telling his parents your pregnant?

Question

right complete first thing that pops into your head as a parent...i want as an answer to this please!

your son has got me pregnant, we've discussed this together and he has come to the conclusion that he will kill himself if i dont get an abortion, i want to keep the baby what can i do?

need your first initial thoughts if a girl told you that!

written in regards to what some of the people answered in my last question

Answer 1

I would talk to my son and get him some help if he was serious, has for you I would support you on keeping the baby.

Answer 2

I would grab my son, sit you both down and have a serious conversation with the two of you. Obviously since the deed is done it is pointless trying to discipline either of you. The responsibility is there, but I would still try and talk to you about the options. I am a pro choice person and that means you should have a choice of either keeping or not keeping the baby. If you are firm in your decision to keep the baby, then I would do whatever I can to help you out. The child will be the part of the family, no questions. My son won't have to marry you if he doesn't want to, but he will have to provide for the child to the best of his abilities (whatever they are).

Answer 3

I kinda had the same situation happen to me, but he wouldn't tell his parents at all because he didn't want the baby at all and he first lyed to me that he told them... and then I made him call them when I found out he lyed and it was the toughest thing for him to do. Wish I could say things got better, but it didn't. All I can say is if you do not want to do an abortion, do not do it. Even if you think you got yourself ok with that, it does stay with you and it takes a lot to get over it.

The best thing to do from my point of view is if he doesn't want to have anything to do with the baby, then let him go and raise this baby yourself with the help out your parents. Even if your parents are not supportive now, by time it comes time for the baby to be born... they will be happy about it! And for his parents, you can choose to tell them now or wait. Maybe after the baby is born he will come around more, but if he is threatening his life.. I don't know if I would want to tell his parents in fear of that happening. But in the same sense, they do deserve to know that they have a grandchild. So that is a tough call... I would end up telling them but maybe not right away so hopefully he gets better.

Stay strong and do what is best for you... that is the most important thing!!!

Answer 4

Well I am a parent, and for one I would give you a big cuddle and support you as you would be carrying my GRAND BABY...as for my "son" I would speak with him...and get him some therapy if need be.....I would then sit you both down and work out a game plan on supporting this baby. You both are young and at 16 the majority of teenagers have the "my life is over" thing when a big "moment" happens. Your doing the right thing in keeping this baby....your best advice is seek people who are older then your age group in big decisions as such. If you were to have an abortion...you would regret the possibilities, moments and love that this child would bring you and the world. Congrats sweety!

Answer 5

Honestly? Id say;

'Well to be fair - it took the 2 of you to get pregnant.'

I would then say to the son;

'Threatening to commit suicide to blackmail someone is wrong, and is completely irresponsible. Why do you feel an abortion is necessary?'

Then after adequate input, I would ask you;

'You would like to keep the baby, thats a very mature decision to make. Do you think that the both of you could make good parents, even if you weren't together anymore? Would access to the child for both parents be done academicably?'

I would offer support to both the parents to be, and hopefully be able to sort out where to go from there hun.

Answer 6

I would be horrified at any son of mine trying to manipulate someone like that. I'm not against abortion, but women should not be blackmailed into it.

All you can do is tell it to them straight! That you're pregnant and you've thought long and hard and you're keeping the baby. I wouldn't tell them their son's reaction, just leave them to let the news sink in, then take it from there.
I take it you would want them to be a part of the baby's life? You never know, maybe the father of your child will come round, in time-most men do (Eventually).

Good luck, and congratulations.

PS try not to let this worry you too much, you are carrying something precious and stress is not good!

Answer 7

First of all, you can't control what the father of you child will do. Do what YOU feel is best for the baby. If he won't sit down with you and his parents to tell them the news, then I would suggest writing them a letter explaining the situation to them, and maybe ask them to keep an eye on their son, and maybe suggesting that he may need some serious counceling. But please keep in mind you need to do what is best for the baby, it is not about you or him or his parents, there is another little soul that is sooo much more important.

Answer 8

I am assuming that you are very young, what a horrible situation you are in. This is what I would say:

(Name), I thought that you should know that I am pregnant and the baby is to your son. Please, let me finish, it is important that I finish. I have discussed this as rationally as possible with your son and I realise that there are options, but I have made the informed decission to keep the child. This will likely mean that I will have to do so without your son as he has threatened to end his life if I did not terminate. No doubt he will not do such a thing, but if he chooses to forgo responsibility for the child, that is his decission. He will still be required to pay child support for the child but I wont force him to play any part as a father or you as a grandparent.

Answer 9

Sometimes its better to review the person your child has for a future father!! If Killing himself is the answer to Your problem in his mind , maybe his idea of everything else is as poor. Choices for responsibilty can not be forced on one who refuses to accept them . It appears your more mature attitude is the shinning light in front of his dull acceptance..
This is about you and the "child" not his well being.
Here is a better way to break it to the parent."I am pregnant. Your son is the biological father. I want this child and help from your son!"....this type of entrance is clearly a statement of the facts and does not overplay any dramatic stament by the father.

As a parent (father) i would say lets get together and start to work on this NOW!!!

AND since i had to do this in my own life in reverse. Let me say that it was as hard a thing as ever I have done..My life took 15years to correct itself and it still affects everything i do. ....E

Answer 10

i would have a serious talk with my son if I heard that. I would be upset if he's too young to be having a baby, but I would tell both of you that I would support you two. I'm completely against abortion and would make sure my son knows that.