are these signs of an affair?

Question

my husband of four years told me that im getting to emotionally attached. he has been sleeping at our lake house for 3 days. a few months before he left he started acting really weird and suspicious

*we have a 3yo daughter n two more on the way
(maybe hes feeling smothered?)

******kitty
yesterday marked 3 days

Answer 1

It could be but what exactly is " too emotionally attached"? Like what does he mean and what do you do that causes him to think that way? He should be very happy to have a family and more children on the way and a wife who really loves him. Isn't that the reason we get married? To love and be loved back? I can't wait to come home from work just to be with my wife and family. And I really can't wait until the weekend gets here to be with my wife even more. And she feels the same way about me. Try asking your husband what exactly it is that he wants and also what does he really mean by that statement. You could always drive out to the lake house to see what he is up to. So what if it is snooping. This is your husband and your life. (smile)

Answer 2

I hate to say it, but it does sound like a big possibility. Too emotionally attached? You're married! It sounds like he is becoming less emotionally attached, so your attachment now seems too much. That could be for many reasons... he could feel smothered by the thought of 3 children... but you're pregnant and he's been sleeping at the lake house. Regardless that isn't right. This is not good husband behavior. I would most definitely check for other signs of an affair because it sounds that way. You know your husband's normal behavior... start checking phone records and other things, and look for odd numbers that he has been calling a lot or at odd times. If the lake house is not visible and he knows you won't go check on him (or at certain times), he could be having someone over. It's not a definite, but you should investigate. Also, if he's not, maybe he's thinking about it or has someone in mind. Watch for suspicious behavior... for example, if he doesn't normally buy you many things and he starts sleeping at home, and starts buying you things and/or over praising and expressing love - this is often a sign of guilt and/or cover up during an affair. If he is, whatever you do, know that it's not your fault! It is his choice. I really wish you good luck on this one!

Answer 3

WTF too emotionally attached you married for god's sake. i think he has some serious explaining to do maybe it is time for you to make a surprise visit to the lake house. it is totally possible he is having an affair but never assume without solid proof.

I think he may have said this becuase he is thinking of divorce
why say your getting to emotionally attached if you love the person your with. Is that not what you want is a emotional bond to your mate.

You are right to be concerned and to think something fishy is going on. Investigate further.

God Bless and Best Wishes

P.S. It could also be that the hormone changes and your mood swings are driving him nuts and he is just needing some space.

Answer 4

You are going to have three kids with this man, of course you are going to be emotionally attached! He may just be freaking out about the two new additions. Talk to him. My husband would have to come up with a better reason than needing space if he were to leave me at home pregnant with a three year old!

Answer 5

I'm sorry to say this but it sounds like he is having an affair.

It makes no sense for someone to leave an expectant wife and their 3 year old daughter because the wife is too emotionally attached.. It makes no sense at all.. Stop making excuses for him and ask him. Keep in mind that he may deny it.

Good luck.

Answer 6

He has a serious problem as it does not look like he wants you or your daughter, or the two that are on the way. It may be that the thought of having three children is overwhelming to him, but TOO BAD, they are his children, arent they? It is no time to pout and 'stay at your lake house of 3 days'. You are the one that is stuck with the problems of raising three children alone if he has other things in mind. I feel sorry for you. Don't feel sorry for him feel sorry for YOURSELF.

Answer 7

it is true that they do act weird and they don't quite seem like who they were when they are cheating. but communicate with him ask him what is wrong. when your married your suppose to be emotionally attached when your in love. he isn't being very fair or considerate to u when u need him the most. he may need some therapy, but talk to him about his problem, ask him what would make things better. if he responds negatively than the problem isn't with u but within himself and he could be seeing someone else and living at home could be causing him too much guilt.

Answer 8

Um... when you are married you ARE emotionally attached (at least, that is the norm).

There is something wrong with this picture. Maybe it's time to have a chat with him, suggest some therapy to find out what is going on in your marriage, and what you might do to make it work... and to learn to communicate.

Ask him if what he wants... ?

Answer 9

i have seen this to many times where the wife has a child and she gives all this attention to the child . and the father does feel left out of the whole thing , i dont know if words can be enough , might say ok . i'm finding your mom or a baby sitter for a weekend and ill come join n you at first this can all be over whelming i think you all need together time , if after that nothing happens at least you know you gave it your best shot , see what happens from there . if he still wants to stay there it might be reason for concern

Answer 10

I would follow him to your lake house, that doest make sense if your pregrent and he is not with you that doest seem right.. I would think he would want to be with you and make sure your ok.

When my dad started cheating on my mother, he got really weird.. Talking on the phone in the bathroom, going to the store and coming back 4 hours later, So on and so on. Me and my sister knew my dad was cheating on my mom before my mom found out!