Is it ok for domestic violence to be switched over?

Question

I have been married almost 3 years now. When my wife gets mad, she tries to fight me. She throws things and hits me in the face. The first three times, I just restrained her. The past two times, I hit her back (not with fists ) but with open handed. Last night she busted my nose and threw a radio at me. As a result, my nose was bleeding and my arm has a huge bruise on it. The catch is that she is now almost 5 months pregnant. What do I do? I love her and I want to do whats best for the child but Im not going to sit there and be hit on. I dont believe in hitting a woman so why are women allowed to hit men?

Answer 1

get proof and get help for it, and dont fight back, cause you will be in more sh!t, it sucks and shes got rage issues all you can do is back up your story and get help.

Answer 2

You better get your wife into an anger management course ASAP. My brother had the same problem with his ex-wife. When she finally moved out it was during an argument. My brother pushed her to the side so he could block her hits and get himself out the door. My brother ended up being charged for battery and had to go to anger management classes. In court the truth was brought out about him getting hit in the face with a full beer can as well as the abuse she had done to him so he didn't end up going to jail. Violence is not OK for men or women in a relationship. I was raised that a man should not hit a woman but if anyone hits anyone then you should be prepared to get hit back. The next time she starts hitting maybe you should call the cops on her. She needs to know that she can't get away with it pregnant or not. It also is not good for your unborn child to be exposed to these situations so she needs help fast. If it looks like an argument is going to get heated maybe you should for your own protection leave the scene and call her from a friend's house or your cell. Tell her you will come back to discuss the matter when she calms down and can discuss it like an adult instead of a wrestler. Men should not have to tolerate physical abuse any more than women. So get her into anger management and maybe some marriage counseling for both of you would help. If you don't take steps to end this abuse it will not get better. I wish you all the best.

Answer 3

women aren't allowed to hit men either, it's assault, just the same. You do not have to put up with this. I would agree, that you should report it...it is domestic abuse. She needs to see the severity of it, and reporting it may get her going in the right direction for getting her the help she needs to change this.
Was she always like this? Or did this begin with the pregnancy? It is common for some women to become out of control with all the raging hormones during pregnancy, and if this is her case, maybe she should talk to her OB/GYN about her rages. ...Not making excuses for her, just saying that maybe she needs some help with that.
It's dangerous and unhealthy for the baby too. They can feel and hear the emotions of the mother, and this can negatively effect the baby. Maybe you should sit her down and try talking to her, telling her that you are just not going to put up with this anymore. You are a human being, and you deserve respect, and the have the right to live in your home without being abused. Tell her that if she doesn't get some help with her anger, that you will be calling the police next time it happens, to make a domestic violence report, and your injuries will be photographed for future reference, and she could possibly be arrested......I'm sure this is not what she would want to happen. Tell her you love her, and you want to support her & help her, but you don't deserve this. Tell her, If it continues, you are going to leave until she gets help. It's kinda harsh, but this is what women do when they are in these situations. They have shelters for battered women, but did you know that you are welcome in those places too? Sometimes a little "shock" therapy on your part is all it takes to wake someone up to the situation. Besides, taking action now will provide a better environment for your new baby. You don't want your baby raised around this. Good luck, and I'm sorry this is happening to you. Thank you for not hitting her back, anymore. That is not going to help, only escalate the problem.

Answer 4

They aren't !!! Men can be Victims of Domestic Violence too !! Most are just too embarrassed to talk about it. You may need to just call the police. It may take a jolt like that to make her stop hitting you. Don't hit her back, just call the police. They are going to take away the one without the blood and bruises (usually- depending on the officer, state, etc..) But NO , you shouldn't have to put up with her abuse. Sounds like she needs professional counseling Fast !!! She should have gotten a long time ago. Good Luck !!

Answer 5

What a tough position to be in! I agree with most of the people who have responded here--domestic violence is not OK, no matter who is hitting whom. But the pregnancy thing....geesh! If it was me maybe I'd put up with it until the birth, calling the police every time I was attacked. Then I'd take the child and get out. Do you really want someone who's that volatile to raise your child?

Answer 6

OMG, you need to get her to therapy, quick. If you can't afford it, talk with her about this, and actively try to take different approaches when the two of you get angry. Now that you've hit her back, you've fed into her need for physical violence. She doesn't have to feel guilt about hitting you because you hit her back and now giving her a reason. Doesn't make sense but that's what goes on in her mind. Don't hit her again, especially because she is pregnant with your child. She starts going off in a rage, try leaving the house for awhile. I'm so sorry, I'm scared for you and your child. You might just have to call the cops one time and see if that doesn't straighten her up, but she definately needs counseling. You don't want her to be abusive towards your child.

Answer 7

They are not, and you can call the police on her just like she could on her, why is it you think women are allowed to hit men? you just haven't known the facts have you? no one is allowed to legally hit another person . You want to file charges against her call the police but be prepared for them to take her to jail and for you to leave her. she needs anger management classes. I know it is hard but you two need not to be having a baby/ you two don't sound like you get along well enough to be together in a marriage much less bring a kid into this marriage, what is up with you two? you need help both of you. can you get her to go to marriage counseling? good luck.

Answer 8

You should call 911 and report the abuse each and every time that it occurs. By no means, absolutely do NOT restrain her in any way or hit back. Do not touch her...remove yourself from the scene. Call for help. Any abuse must be reported and documented, otherwise you are on the losing end. Know that domestic violence almost always gets worse, before it gets better. You are your only advocate in a situation where no one else knows. Help yourself.

Answer 9

Who told you that women are allowed to hit men. Domestic violence is violence whether it be man or woman. I think you both need to seek counseling. It doesn't matter whether you hit her with fists or open hand you still hit her. You both need counseling, if she is that violent towards you, how do you think she will handle a newborn constantly crying. You need to act fast, if not your baby is at risk for violence or being placed in foster care once it is born. You both need to seek counseling fast, if she doesn't go, then you need to go and tell them everything.

Answer 10

Domestic Violence in any form is never OK.

Get a restraining order and control of the situation.

Answer 11

People are not allowed to hit anyone. Your marriage is unhealthy and I think it is well past the time to get out. You don't deserve to be hit on and she doesn't either. Your child will be healthier and happier without the two of you together.