err, this is hard but i can stay Unknown here.
i don't know what to do i'm so confused. i got my girlfriend pregnate. She is only 16 we have been sexual active for 1 year now i know we should of been doing it safe but we slipped up bad! i don't have a clue who to turn to we are stuck for help
2007-11-05 21:11:37 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
My Advice: Wrap it up next time.
Ok but seriously, in reality you only have two options.
Keep it.
Give it up for adoption.
Or abortion.
That's usually the options.
2007-11-05 21:16:26 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 4⤋
I fell pregnant at 16 too -- although it was basically straight after losing my v. lol. My then boyfriend just turned around and left.
And I can tell you, please stand up and be a man! She needs you right now -- I have no idea what you're going through right now, and it's probably scary -- I don't know, I can only guess.
A baby is such a joy really....It's being three years since then, and I've nearly finished my uni degree....so it doesn't mean your life is over at all...But it's SO hard single, with no support at all.
Your child needs you in his/her life, and so does your gf. Please stand up and show everyone what you're made of, if you turn around and walk now you won't wash the guilt away with anything ever. I'm not saying you will, I'm just hoping you won't...
Probably your best option right now would be to
1) tell your parents
2) make sure you have a job, so you're earning money and can save up
3) focus on your education, because that's very important
4) I know it's probably hard, but try to see this in a positive life -- once you hold that baby in your arms you won't regret a thing.
There's a site called standupgirl.com, you could check it out if you need any help...
2007-11-05 21:36:24 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Well, you can't undo it. So there has to be some decision-making.
She's 16. Is she ready to settle down and be a wife and mother? Most girls that age aren't. Are you ready to support a wife and child? You don't say your age, but unless you are a dirty old man, chances are you aren't ready either.
Usually the best option is to have the baby and give it up for adoption. That should be a decision both of you make, but it is really on her to make it.
Both your parents need to be advised (yeah, that is hard, but it doesn't get easier if you delay it) and all need to discuss it and support the decision to keep the baby--possibly to be raised by relatives--or give him or her up for adoption.
Get used to the idea that this is another person you two have managed to bring into the world. It's not an illness, and no joking matter.
Bet it seemed like a pretty good idea at the time. Bet it doesn't look like it was that good now. But life goes on.
Time to make the rest of the leap into adulthood and do the right thing by your girlfriend and the baby.
Good luck, and I'll keep you in my prayers.
Incidentally, it does take some courage to make a post like this. Courage is something you will need.
2007-11-05 21:26:09 · answer #3 · answered by Warren D 7 · 3⤊ 2⤋
Don't look at it as "got her pregnant".
Look at it as "I have a child coming".
You need to tell your parents immediately. Then, seek help through free clinics that offer parenting classes for teenagers and unwed parents.
You have created a life and as scary as it may be, this can also be the most wonderful thing to ever happen to you.
You need to stay in school, and if possible, get an after-school job. Start saving money.
Learn all about pregnancy so that you will understand what she is going through, both physically and emotionally.
Good luck to you and your girlfriend. It's going to be difficult, but remember to LOVE YOUR BABY and the baby's mama.
2007-11-05 21:20:13 · answer #4 · answered by equal_opposites 5 · 3⤊ 1⤋
Well, firstly, congratulations, you are going to be a father. Now you know that having sex while still children can lead to pregnancy.
She's going to need your support, so stay by her side, love her, care for her. After all, you loved her enough to have sex with her, right? She's going to need prenatal care, you can help out by joining her for her appointments, help her keep the little one safe/healthy.
Good luck to the both of you. Talk to your parents, it's time for a huge support system.
2007-11-06 00:57:29 · answer #5 · answered by AV 6 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Talk to your girlfriend about how you feel. Offer your opinions on whether you want to keep the baby or not but most importantly do not alienate her or treat her badly. What you say to her will probably have an impact on what she decides to do, so remember to support each other. She may want to keep the baby and you may not so you might have to agree to disagree but if she chooses to have the baby, don't abandon it. You made the choice to have sex with her so you must take on the consequences.
2007-11-05 21:21:47 · answer #6 · answered by spanky_da_munkey 2 · 2⤊ 1⤋
You have only one real choice-ask some grownups for help. If she was older I'd say suck it up and support whatever she decides, but she isn't even a mature 16 if she couldn't avoid this happening-and you are not mature enough to help her, for the same reason.
Get at least her parents involved so she can do what's necessary to keep from ruining her life.
2007-11-05 21:23:03 · answer #7 · answered by barbara 7 · 1⤊ 2⤋
Well at least you are accepting your mistake...now it's all about owning up to it and understanding that it's about another life more important than your own (a child younger than yourself). I wouldn't recommend raising it yourself since I myself am 29 and planned for our son and still spend many nights trying to figure everything out. There are many couples who can't have children who would love to have a child...just consider that before considering abortion. That's all I can offer you. I wish you both the best and hope you have the proper family structure to help you decide.
2007-11-05 21:19:33 · answer #8 · answered by chrissy757 5 · 2⤊ 2⤋
the best thing that you can do is...give support and always be on the side of your girlfriend and specially with your baby that soon be come out..it was happen to me too..but my boyfriend was a big help because he was beside me till the end when the baby come out...good luck
2007-11-06 00:25:01 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 1⤋
16 is really young to be having a child, so you both need to decide what is going to happen - whether she has it and you guys either keep it, or adopt it out, or she has an abortion.
One thing you don't want to be doing is running out on the problem and leaving her with the mess - as the old saying goes, it takes two to tango :)
2007-11-05 21:21:47 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 3⤋
i think u shud accept it as a reality now, both of u talk 2 ur parents,n see what they say about that,
most important stay with her,give her comfort,she's also confused as u r.
good luck!!!
2007-11-05 21:23:09 · answer #11 · answered by G.Rose 3 · 3⤊ 1⤋