This gentleman I'm seeing/talking too, has an ex wife. They were together for a while. Apparently, it's obvious that he has moved on but when he caught wind of another man being romantically interested in his ex, he became jealous and admitted to me that he was upset by this. I've had a change of heart towards him, as we were discussing our future. He does seem happy with me but after seeing his reaction to that, I'm not happy. He doesn't seem to understand why I feel the way I do and feels that I'm taking it too far. And said he can't really relate to what I feel because he's not in my situation but in all honesty am I wrong for wanting to pull back or really, pull away?
2007-11-05 22:42:40 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
No you are not wrong to want to pull back. You're smart, actually. His reaction to his ex wife's new man could be an indication of something deeper. If he got jealous over that, imagine what he might do if you are friendly with a male co-worker? Or it could be an indication that he isn't really over her. And you would not want to be involved with a man whose heart belongs to someone else. Watch your step with this one.
2007-11-06 01:24:52 · answer #1 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't pull away completely, but depending on how long they've been seperated it might be worth putting the breaks on slightly, slow things down to allow him to decide if it's you he wants or if he wants to see if his wife's interested in a reconcilliation.
My x used to do this, we'd split, ususlaly cos he moved in with someone else, so I'd start dating, he'd find out & in front of his woman would go into one @ me & threaten to have the other guy "capped"
It used to p's his girly's off something chronic cos it prooved to them that he still considered me his girl.
2007-11-05 22:48:40 · answer #2 · answered by Bubbly Blonde 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't pull ~~RUN!! If you do continue in this relationship, he's going to bring all this into your relationship. He can't have a future with you if he's going to continue to live in the past. Be smart and find someone that wants to start a life with you and you alone, not remind you every day of what he left behind. His ex will be a part of your everyday life and I don't think you want to share him with her. Remember~~three's a crowd!!!
2007-11-05 22:53:14 · answer #3 · answered by Needtoknow 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The feelings don't go away completly when you get a divorce and he was being honest with you.Give him credit on that one.I'm sure it did bother him.It is only natural for him to feel like that.It will pass.Do you feel wrong for wanting to pull back?I would say give it time to see.He was honest and you both did well by communicating about this problem.
2007-11-05 22:54:06 · answer #4 · answered by lollypop 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He may have some residual feelings toward his ex, that's normal after a long term relationship.
Whether or not you should rethink the relationship depends if he's actually *moved on* and if he's committed to you.
If he is still *in-love* with her, you may have to rethink your relationship, as you will end up playing back seat.
2007-11-05 22:49:28 · answer #5 · answered by Infernal Disaster 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
REDFLAG!!!! He is NOT over his x-wife..He clearly has not had enough time to recover from the loss...Sounds like you were what he settled for since he couldn't go back to his wife..Thats why you clearly saw his strong connection to his wife as he reacted to her having another man in her life.....I would suggest a cool off period of your relationship and you should start dating other people....YES your GUT is correct!!! He's still tied emotionally to his X....
2007-11-05 23:09:12 · answer #6 · answered by Dog Rescuer 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no your not wrong to pull back and wait. if he is disturbed by his ex being with someone else, he is still in love with her and anything can happen. he hasn't completely gotten over her, sounds as if there are some unresolved things going on, that can interfere with any future relationships.
2007-11-05 22:50:04 · answer #7 · answered by jude 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would feel the same as you do... it would be good bye! I am over being in relationships that are abusive and controlling,,,and he is exhibiting signs, I find, go hand in hand with that.
2007-11-05 22:48:16 · answer #8 · answered by cheri h 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
his feeling are still their with his ex, let him talk and tell you his feelings, men are just like women they hurt too. If you want him hang in their it will get better, if you don't push on!
2007-11-05 22:50:22 · answer #9 · answered by lydia t 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋