polyamory & polygamy?

Question

What do you think about polyamory?

I am not polyamorous, but I respect that some people are, and that's totally fine with me. But I do have some reservations, and it's making me feel like a bigot.

Again, I respect that some people are polyamorous, and while I'm ok with people having polyamorous relationships, I don't think that there should be polygamy. This makes me feel like a bigot because the reasons I use are similar to the reasons that people use to oppose gay marriage... and I definitely believe that gays should be allowed to marry.

Basically, I do not think that polygamy should be legal because it would make legal proceedings very difficult, and a large conglomeration of people who are all married to each other could make a lot of problems. (If there are four people who are married to each other and one is ill, how do the other three share power of attorney?)

Part of me wants to be accepting, because almost everyone at my LGBTQ group is and I feel like I'm missing some

big equality thing... like I'm being a huge jerk and denying people equality. But on the other hand, I really don't think that polygamy would be a good idea, even though I don't have any huge qualms about polyamory.

So am I being a bigot? Should I be more poly-accepting?

Answer 1

Personally I feel the same way... Polyamory is a mutual thing... so in my opinion it is okay... polygamy is centered on one person marrying many others generally one man taking many wives... there is nothing mutual about it... to me its very sexist and using women as property... Am I a bigot? I am transsexual myself... and to me if this wretched curse that has befallen me at birth... is worth ANYTHING... it has taught me to be accepting and tolerating of others... yet polygamy strikes me as a moral wrong... and so I cannot take a stance any less than the "love the sinner hate the sin" motto of many people who choose to look down on us LBGTQandsoforth people... Perhaps I too am too set in my ways... it will take a lot for me to change my veiw of polygamy frankly... but like I said... this damned and wretched existance of gender dysphoria has to be good for SOMETHING

edit: cheers for eliminating bigotry within ourselves... the greatest step to fighting the bigotry around us!!!

Answer 2

You're not a bigot but you are getting hung up on things that are not such a big deal. The legal stuff can always be worked out. The fact that it may seem difficult shouldn't stop people from loving whom they love.

As for the... ummm... interesting definitions of Polyamory here... well I suppose there are no hard rules but Polyamory is a way of defining a relationship that involves more than 2 people. The idea of a "main" husband or wife is more in line with a traditional Polygamous culture like the mormons... where one person is set above the others in the relationship. (Personally I'm not so cool with that idea but whatever makes you happy...)

Polyamory is more of a partnership where each partner loves and supports all of the others in the group (3 or more) the way most of us are used to loving and supporting ONE other person. In my experience this still includes the same expectations of trust and fidelity. The only real difference is the number of people involved.

Some people feel that this somehow diminishes or divides the love you have to give. I, on the other hand believe that it in fact MULTIPLIES the love you have to give... as well as the love you receive.

In the context of a Poly marriage... well it only makes sense that having 3 or more people to share the housework, bring home a paycheck, take care of the kids etc.. is better for everyone.

Unfortunately many people are too posessive to even consider this type of relationship as a possibility.

Answer 3

well I will answer both questions on this page....yes poly(anything) comes from math....now onto the question at hand. The power of attorney wouldn't necessarily be "shared" they could set up a living will or some other legal document that would say who has power of attorney. Also, in polyamorous relationships, there is usually a pecking order. There is usually a "main" wife, and then other wives under her, who only get the guy like on weekends or whatever, and same for the reverse, woman with several husbands has a main husband and subserviant husbands, and the "main" one in either case would probly get power of attorney, or take care of any other concerns of the group along with the husband or wife in question. So I don't think legal reasons are the reason to possibly oppose such relationships, they are like any other relationship, they figure stuff out amongst themselves.

Answer 4

What do you mean with polyamory ?I think poly is many and amory is lover?I look in the dictionary there is no polyamory but there is polyandry(for woman) as the opposite of polygamy (for man).In islamic teaching polygamy is allowed by Allah the only one God for man who married to the maximum 4 wives.But God gave its qualification that the man should treat fairly all of his wives and has enough income for 4 households.God also spoke in the Qur'an that hardly no man can treat fairly all of his wives.So it is better to have only one wife..God spoke in the Qur'an that God created man for woman and created woman for man.They should love each other.God hates lesbianism and homoism because it is again
st the God's law said above.Gays and lesbians have mental illness,so their behaviours and attitudes like the opposite gender..Between man and man can not get married.
Polyandry where a woman has more than one husband is not allowed by God too.,because it is against with God's law.
Polyamory is prohibited too by God if it is interpreted as freesex.God allow man and woman get married in the formal marriage which should be announced ,witnessed by both parents at least 2 other witnesses and take an oath in front of official officer anf the would be husband should give the wedding present as agreed by both.The man and woman who have been married is not allowed to have other lovers.
Adultery and fornication are prohibited as spoken by God in the Qur'an.Replacing love partners oftenly without formal married is not allowed and it will bring a HIV and AIDs diseases.

Answer 5

It would certainly prove an interesting situation. I have been with two other people at one time, and still love them both. I am still with one of them, and the other is visiting (yay!). We would all love to be married to each other. Simply put, you would have to choose one person to have power of attorney. Each would have to choose some one that held that power. Wills would have to be very specifically written.

The interesting part would be... what if one wants a divorce?

your perfectly fine, do not worry about it. You are not being a bigot by any meaning of the word.

Answer 6

I don't know if it makes you a bigot. You seemed to be alright with those who are in multiple loving relationships with others, but it does seem you take issue with the legal complications of it, and possibly you are bothered by it because you'll feel it will muddy up the possibility of monogamous same-sex relationships???

Answer 7

2 questions...what does polyamory & polygamy mean?

are u talking about math ? :)...oh i think u r




edit: lol dont be mean to me carrie ;)