My husband and I had a big fight. He ended up getting drunk with his friends and going to a strip club. He never came home that night. When I asked him why he did it, he said he knew it would piss me off. He knows how anti stripper I am. I am extremely hurt and am finding myself turning to another man. Should I simply let go or am I right to be so upset?
2007-11-07 07:17:57 · 15 answers · asked by Steph 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Maybe you should learn a lesson. If acting a certain way runs him out of the house where he will become drunk and do stupid sh!t, then perhaps you should NOT ACT THAT WAY.
2007-11-07 07:25:58 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I must say in my 53 years of experiance , I can't say another man is adding fire to fire.
I would suggest sitting down talking this out you both being honest with each other, No hold bared. Remember your wedding vows were made first to God than the two of you. This is a christian's addvice, you must pray together and seek the Lord or someone of
moral value. It is so easy to do the wrong thing . at the same time if you turn to another man . is this for sex or confort, a good friend could do that . Reading your Bible, finding a friend that would remain morally fair to both of you. Once you have crossed the line it is hard evermore to dissolve those mind thoughts to even forggive yourself.
You certainly can at this point forgive your husband and go on together. Hurts or part of life and marriage,sorrow, grief,but working together for unity is can be a road for everlasting unity.
Married at 18 husband died 60 birthday 1987
2007-11-07 07:48:12 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It depends if he does it all the time, he is not right by doing this and you might have to forget it if it is a one-time thing. It's good to have some morals and be anti stripper, but in no way are you right to turn to another man just because you and your husband had a fight. This sounds like a drastic step on your part to handle your problems in this way.
You need to start talking about your problems in a civilized manner, do that now before your problems become worse. Go to your husband---tell him you do not want your marriage in trouble and to be making each other unhappy--no one will win this way. Start working on making things better--in a positive way.
2007-11-07 07:25:38 · answer #3 · answered by skyward 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You have every right to be upset, however, if he just looked and didn't touch let it go. You said he knew it would upset you, if you don't let him know you're upset he has no power. Is that all it'll take to end your marriage? Sounds like the marriage was already on rocky ground if a fight sent him to a stripper and the stripper has sent you to another man.
2007-11-07 07:48:57 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have to let him know how it upset you and then try to let it go. You can't keep bringing it up BUT he needs to realize that what he did was wrong and never do it again. Do not turn to another man, that makes you just as bad as what he did, even worse. It is hard when someone does something just for spite, but it will eat away at you if you don't discuss it and get over it even though it is VERY difficult.
2007-11-07 08:05:39 · answer #5 · answered by *Sharon* 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you ever find yourself "turning to another man", there are more deep-seated issues in your marriage than just your husband going to a strip club. You both need to go to counseling and work this out.
2 wrongs don't make a right, you know.
2007-11-07 07:26:19 · answer #6 · answered by KitKat 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It sucks, you have the right to be upset. But turning to another man is like two wrongs don't make a right. Even if it's platonic, you are probably turning to this other man to get back at your husband, just like he went to the strip club to get to you.
2007-11-07 07:22:31 · answer #7 · answered by ~Lizzy~ 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should be hurt. He did something intentionally to hurt you, knowing that it would hurt you. Even if he was right about the fight, he should be apologizing for that.
But you shouldn't be turning to another man for comfort. It's up to you and your hubby to work through this without you running off into another man's arms. That would hurt your husband as badly as he hurt you, but it wouldn't fix anything.
2007-11-07 07:22:55 · answer #8 · answered by mikah_smiles 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You have a right to be upset, with his nonsense. He would get the silent treatment from me until I am really to talk to him. Don't even put yourself out their trying to turn to another man, two wrong don't make it right. He will see that you are the women for him.
2007-11-07 07:24:50 · answer #9 · answered by dbrh_soto 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have a right to be upset, but you DON'T have a right to turn to another man.
Tell him if he does it again, you'll cut off his man parts, put them in a blender and serve them for breakfast. Then you get over it and remain faithful to the man you MARRIED.
2007-11-07 07:31:20 · answer #10 · answered by Roland'sMommy 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋