Why is it so hard for people to understand that YES, it is wrong to cheat on your spouse?

Question

And, YES, it is wrong to have an affair with someone who is married?

I know I've asked this before, but I still just don't understand why some people just don't get it!!!

Answer 1

I dont know - I am as stunned on that one as you are..
When you get married, its supposed to be because you love the person and want to stay with them for the rest of your life - you say vows and they are supposed to have meaning,but people just take it too light heartadly anymore..
and yes it is very wrong to have an affair with a married person, I agree
instead of staying with the marrage and working to fix the problem people just take the easy way out..
it is morally wrong,but in todays society people just dont get it.

Answer 2

Thinking..It is wrong to you in your opinion. Can someone else not have another opinion different from yours? Are you basing it wrong on the bible?

OK Let me tell you from a cheaters point of view.. I was married to a man for 10 years during that time things just got to be routine. (dull in the bedroom) there was no passion anymore. We were two people living in the same household going in two different directions. We were just going through the motions. I needed affection from him and understanding. I needed communication without being judged. I was not getting that at home. He was not getting it from me either so this was in no way one sided. We had just lost one another somewhere after children were born. I met someone who was going through the same things. We could have communication, affection, and all the things we were both missing in our marriages. I am a firm believer that if you don't take care of your business at home someone else will. When I first got married I was dead set against cheating never thought I would do it. But it did happen. Do I see it as wrong? Yes it is wrong in the eyes of Christians, but as long as two consenting adults agree and it hurts no one and no one finds out it is not really hurting anyone. And, I know all about STDs and all that. There are ways to prevent that. I'm 30 not 16. That may seem to you like a lame excuse but it is how I feel. You have no right to judge anyone by there actions unless you are in there shoes. You have no idea what a person may be going through or need at that time in there life.

Answer 3

I am very monogamous, so it's not like I want to cheat on my wife or anything. Cheating just screws things up -- things get more complicated than you figured. That said, "wrong" is a value judgment. Philosophically, and without all the emotional baggage attached, it is wrong not to taste all the fruits your short life offers you. It's like eating mashed potatoes and nothing else for the rest of your life because your belief system thinks it's wrong to eat anything else. It's only wrong because the parties to the cheating have needs. Selfish needs. The marriage thing is like a more sophisticated, and legal, form of "going steady" rings. With this ring I do promise not to cheat on you. Might as well draw up a legal promissory note. Same idea, considering the financial consequences of a failed marriage. Anyway, I blab a lot. I'm just trying to suggest you think outside of the box to find an answer to your question. That is, of course, unless you already have the answer and are looking for confirmation.

Answer 4

I can see why you feel that way. But also look at it from another angle. Not saying your like this in your relationship. But i have read tons of women on here saying after having a child or after being married even a year they dont' feel or like sex anymore and they tell there husband NO.

What is a man to do.. Tell me that. Same goes for women how would we women like it if the husbands come home and say I'm not going to have sex anymore for the rest of our marriage great now deal with it.

Women sure still want the roof over there head the 2 cars parked in the driveway the vacations and anything else a man can pay for but they dont' want to share there love emotionally and intimately. Now I ask do you think thats fair to either of the sexes I would say not.

And don't kid yourself thinking its a small minority out there . Tons of women on here seem not to like it nor even want to do it let alone try something new.

Answer 5

Because some people has the incapacity to keep in mind and heart that marriage is sacred and some cheaters has unmet physical and/or emotional needs. At the same time, they don't want to leave the poor spouse because of the fear of the emotional effects of the separation to the children and to the spouse herself. The cheater wants to fulfill his needs and at the same time keep the family whole as much as possible.

Answer 6

Some people make that mistake of cheating and some have the LOVE and understanding to get over it, thru it, whatever.

But YES, IT IS WRONG, in whatever fashion it happens.

Why its wrong..IN MY OPINION..(PROLLY OTHERS AS WELL, I DON'T WANT TO SPEAK FOR ANYONE ELSE)

First off, VOWS.."TO FORSAKE ALL OTHERS"...
FORSAKE MEANS: you gave up your right to be with anyone except your marital partner!!

For those of us that believe in GOD, it is in the commandments "THOU SHALT NOT COVET ANOTHER MANS WIFE" (this includes g/f's b/f's, etc), this means you can't sleep with the neighborhood, or an EX, you are not even suppossed to look at another person with the mind set of WANTING to be with them in a sexual manner.

Morals...WELL, some just don't care or have these!!

Answer 7

People cheat because they have no feelings at all about the other people who they are hurting. Some people just get bored with the same person. But why be with somebody if you know that you can't be faithful? Why hurt people?

Answer 8

You won't like my answer. Because WE don't treat cheating as a big deal. Yes, it's YOUR fault. And MINE. Do you treat every person that cheats as scum? You've never had a friend or family member that cheated, yet remained friends? You've disowned EVERY family member that cheated? You treat every person that has cheated as a scummy subhuman? You've never been aware of a person that is cheating, yet remained silent? You've never had a married guy try to come on to you- and not told his wife? People cheat, because as a society, we show that cheating is OK.

Answer 9

it may be hard for some people to see it because they aren't the ones being hurt. some people are incapable of emotionally being responsible or worthy of trust. people don't care about others feelings, selfish and having no conscience or belief in god. some people won't listen to their conscience, they listen to the wrong people for advice. much of it depends on how a person grew up and what they were exposed to, if their parents openly cheated they may not feel its wrong.

Answer 10

When we're in "love" we're empowered to do what it takes to keep ourselves in that position making us.....selfish and weak to willpower.

I don't know if you've been in this situation but I don't think you should be judging those who've been in this situation unless you've been in it. Of course you're entitled to your opinion but it's very difficult to understand unless you've been involved in a situation as such.

It is wrong. It is wrong to cheat on your spouse. But so is it wrong to kill, steal, cheat, and so many other things out there. If it were easy to understand why we do all those other cruel things then you would have an answer to your controversial question. There are no infinite answers to those perplexing questions so the same reasoning applies to your question.