault I can feel the guilt eating away inside of me.

Answer 2

Surely you knew the answer as you posted it.

There are many many types of people in our planet. Therefore I will merely take a small sampling of people and I will call them "ordinary people who gets accused of something"

The "something" may be
1. spreading a gossip. One of the most common accusations flung by people against other people
2. Cheating- another commonly accused sin, this time by boyfriends/girlfriends, etc.

Let us stay with those, since all the others might be felonies and involve the law.
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Being accused is a test of ones character and ones fortitude.
Of course it is best to be innocent because you can always use the righteous indignation huffing and puffing "how dare you accuse me ( ME??? of all people?) response.

I have known people who will bear grudges and will still remember after decades have passed, when they have been accused of anything.

When you are at fault, even though you have no malice in creating trouble for someone or group of people, such as telling on the whereabouts of classmates in the school yard where they were eventually caught smoking cigarettes for example, the fallout can be just as nasty.

Being accused is unpleasant. The degree of unpleasantness gets less as you develop some street smarts, and some ability to fight back. In the end you will lose friends, and you will gain some who will be in your corner.

When you are alone and you count your wounds, you will wonder why the world is cruel when you know that people are the sole authors of their own problems. How did you get involved in their blasted problems?. Does that sound familiar?

It is all part of growing up. Some of your "friends" will be ditched at various stages in your life. You will keep the "gems " and the "lifers" and you will treasure them for the rest of your life.

I wish you good friends because morally upright human beings who stay morally upright when it is extremely hard to do so are hard to find. And there are bullies everywhere, not just in elementary and high school.


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Answer 3

It is easy to bear accusations when you know you are wrong. Just admit it, rectify it, and then you have nothing to hide. It also shows depth of character to be able to confess mistakes without fear of what people think.

If you are innocent, it is hard, because you have anjustly been accused and it can take time for people to find out the truth, or maybe not at all.

But, by admitting when you are at fault, people will learntquickly that you are no coward and are willing to take the blame when it is just, and therefore more likely to accept you're explanation as being true if you are innocent.

Always admit when you've messed up, it makes life so easy. It leaves you with nothing to hide

Answer 4

I beleive i am an honest person and that is one of the qualities i like in people. I am more than happy to accept blame if i have done somethign wrong - we are all human and anyone who says they have never made a mistake is a liar. I feel so strongly about accepting mistakes and learnign from them, that i have taught many of the team memebrs who work for me - that everyone makes mistakes, but the people that learn from them are the ones who admit them.

I absolutely HATE being blamed for something i did not do - there have been times when i have accepted this is the way of the world and quietly fumed about it. Like when you are told by your manager to do something and you do and then your regional manager goes off their nut at you for doing it and what were you thinking - you idiot! Other times - i have spoken up and said - hold on - you know i will admit if i have done something wrong - i am the first to acknoweledge it - so when i tell you i did not do this - beleive me!

When people know what sort of person you are i find it makes you less succeptable to false accusations. Why blame someone you know will actually tell the truth and be beleived?

Answer 5

I have found it much more difficult to bear when accused of things of which I was in fact innocent.

When I have been accused of things which I have done - then it is almost a relief for it to come out into the open.

Years ago when I was nursing I was accused of withholding pain relief and care. I wasn't actually working that shift and yet I was still made to front management and explain myself. The worst part was I felt so powerless and angry. And I was never able to talk to the family who lodged the complaint and explain that they had made a mistake. It still makes me angry to this day.

Answer 6

I think if your innocent it is harder. Either way you have to prove your innocence. I was accused once of changing a work schedule, which I didn't do, but I knew who did. I was wriiten up and told I was on thin ice. I tried to defend myself, but the boss had already made up his mind that I did it. I never told him who did it because I couldn't prove that she did. So another girl and I set her up to do it again and made sure the boss knew. He fired the girl and apoligized to me, but I thought, how scary to be tried and convicted like that, knowing I didn't do anything wrong.

Answer 7

I think when you're at fault, because it really touches a raw nerve. When someone has a go at us about something, our natural instinct is to get defensive, but when you're in the wrong, you have to go against that natural instinct. Also, nobody likes to get caught.

Answer 8

wen ur innocent because doing something wrong and being puished is just. being punished while innocent is unjust and wood make me feel horrible instead of just regretful.