i had a ex and he cheated with a co/worker.
i remarried based on the fact that i was very open and this new guy told me cheating is something he would never do.well i dont know if he has but i found out that he was telling me he was working over time and realy he was going out with raunchy co/workers until late in the night.
he left me a year ago but came back 3months later.he is doing it again talking to raunchy girls at work.
my question is how do i heal when he is doing these things still.iwant out but have nowhere to turn.i want to heal is there hope for me.can i get help somewhere for being insecure.i want to laugh and love again.
2007-11-06 08:42:31 · 14 answers · asked by STALKER BLOCK 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Thanks everyone !
he has a way of turning the tables on me and i end up saying sorry or lets make up.
the women in me feels dead the mother in me keeps her alive that is a sooooo lonely place for me.
2007-11-06 08:55:08 · update #1
You're being manipulated. Stand up for yourself and tell this weasel you're not going to play his childish games anymore. Once you've asserted yourself, you'll begin to feel better. The weight will be off your shoulders and you'll be able to revel in the inner strength you have found. Take back your life immediately.
2007-11-07 10:00:57 · answer #1 · answered by rtanys 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
lonely, you need to leave him and start a new life, because it seems like he does not respect you. It is very hard to start trusting again and feeling secure about yourself once you go thru something like what you are going. I went thru something like that myself and in my marriage I had a lot of trouble learning to trust and we even separated and almost lost the person I love. Thank God we are back together and happier than ever. We have a lot of plans and I have learned to trust, every now and then I still have my doubts, but I keep on telling myself that I don't want to loose him. You need time to heal in order to keep on. Don't worry about the future too much, worry about what you have right now and try to deal with it the best that you can. The future will come, no matter what, but what the future will bring will only depend on what you are doing in the present. I wish you the best and hope that you can learn to laugh and love again.
2007-11-06 16:50:16 · answer #2 · answered by why ask 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You have to leave him. He probably knows that you are insecure and he will use it and continue to go out. There is no reason why you should stay with him or consider staing with him. Go out and meet ne people, you will find someone, if not, they will find you. Healing takes a lot of time, you just have to find things to do to move on and get your mind off the situation. Have you confronted about the situation? This can also help speed the healing process up a bit.
2007-11-06 16:54:34 · answer #3 · answered by dvspnoy17 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Unfortunately, the problem is not him, it is you, hon. Where is your self esteem??? He can't come back, unless you allow it, and frankly, I'd sleep under a bridge before I would share a bed with a cheater....
If you don't have an education, get one, and learn to support yourself... then, hon, YOU call the shots, no one else does...And next time, don't be in such a rush to marry without checking the dude out....
2007-11-06 16:53:20 · answer #4 · answered by April 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
first, you need to find yourself and learn to love yourself first. that is going to take awhile. Take a break from men, think about what you want in a man then once you start dating again, do not settle for less. If a man does meet your standards, kick his azz to the curb and find a new one. You need to find a swagger and confidence in yourself, so you dont fall for these fast talking men. If you dont love yourself first how can a man love you and respect you.
2007-11-06 17:01:38 · answer #5 · answered by Tax Man 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
if you want to laugh and love again just do it and dont obsess so much. get more excercize. not that i myself would do this, but i hear it works. and for petes sake, if you are with someone who is going to raunchy places with raunchy people you might want to either go with him or quit hanging around with raunchy people.
2007-11-06 17:08:47 · answer #6 · answered by jaded 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Leave him. It will take time, but you will bounce back. Insecurity will go away once you realize that you are someone worth being honest for; maybe work on time for yourself to find that confidence.
2007-11-06 17:17:15 · answer #7 · answered by Xicanista 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do you love him? No? Leave him! It's not as bad as it sounds! There will be someone out there for you that suits you better, that WANTS to be with you and won't take you for granted like that.
2007-11-06 16:52:12 · answer #8 · answered by haveyoueversleptoutside 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ask your self why would you want someone that cheated on you there are thousands of good healthy guys that would like you>
2007-11-06 16:57:56 · answer #9 · answered by 45 auto 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
it is hard but necessary for you to leave him. if you are young now you will be kicking yourself when you are in your thirty's if you stay with this dork..... Don't waste your youth on this d*** he**d. Soon you will be wrinkled and your options will be much more limited....Get out now, you'll thank me when your older. There are so many guys out there...RUN, RUN, RUN...
2007-11-06 16:51:21 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋