WOW!!! What a contoversial qeustion, you actually have a case here against both women and men. Man you deseve a star. I'm going to be the first to do it. Damn this is a good qeustion, and although everyone has there...reasons or opinioins, I disagree on both sides.
Men, you shouldn't divorce your wife cuz she's fat...MAke her feel good about herself...Like ya did when ya guys first met...seroiusly. Tell your wife she looks good, or tell she looks bad and that you miss her once was body, I garuntee she would work out just to hear you say that compliment over and over again. Trust me.
Women, you seroiusly need to stop using the excuse of taking care of the family. It has nothing to do with your health. It's your body, your choice between a snack food, or eating alot. Instead limit yorself. You know better then that. I know birthing children, the gravity BS, and taking care of the kids and the home environment. Choose the right foods and you won't become fat....simple as that.
Well. that being said, I'm out. Good luck to all of you....!
2007-11-05 23:37:50
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answer #1
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answered by Ripsi W 2
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I don't think its offensive. I think its a wise idea. After all, a marriage is supposed to be about two people who care about one another as people, so if weight gain makes a husband not love his wife any longer there wasn't much to the marriage in the first place.
I recently wrote an article on this very thing.
Actually, what happens very often is a slim woman will marry some inconsiderate, selfish, man. After she lives with him for a while, takes care of the house, the kids, and often hold a job she gets so exhausted she eats in order to be able to have the energy to keep going - while he sacks out on the couch each evening.
As a result, she gains weight. Its the price she pays for being the one to do everything without any help and without any respect from the person she made the mistake of marrying.
Most people will tell you that if they think of the couples they know, it is the heavier of the two people who is the one who takes on all the burdens and responsibilities for the family.
So - as I said - I think its a good idea for the husband who doesn't think much of his wife to leave. Chances are she'll get slim again when she's not living with such a boar, people will lthink she's "on the prowl" because she's divorce, but - really - it will simply be that she is no longer so exhausted, stressed out, and miserable that her stress response makes her need extra calories.
2007-11-05 20:14:43
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answer #2
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answered by WhiteLilac1 6
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Well, marriage isn't just about sex. I can understand a lack of sexual attraction when a spouse gets fat. Women have that issue too when a man gets fat, but the offense is taken when a man is basically saying, "I only married you for the sex and if I'm not getting any or enjoying it like I used to, I'm leaving."
Are you emotionally void or what? Now, I know you could argue, "Men are not as emotional as women." but this is an untrue product of social conditioning and you're an idiot if you never questioned it.
That being said, if a spouse becomes overweight or obese and does nothing to change it. It's selfish and unhealthy. It shows that a person has no care for themself or their partner. This I could understand. Sure, there are some medical conditions that can have an effect on a persons weight, but that person should really consult a doctor or a specialist. A thyroid disorder is not an excuse to be a walrus. Of course, if we're talking about a 15 to 30 lb weight gain over the course of years, then that's nothing. As for baby weight, a woman who takes care of herself during and after pregnancy doesn't become overweight because of having children!
2007-11-05 14:09:20
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answer #3
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answered by some female 5
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I don't know of any woman, of any size who would even date somebody as self-centered and selfish as you. Spelling mistakes aside, you should try using a dictionary before using words. Unconditional means without condition. My husband and I love each other no matter what. Technically, I'm no more than about five pounds heavier than what I was when we married six years ago. However, I had also lost weight, gained some back, lost again, gained again. Actually, this year I gained about 34 pounds and my husband found me sexier than ever. The 34 pounds was the result of my pregnancy. I don't look the way I did a year ago, but my husband doesn't care. He loves me the person, not the body. I love him the person, not him the body.
That's unconditional love.
2007-11-05 14:12:27
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answer #4
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answered by Vegan_Mom 7
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Dude, because that isn't marriage.
Marriage is loving, respecting and caring for a person throughout their lifetime. Women are going to get pg and see their bodies change. Men are going to get older, weaker and lose hair. People have strokes, lose limbs, get chronic conditions that morph their bodies and a millions other things.
Marriage is committing to someone to continue to love and nurture them through all those changes. If weight gain is enough to end a relationship for you, then don't get married because you don't have what it takes.
2007-11-05 16:56:35
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answer #5
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answered by Anonymous
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I think that women get offended, because it is hard to be rejected. I think women are more accepting if their spouses put on a few pounds.
It is sad but true that men doen't have unconditional love. If a woman gains weight her husband thinks he can treat her like crap. My husband doesn't love me any more. I am 5'4" I weighed 127 when we were married (15+years), now I weigh 134. He treats me like crap, because I am not as thin as I used to be.
2007-11-05 14:10:13
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answer #6
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answered by cashew 3
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Well, when you pop out a few kids, have gravity take it's toll... and yes, it will on you too, and plain and simple, age, then come back and ask this question.
No wonder you are single.
It's not always about looks, it's about a friendship, and a true relationship that goes so much deeper than outward apperances and once you meet that special someone in your life you won't have to ask.
And any man that wants a divorce over his wife gaining weight after she has given life to his children and had things happen to her body that not one man will ever understand should never have gotten married in the first place. He is too apperance oriented to understand the true meaning of love and commitment
2007-11-05 14:08:40
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answer #7
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answered by Lindsay G 4
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You love a woman for who she is. If she has gotten fat, it shows that her personality has altered. That is to say she has lost her pride in appearance and consideration for her health. If her personality has altered, she is not the woman you love. Your love vanishes with the old woman.
Women are generally insecure and like to blame outside influences rather than admit that they are to blame for their similarities to the Michelin Man. If it's an outside influence, then they have no control and feel hard done by.
btw. it does cut both ways.
2007-11-05 14:16:53
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answer #8
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answered by Anonymous
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You are confusing Fat and Love.
FAT and LOVE are two different things.
Fat is usually something that prevents initial physical attraction (and love) from happening. If I saw a fat guy I wouldn't want to date him!!!
LOVE is completely different. I fell in love with a man (who is thin and attractive). BUT now that we are married and IN LOVE his appearance is not so important.
For example, if my husband were to become horribly burned due to a car accident - my love for him would not change at all. If he were to become obese, my love for him would not change at all (I would be more worried about his health).
Maybe you haven't experienced true love in your life - but it is so wonderful that I do hope you are able to one day experience it.
To answer your question, men who state that they want to divorce their wives because their wife became fat are only using that as an excuse. The REAL reason has to do with incompatibility (i.e, fighting, etc..) and not her weight gain.
SO, it is offensive because it is an excuse which degrades the woman in the relationship.
2007-11-05 14:17:53
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answer #9
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answered by Dina K 5
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First of all if a guy divorces his wife cause she got fat then he is really selfish and shallow! How about if the man gets fat or starts losing his hair? I am all about health too but I would like to think that if I ever got hurt to where I could no longer get around and exercise and became fat my hubby would still love me. If you love someone based on their body then it wasn't love it was lust!
2007-11-05 14:08:36
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answer #10
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answered by bella s 3
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