My wife won't have sex with me, what do I do?

Question

Should I cheat?

I have tried everything else. We get along fine and we do fooool around,we just dont have intercourse, for about two years now.

I think I need a girlfriend.What do you think?

Sidenote: I can definetly get it from elsewhere if I want too , I am just trying to be good, but really it's getting hard, no pun intended.

Answer 1

If you want permission to cheat, don't look for it on here. You need to talk to her.

And if this is a joke, it's not funny.

Answer 2

Don't cheat...yet. Let's look at what's happening here. You fool around and toss the ball but you don't pass the goal line. There are a many number of reasons this could be happening. First of all, you are a good man; you are looking for answers before you act. Second, your wife is still attracted to YOU. (You said you fool around.) Wives just don't stop having sex with their husbands, it's as simple as that. SOMETHING happened. The majority of the time I hear this it has nothing to do with the husband and everything to do with the wife's self esteem. (She's willing to do everything, save what she has to take her clothes off and be vulnerable for.) I'm assuming that you've already tried the flowers and candy, talking, begging, etc. While women are emotional/mental, men are visual/physical. And women know this. There's something else going on here besides her just not giving it up. Sex is a very important component of the marriage and believe me, she knows this. Just as you heard HER biological clock keeping her awake at night and the pressure she was under to get married in the first place, before you married her. You need to get some counseling for the both of you before you jump into something that will not only change the chemistry of your marriage but WILL cause irreparable harm. This way, you can both get to the bottom of this and fix it correctly the first time. If you've had marriage counseling before, find a NEW counselor! I wish you both the best.

Answer 3

Start off by talking about it with her. Try to be calm. Try to find out why she won't have sex with you. Explain to her CALMLY why you need sex. You might want to resist the urge to say that you deserve sex and she should please you because you are her husband. Personally I believe that, but it is not the correct argument to make.

I went through this once. It was hell. I was constantly complaining about not getting any. At one point she said " you sound like you want a lover!"

One important step in recovering our sex life was to start over, from the very beginning. I began to treat her like a new girlfriend who I was trying to seduce. Although wehave always touched each other, I began to to give her massages, to turn her on with sexy scents, and clothes and music---and food.

The roots of your frustration and mine might be quite different. Maybe there are health issues-could be physical, emotinal, mental or a combination. If you love her you will take these items into consideration.

Before you go out and cheat on your wife take a look at the two sites I am going to put in the sources below.

The first one is a huge site and it will take a while to explore. The second is very superficial, but I think it will give you some ideas.

I hope the two of you are able to work this out. It is soooooooo much better to do it with the person you love and decided to spend the rest of your life with. Know what I mean?

Answer 4

No,no,no of course do not cheat! The first thing everyone on here will say is that you need to talk to her about it. Maybe she has depression. It doesn't have to be very obvious for her to be suffering. That dramatically reduces a woman's sex drive. Do you have kids? That can be stressful and tiresome as well. Do u two work a lot of hours? Maybe she's exhausted. Is it an age thing? Do u think she is being unfaithful to u? There's a lot to consider but u need to have a straightforward conversation about it. Don't come across as saying "You never have sex with me and I need some or I'm going to cheat!" Just tell her how much you love her and you miss sharing that part of your relationship with her. Ask her if it's something you have done (even if you're sure you haven't). Just be very sensitive and careful about how you present it. Cheating my be a quick fix for you, but you'll be cleaning up that mess for years!!!

Answer 5

Wow what a situation. Kinda weird that you havent figured it out but your wife don't need you to take care of business cause apparently some one else is. Cant believe you have let her slide for this long you must be a good man. Cheating is never the answer divorce her you will thank me later.

Answer 6

It depends on why her sex drive is so low. Could it be her hormones? How old is she? Women usually have their sexual peak around age 30.

If it is for emotional reasons that she doesn't have sex with you, then you'll have to work through those reasons.

Or if she's just holding out on sex to make you suffer for not doing the dishes...then there's your answer! ;-)

I wouldn't suggest taking a girlfriend. That will only stand to complicate things. If she's not interested in having intercourse with you but you guys fool around, will she give you a bl*w job? Would that be enough to satisfy your desires?

Answer 7

Spent more time with ur wife and do less outsider work mens earning money or friends etc.

change the location for some times go hillsstation and enjoy the life

then sex with wife ur wife enjoy that

Answer 8

Good thinking? Its always better to sort out the problems with your wife than to cheat. Its only a bandaid treatment. It amazes me how women can withold sex and expect everything to be OK. Most women who do this, then find out their husband cheats on them kicks up a stink and wonders how you could do such a thing. You just have to be straight up with her. Tell her you are frustrated and that you are thinking of finding someone else to have sex with. Maybe she doesnt realise how bad it is for you. Give her the opportunity to change things before you go out and cheat. Maybe counselling will help. Why has your wife lost interest in sex? These are all the things you need to find out. Just be honest with her, get into a real discussion about the lack of sex and maybe you will find the solution, just by her reaction. I know people will tell you that there is never a reason to cheat....and I kinda agree. I think you should leave instead of cheating. But I do believe in cause and effect. Maybe you need to remind your wife of that. Good luck.

Answer 9

there is a reason for everything under the sun.

she must have her reasons.

1) could she be getting it elsewhere?

2) is she frigid?

3) is she healthy. does she, could she have health issues you don't know about?

4) two years is a really long time to wait.

5) is she an actual woman. does she get a period?

must be tough beating it with a supply in bed.

let her know you can't take it anymore and you need to understand why she refuses.

indirectly, very discreetly let her know you will need to find something and how does she feel about your getting a supply elsewhere.

could she be mentally ill?

be careful!!

something is not right.

Answer 10

NO! i dont believe that any man should cheat, no matter what the reason. try talking to her about it first, tell her to be honest about it and you will too. she may have some insecurities about her body, so you need to be understanding. try telling her how beautiful and attractive she is, spoil her and surprise her, send her flowers out of the blue and come home from work early to take her to dinner. many times women loose intrest in intercourse because they no longer feel as though its making love, but rather being used for what they have because its there. Reignite that spark, find the reason you first fell in love and relax!!!

Answer 11

you need to spend that energy looking on finding out WHY she wont have sex with you. is it health issues going on. does she have a disease that she doesnt want to give you. there is a reason and you need to get to the bottom it. stop accepting the fooling around that is not doing the job for you. stop accepting her excuse for not wanting to do it. FIND out WHY and dont let up until you get to the bottom of it. maybe you both should try some counseling and seek a sex therapist. GodBless