Does calling husband names mixed with profanity over twenty years affect the relationship?

Question

Wife says all women have the right to call their husbands names and that it will have no affect on the relationships
Husband over this same time period as used sheer not to respond will and maturity not to respond with names about her
She recently told her doctor that her husband has never called her a name since shes knowm him.
He says that although he doesnt show it during her argumentative outburst, it still has an affect on him

wife says that thats his fault if he doesnt call names
He says children call names and have to be taughtnot to do so by responsible parents
She says wifes autamaticall call their huband terrible names and its expected in a relationship/ He has asked her to stop to no avail
Do you ladies agree that she is right whether married or just boyfriend and girlfriend over 20 years. Shes close to fifty
hes older. i said the husband is right
She said naturally ill agree with the husband because im a man
I said no one should call each other names .

She beleives a man should be able to take it like a man
He says although i dont show it on my face its slowly destroying mour marriage Then she wonders why this doesnt happen anymore and why dont you want to ride alone in the car with me
He said he never tell her that in a car he trapped to hear the screaming and since hes driving he cant walk away.
I said it affects any relationship

Answer 1

verbal abuse hurts just as bad as physical abuse so yes name calling over any period of time can definitely hurt a relationship - just because you are married doesn't give you the right to treat someone badly

Answer 2

A person, man or woman, married or not, should never resort to name calling or involve personalities in an argument. Name calling hurts the other person. Whatever hurtful words are used are never forgotten and cannot be taken back. This is especially true with two people who are in a relationship.

Also, whenever two people have an an argument (and we all have them) each should stick to the issue at hand and not get into whatever has happened in the past. It has no bearing on the current problem.

And no, ALL wives do NOT call their husbands terrible names. This is a lame excuse on her part to assume that this is true. It isn't her "right" to call him names. She is immature, cruel and very much in the wrong. Please feel free to pass my posting on to her if you wish.

Married 20 years

Answer 3

Was anyone else ever taught to "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you"? No one, male or female, should throw verbal assaults at their spouse. I can get total strangers to berate me...This is just being mean. This surely has a negative affect on any relationship, plus this woman is old enough to be able to control herself. Verbal abuse can be more painful than all the violent physical abuse in the world. Once you say something, it can never be taken back...even if you didn't mean it at the time. You're right on this one!

Answer 4

She is wrong, a wife does not have the right to call her husband names! How would she like it if he did the same to her?
Any type of hateful or negative continuous name calling is abuse. And does take its toll on the people and relationship.

Answer 5

Of course it has an effect on the guy! why wouldn't it.

No one in a relationship should have to get that from someone who loves them. Of course it is all situational too. My wife has been pissed at me in the past, never really called me anything terrible, but has hurt my feelings. She always realizes this in the end and serioualy appologized for ever doing that.

Answer 6

That sounds a lot like abuse to me. It is certainly not an inherent right of the wife or husband to call their spouse horrible names. The fact that he has accepted it for 20 years is fairly amazing, and he is exhibiting classic abuse symptom. The wife sounds very immature and very trashy.

Answer 7

The wife is making excuses for her immature habits. Calling names and using profanity is intended to hurt someone. I don't call my husband names. If we disagree about something, I'll just tell him that each of us is allowed to have their own opinion; that each of us is right from our point of view.

This woman needs some anger management classes. At her age, she should be wise enough to know how immature and irresponsible her actions are.

Answer 8

Nobody has the right to call anyone names whether male or female. I do not know where she got her book of rules but it is obvious she made it all up to fit to her advantage. If you put up with the name calling then it is all your fault for doing so. People treat you the way you allow them to treat you. Tell her to shove her book of rules out the window or you are gone.

Answer 9

no it is not alright to call husband or wife's names it is terrible to think that someone could think that is OK ,it is mental and verbal abuse ,when you make someone feel less about themselves.and over the years the person could have very little selfasteam or could retaliate in a unpositive way

Answer 10

Verbal abuse in any form for whatever reason is never acceptable. Especially in relationships or marriage.