i have asked my husband to move out, we dont have an abusive relationship or anything, but we just don't fit anymore. I have been unhappy for quite some time and have talked to him about the way I feel. He won't move out, I dont want to uproot my child, but also do not want to get the law involved. I have not filed for divorce yet, I would just like time to be myself without him around. How can I get him to understand?
2007-11-06 05:18:33 · 19 answers · asked by desperate for answers 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You should move out, not wanting to "uproot" your child is not a good reason to stay, besides change is good.
2007-11-06 05:23:07 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 1⤋
There is no reason why he should. You are not serious about divorcing or you would have filed. Up rooting the child sounds like an excuse to have your way. If he wanted time alone you wouldnt move out either. you cant even come up with a good reason why you want to separate. If I were your husband I would file just get away from your wining.
Grampa B
2007-11-06 13:28:46 · answer #2 · answered by Grampa B 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Is his name on the mortgage or the title to the house? If it is then he doesn't have to go anywhere! If you don't want to be with him and just want to be "yourself" then you move out. You say that you don't want to uproot your child, well guess what.... That is what divorce is so get used to it. You are confused. Listen what you are asking... "I'm not happy, but not sure I want a divorce, and I need some time. Will you please leave your home so I can be happy?" I say screw off!!
2007-11-06 13:26:27 · answer #3 · answered by cdaniels3106 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
sounds like this is the time to sell the house and split the profit.
you don't want to be with him anymore, that's ok, but you need to look at it from all angles. it's not just about you.
why should he leave? why can't he stay and keep the kid? i mean, i feel like you just think he can walk away and no feel a thing. what if he still loves you? what if he doesn't want to leave?
you guys need to communicate and come to a mutual agreement about things. you're each going to have to give and take. you're going to ahve to figure out what you're willing to give up in order for him to move out and leave you with the house.
my recommendation:
sell the house
start off new somewhere else
your kid will be ok
share the kid with the dad...kids need both parents.
be kind to each other and respect each other through this whole thing.
take car.e
2007-11-06 13:26:04 · answer #4 · answered by joey322 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you live in the US and by ‘getting the law involved’ you mean calling the police, you’ll be wasting your time. If his name is on the lease/mortgage, then it’s his home too, and he has just as much right to be there as you do, unless a judge orders otherwise (for example, if you file for divorce/legal separation and request temporary residency of the home be awarded to you--which may or may not be depending on many factors such as rather or not you can afford to maintain the payments on your income).
Even if his name is not on the lease/mortgage, he’s now established residency and therefore, you can’t force him to move without legally evicting him.
So, the answer is if he refuses to move, then you move, or you go to court.
2007-11-06 13:54:45 · answer #5 · answered by kp 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You will not get him to understand. You two are married so unless you are willing to lie you have no legal options for forcing him out.
Sometimes it takes longer for one partner to realize the marriage is over. Stop trying to convince him that he should move out and just coexist for a while with no marital activites. Trying to force him to leave puts him on the defensive. Think about how you would have felt if he had come to you 2 years ago and said I want you to move out because this just isn't working.
2007-11-06 13:28:14 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe he'd like to be himself without YOU around! I agree with most of these answers here. You want someone to leave? YOU LEAVE! Why do you have to clean his wallet out in the process? He's built that home just as much as you and is entitled to enjoy what's left of it even if you're there to make his wretched life even more miserable. The guy is probably a good father too. What's wrong, honey? Can't stand that Bob Barker has left Price is Right and you're lonesome from 10am-11am now? Is Oprah getting too boring? I'll bet that you sit on your butt and watch TV all day, then nag his ears off the moment he walks in the door.
P.S. Do what Jo28 just posted before me and you'll be seeing your child on visiting day from jail.
2007-11-06 13:31:12 · answer #7 · answered by Mike T 3 · 2⤊ 1⤋
maybe you should tell him that you want a separation to figure out what you want. i'm sure he would understand. You shouldnt say you want a divorce unless you know thats what you truly want. I think you should consider your child in this matter...is the situation that bad to the point where it absolutely cant be worked out?? I mean if he doesnt leave you should get the law involved if you have talked to him and he isnt trying to understand. good luck.
2007-11-06 13:26:05 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well darling, how can he get you to understand. Knowing how things work, your husband bought the house years ago and Now you want him to move out...how is that fair? Your husband has equal rights to the house and to the children. Your going to have to be an adult about this.
2007-11-06 13:27:16 · answer #9 · answered by Bride2Be 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You move and leave your child there. You are the one being selfish, uncaring, and cruel. Your husband is right to stand his ground, it's just as much his home as yours. If you don't want him there and don't want to uproot your child,then pack your things and go, they will do fine without you.
2007-11-06 13:29:39 · answer #10 · answered by az_mommma 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋