Is it more of a sin to live with someone or to marry someone younger than you?

Question

My daughter insists that it is not Christian-like to marry a younger man but she says it is ok to us to live together forever. She says that he can even but me a ring but no paper is gonna be coming along with it. My son tells me to just ignore her and dont stress over it. my daughter is 21 and my son is 23. What is your advice?

Answer 1

your daughter is full of crap the only sin is living with someone before marriage. Hence the phrase living in sin.... marriage is the way to go if your talking the most christian way to do things

Answer 2

I'm 40, married two years and never been happier(never married before either). We have our moments when we'd like to kill each other. But you ask what has this to do with me? My husband is three years younger than myself. We were engaged nearly three months before we met physically and married married six months after that virtually twelve months after our first five minute conversation. If you love him who cares, it's you and he who has to share your bed not your daughter. She may be in your shoes one day and how would she feel? No where in the bible does it say you can not marry a younger man but it does say it's a sin to live out of wedlock. So I think that answers your question if you want to look at it that way. Also you can look at it this way, is it better to marry the one you love or live unhappily alone. Or rather ask yourself this question not can I live with this man but rather can I live without him? No matter what your age, or his, you are both entitled to love and if that is with each other then all the best to you. And I hope those wedding bells ring long and loud and your daughter can see past her own prejudices. After all she has only just begun to live her life and you still have yours ahead of you. Listen to your son and live and love a long time. PS: Just read a few of the other responses and we are behind you all the way so go for it, girl, and when we next hear from you I hope it's to tell us you've set a wedding date.

Answer 3

I don't see anything wrong with marrying someone younger as long as the age difference isn't a generation apart. Men take longer to mature than women do, so I'd just make sure that the guy isn't still playing video games all day and takes the bus to work. The churches will always preach at people about living together before marriage, but it's just not realistic anymore. Times have changed. Your daughter is an adult and really needs to mind her own business because this is your life, not hers.

Answer 4

Well, the key word is "Your daughter" Not you or god feels this way. Your daughter is only telling you these things because she doesn't want you to marry anyone other then her father. People will tell you anything to convenience you to either do something, or not do something that they don't approve of (Including family). I understand you love your daughter, but you really do not need her approval before you make a choice that will affect your life. You're a grown woman, and the only thing she needs to do is be happy for you regardless of who you decide to settle down with. She doesn't have to like him, she's not going to be the one living with him, but she does need to step back out of your personal affairs, and let you do what you want to do. And I would advise you tell her to take a back seat, and let you take the wheel to your destiny.

If she sees something in the man that could lead to future problems, ask her to explain those things too you. Because sometimes we're so tangled up in love that we fail to see what someone on the outside looking in sees. And even then be very careful, because she could use that as a tool (finding any little thing she can) to discourage your possible future marriage. And some times, people just don't want to see you happy with someone if they themselves aren't (Not saying that's the case, but that's always a possibility).

If you feel you current lover will make a good husband, then by all means, god bless you two and I wish you the best. But if you feel there may be some problems, and you're letting your daughters comments be a road block in your decision, then you may need to do some soul searching.

Next time your daughter says that, ask her to show you where it says that in the bible so you can see it for yourself. Because I read the bible and honestly, I can't see anywhere that is says age is a factor in holy matrimony. It says you are to celebrate and rejoice in the joining of man and woman (not younger man and older woman). And even if it does (Which I seriously doubt it) Do what feels good to you. You have to live your life for yourself, not for your daughter. What ever mistakes in life you make you have to answer for those when you and god meet face to face. And if he can forgive you, your daughter should be able to also.

I can't stand it when people take the teaching in the bible and twist it to say what they want it to say, or believe it should say. My father does that when he knows he's wrong, using it as a tool to prove his point. Remember that when most people quote the bible, they have no idea what they're talking about. The devil can quote the bible word for word, but does it make him right?

Answer 5

If you are referring to the Biblical sense, it is a sin to have sex with anyone before marriage regardless of what your ages are!! Your daughter clearly does not know what she is talking about, and most likely is a hypocrite in saying anything to you about this in the first place - is SHE still a virgin or did she save herself for the man she married?

Listen to your HEART - if you truly love and honor this man, AGE means nothing. My Mother is 72, her almost live in boyfriend is 57!!! I have been good friends with her honey for 30 years! What matters to ME, is my Mothers HAPPINESS - she deserves it after years of being unhappy being married to my Father!!!

May I speak honestly? I think your daughter may be just a bit jealous.... LIVE your life and be HAPPY - go for it Mom!!

Answer 6

It is more of a sin to live together. How much older then your daughter is the older man. If he is about 10 years older then it could be a worry.
Your daughter will eventually realise she is wrong and realise in a big way but it might take a while.

Answer 7

i dont believe the bible says you have to be within a certain age frame from your spouse before you marry but i know it does talk about sexual immorality so you need to live your life and just thank your daughter for advice but that just it its only advice its not written is stone and you will be the one too pay the ultimate price in the end so do what you think is right

Answer 8

Pardon me, but your daughter is full of crap. I do not know of any Christians who preach that line of bull. And I attend a bible church too. It sounds like she is trying to control your life.

If you read your bible, you will see many examples of older men or women in marriage to younger people. Evidently she has not read the bible or is only trying to control your choice for some reason. Maybe she is worried for your heart, or for her share of any inheritance going to your new husband should you pass away first. Kids do think of that stuff, you know. Good luck, but I would say listen to your heart. Marry the guy if you both want. Talk to your daughter and find out why she does not want you to marry him. Best of luck and God bless.

Answer 9

Listen to your SON !!!! Your daughter sounds a little "out there" ! What kind of "christian" is she??? And since when does the Bible quote age differences??? Odd !! Do what ever it is you want. Follow your Heart and Be Happy !!! Good Luck !!!!

Answer 10

Gee, finding true love is very hard in itself, and even tougher when we have to find people who are born exactly the same day, hour and minute, otherwise, one of both parties will be younger, that is guaranteed.

Don't stress over it, as far as I am aware, looking at your children's ages, I asume you are over 21, live your life.