What are some reasons other that cheating & abuse that you would consider getting a divorce?

Question

How long would you let it go on before you went through w/ it?

I should have asked how long would you try to fix it before you finally gave up?

Answer 1

Bad relationship with my children.

Answer 2

Any criminal offense, money mismanagement, cheating....even if it only on the net, pornography abuse, pedophiles, cross-dressing, drug and alcohol abuse, liars (about anything). I tolerate nothing. I give what I expect to get back. If I am pulling my weight.....I do not tolerate anything less. I'm 50 years old. Been through a few bad relationships. Found that it is a waste of time and love to let bad stuff go on with hope that it will change. I move on. There are some wonderful people in the world. I am not wasting my time, energy, and ability to love on those who do not appreciate it or know how to give it.

Answer 3

Hey Big M,
This is an issue that you have to be able to fix with him. If he is unwilling to help out on his end then there is nothing else that you can do but to give up on your end. If you have asked him to go to counseling, asked him for more time for you and the kids, asked him to come straight home from work and not go out to the bar every night and none of it is working then you have to decide if you are ready to throw in the towel and call it quits. Sometimes when faced with losing the ones that we love we finally wake up. Sometimes not though. You are the only one that will know when your meter is full of crap and you can't take anymore. If you have tried all of those other things and nothing has worked then you know that it will not get better and your meter will continue to fill up. How long are you willing to live miserable? When are you going to allow yourself to start to live happy again? I know that you truly believe in the sanctity of your marriage but if you and he are unhappy then that will filter down to the kids and they will start to act out because of the confusion in your life. This one isn't just about how much you can take it is about the kids too and how much they have to see you go through and how unhappy they are because you aren't happy either. You already know the answer to this one in your heart and you will do what is best for you and your kids.

Much love
Michele

Answer 4

Sweetheart, emotional infidelity is real. If he's not giving you what you need emotionally or physically, I say kick him out of your life. Do you not see that he's the lucky one. If he truly loved you, you would not be on here, now. You need some attention and he is not going to give you any. I think he is an idiot! Do you not think you can do better? Baby, you can. You're the only person in the relationship!!! He isn't on here looking for help to resolve the problems you two have!! Men prefer women who are confident and you sound as if he has taken your confidence. We single guys are out here looking to treat a woman right............ If you feel you need to divorce him than just do it.....

Answer 5

I don't know how long I would wait to be done with a marriage I suppose until I knew in my heart there was no hope.

I would consider divorce for neglect and loneliness if severe enough....I am a person too and somethings need to be had in marriage such as affection and connection in other than sexual ways....

Answer 6

poor money management


most divorces end over money, not cheating or abuse
in fact most abusees ( the victims ) have low self esteem and thus stay inside of a marriage because they fear being alone and to them an abusive relationship is better than none

as for time line
1st abuse - divorce immediately, it never gets better, there is no 2nd chance with it
1st cheating - divorce immediately, there is a huge fundamental flaw with the person if they cannot stay faithful to you, there is no 2nd chance and you cannot trust any amount of counseling

the problem is women do not like to be the bad guy and just divorce right away, so they to try to work things out, which is always there biggest mistake

susbstance abuse - pick you choice of drug here, people like that lakc self love and have low to no self esteem

emo's - those who are emotionally messed up, baggage should not be your problem, you need a person who is emotionally healthy

weight issue- morbids are not marriage candidates for more than one reason, low self esteem, health issues etc..

Answer 7

No need in trying to get ur spouse to compromise..if it has got to this point.. !!!!
I would just ... sit down.. and write out my 10 TOP demands..of what expected..... out of my marriage..
1.
2.
3.-10.
then another list.. things that are unacceptable..
1.
2,
3.-10.

You need to sit for a couple of days.. and think on this.. what are the top 10 things YOU.. want.. and 10 things YOU don't want?????/

and tell him u are very unhappy.. and if these demands are not met.. U are going to go away.. if he wants u to stay.. he will say .. sure, honey..
and then there needs to be a penalty.. in case he screws up.. Example: like u are leaving the first week w/o the kids.. and he has to take care of them,,, get them to school .. feed them, while u go stay w/ family friends.. and find a apt.. and come back for the kids.. be sure this is in writing.. and he signs it..
if u ever get to court it will come in handle..
The main thing is don't over load Ur mouth.. if u say something mean it.. if u say u are gonna do something... then DO IT.... !! or u have to come home to him and eat crow !! him...

Answer 8

I walked out of my first marriage because of his insane jealousy of anything or anyone who took my attention from him for even a minute. That plus his belief that a marriage was not a partnership, but rather the wife is suppose to do everything while the husband sits on his butt. We tried for another year after I knew I wanted out.

Answer 9

Drugs

Answer 10

drugs and alcohol addictions are a deal breaker- these substances alter a persons perception of reality and allow them to do other things such as cheat or lie or steal, all of the above behaviors that I cannot stand or live with.

Answer 11

That would depend on whether or not the my husband was willing to work at it. If he refused to even try, would not go for couseling, and otherwise showed that it didn't matter to him, then I think I would consider it sooner rather than later.