so my 3 year old which is in special ed pre-school because of a speech problem?

Question

has been crying the past 3 day's when the bus come's to pick him up he tell's no no school mama i called the teacher and she said not to worry that she will be writting everything down he dose. She said there not doing anything new so what can it be?? When he get's home he's happy and in his oun word's tell's me what he did. Please anyone help me what could it be?? =(

Answer 1

if he is not special ed why is he in a special ed program in the first place? why don't you try sending him with a speech therapist instead of a school were he doesn't belong? he probably doesn't have any friends simply because he has nothing in common with the other children there.

Answer 2

My son is 3 years old and has language and sensory issues. He started pre-school last winter, was the youngest one there, and had to be taken out because of separation anxiety. He cried all day, and we had to give it up. We started him again in the spring, with kids his own age, and had the same problem. However, the deeper into the season we went, the less he cried. It went from all day, to the first half of the day, to the first ten minutes after being dropped off, to stopping altogether but not interacting with the rest of the class, to interacting like all the other kids.

By the time summer break came, we didn't want it to end, because he was doing so well and we were worried about a setback. Well, fall came around, and sure enough we had a setback. He'd cry the entire time he was in class. It took from September almost to November, but his crying grew less and less frequent, until he stopped altogether again. Now, he not only doesn't cry, but excitedly runs to his teacher at the beginning of the day to engage her ("Ms. Debbie, I went to the apple orchard!").

With us, it was purely separation anxiety, which we believe was made worse by his language issues. Put plainly, he knows he can't communicate well with other 3 year olds, or even adults that are strangers and don't know the tricks to making sure he understands. He knows that the people who understand him most and who he can understand most are his parents. So, he gets anxious when being left alone with strange adults and other kids without his communication lifeline - his parents. I bet that's what your child is going through. Having to leave his mom and take a bus probably adds to the tension. We don't have to deal with that. We drive him a couple miles to school.

The bottom line is you have to stick with it. It appears to be separation anxiety made worse by poor communication skills, and the only cure is to separate and let him get used to it, while giving the teachers the tools they need to be that lifeline for him when you're not there.

Our son's language therapist recommended certain things that helped in the past, but aren't necessary anymore. The most beneficial was to have a poster board with pictures of what he has to do each day at school. The first picture is being dropped off, the second is the project, the third is circle time, the fourth is snack, and the fifth is mommy picking him up. Before each task, the teacher should have him put the appropriate picture on the board. When all pictures are on the board, he knows mommy is coming. He will know what steps he has to take in order for school to be over and mommy to come pick him up. This teaches him the structure of his day, and lessens anxiety significantly.

The other recommendations are just to make sure the teacher knows to lower herself to his level when talking to him, use appropriate gestures, keep things short and sweet, stress words like "do you WANT the BALL?", etc.

I hope this helps. Best of luck.

Answer 3

This is a pretty normal phase for most kids. I would definitly try to rule out any problems by checking the teacher and bus driver to make sure nothing is happening to your kid. Even sometimes a small thing such as getting pinched on the bus can make the child associate it with something negative. But more likely it is just a phase of not wanting to ride the bus. Where I live some of the kids are on the bus way too long because of the routes etc. and that can make kids hate the bus also. But if you can rule out any problems at school and on the bus then I would just deal with a phase that they will outgrow if you don't give them too much attention for crying etc.

Answer 4

Firstly, your child might have self-esteem problems which I would guess are the major cause of the problem your having. He probably does not feel comfortable in the company of the people at the preschool. A lot of children have the same problem, and it is not just because of his speech impediment. Another possibility is that something happened at school, maybe another child has been teasing him, or bullying him. Most of the time, children will not be comfortable telling their parents about bullys or being teased, so you need to find a way to get the child into a comfortable situation, maybe while he is playing with his toys, then you should ask leading questions about why he doesnt want to go to school, do not ask him straight out. Ask him questions like, "tell me about your friends at school" . maybe in this way you could figure it out.

Answer 5

The school district program is specifically designed to meet his needs. You say his current preschool does nothing for him. Of course you should take advantage of the district program! He won't be "negatively" affected by kids with different needs! You may learn something by the experience too. Like not to be concerned when he is around children with "disorders." What sort of disorders do you expect the district preschool to address? Blind children? Deaf children? Children in wheelchairs? How will this cause any negativity? He will learn others are different, which is good! My son went to public preschool for a speech problem, starting when he was 3. All the kids in his class had speech problems, some due to ear infections, some for a physical problem forming words, my son for who knows what. The point is, they didn't throw him in with blind kids, or kids with cerebral palsy. He was with the kids that needed speech therapy! He thought it was a regular preschool until years later! They did regular preschool things. They did fun crafts, played outside. They also did speech related exercises, like blowing cotton balls across the table to each other, ala ping-pong. He went from me, his mom, not understanding him, to perfect speech within a few years. The teachers are trained speech therapists. This is what your son needs! A friend had a daughter who talked about like my son. When the school suggested speech therapy she pulled her daughter out and never went back, saying she would grow out of it on her own. She didn't. The last time I heard her talk (They moved) she was in middle school and still had a speech impediment. I have other friends who speak several languages in the home, and the children learn both, no confusion or pronunciation problems. It is suggested that families who speak more than one language have one parent use one language with the child, the other parent the other. They learn both. It is appalling that you feel your son would be scarred or something by contact with disabled children. You need to visit the district classrooms and see for yourself! These same children will be in the classroom with him when he starts school anyway!

Answer 6

Drop by the school regularly, see if you can pin point why he is crying, talk to the school transportation department. Get involved and find out why he is unhappy when he gets home, Maybe if you would drive him to school for a whole week you could get an idea if it has to do with the school bus.
Don't put it on the back burner, find out what is making him so upset.

FYI: if you have health insurance talk to your physician to get your child to also go to speech therapy sessions usually an hour long. I had my son in special ed and the speech therapist and with both it helped so much and improved his speech in just a few months.

Answer 7

I would go to school and observe.There may be things going on that the teacher doesn't see.I have always gone to observe a couple of times each school year because my son's expressive language was limited.One year when I went to observe,a little boy was head-butting the other kids whenever the teacher had her back to the class to write on the blackboard.She also wrote everything down in a daily notebook that was sent home in my son's backpack but she was unaware of what was going on until I told her!
It could also be something going on in the bus.If at all possible,I would try taking your son to school and see if he stops complaining about going.Good luck.

Answer 8

Both of my girls (now 8 and 14) did the same thing when they were 3. When I dropped them off at daycare they would cry and cling, say they felt sick...or whatever. Once inside the classroom, they would quickly become interested in whatever was going on around them and I was a distant memory until I picked them up later.

Give your child a picture of you to keep with him when he goes to school.

Also, be sure to keep your emotions in check. If you look upset, then your child will play into that. Encourage him to be excited about school...remind him about his friends, the toys, games, snack...or whatever else happens there. Remind him that you will be excited to see him again when he returns home.

Get him on the bus, wave good bye, turn around, and head inside. The longer that his "send off" lasts, the more tears and anxiety he will have.

If you are concerned about what is going on at school...stop by and take a look. Do NOT let your son know you are going to his school and do NOT let him see you. Being that his classroom is a special education room, there should be an observation room with mirrored glass. If that is not available t his school, arrange to observe him when he is playing outside and you can stand inside and watch him through a window.

He will outgrow his clinginess by the time he is 4 years old.

Answer 9

You know it could just be as simple as Separation Anxiety. My son does this almost everyday when I drop him off at his Early Childhood Class. My son is 3 and he has Mild to Moderate Autism. He loves school and its clear by the way he acts when I drop in early before he is let out. If you feel something is wrong maybe you should drop in and observe the class. You do not have to call ahead and let them know. Just go to the school sign in at the office and go right to the class. If the teachers have issues with you just dropping in then maybe something is going on and you need to look into it a little more.

Jessica

Answer 10

He just may not be ready to seperate from momma yet.My friends little boy,had a really hard time seperating from his mom,and didn1t want to go to special ed perschool either.It took time,finally,he let go,and is happy to go to school.On the other hand,speech problems and problems with social interaction can be signs of autism or aspergers.We don`t have enough information to say that for sure,but autism and aspergers are very common these days.

Answer 11

My son did this all last yr at 3 too. He liked school once he got there. He just hated being on the bus for an hr. He didnt want to leave home which was his comfort zone..