Do you look down upon married people who don't flirt outside their marriage?

Question

Can flirting outside a marriage spice up the married life of a couple?

Do you look down upon people who don't do it?

Answer 1

How could I possibly NOT look down on those who DO flirt outside their marriage!!

This question should have been posed in reverse. Those who flirt within their marriages have a much higher incidence of "spice" and a much closer bond.

When a married couple take the time nurture the romantic spectrum of a marriage, they become closer, more intimate, and establish a light, close and very vibrant sexual life. A vibrant sexual life with your partner only draws each person closer to his/her spouse.

When a married individual begins to flirt outside of a marriage, only disaster can result. When a married individual begins to flirt and behave in innapropriate manners with people who are attractive to them, in times of trouble that individual can find him/herself in a very tight spot.

Every marriage goes through stages. Some of these stages are not very positive. When trouble comes those who are most bonded and intimately close will survive to continue on building the type of bond which lasts a lifetime and is satifying and fullfilling, as well as a true companionship which has no equal.

Children grow up and leave home, and if a couple has not attended to the romantic aspects of their relationship they will soon find that they empty nest is empty of far more than children. They will find they have little in common any longer, that there is a huge chism between them, one which may have grown so wide it is unsurmountable. It is not just a coincident that empty nesters find themselves divorcing at ever higher rates. Men may be able to find themselves a nice little girl who can warm their beds at night, but not provide any degree of emotional, intellectual, or level of maturity which is what truly forms a basis for a long term and happy relationship. While a hard firm young body may be satisfying in the short run, the huge differences cause far more difficulty than allows for a true partnership, companionship and satisfaction that one of your age group peers can provide. Women find it much more difficult than do men to find a new companion at such a late stage in life. This is a tragidy which is totally avoidable if two married individuals keep their attention reserved for each other, rather than showering that attention on relative stranges. coworkers, or others.

I try to not judge others as I know how difficult life is and how easy it is to make mistakes with great consequences which follows throughout life. However, with that said, I do find myself looking down on those who would flirt outside of their marriages, and of those who know another is married and yet still chooses to flirt with that married individual.

In this country, there still exists a law in many states which allows a spouse to sue an individual for messing with their husband or wife. It is called "Alienation of affection". One woman sued successfully even though she knew she would most likely not be able to receive the hundreds of thousands of dollars the jury awarded her, from the woman who had an affair with her husband, which would up causing a divorce. Personally, I am unsure how I view such suits, as I feel the spouse is more responsible for his/her actions than the one they have an affair with. However, I am pleased to some degree that there are laws which reflect the immoral and unethical practice of flirting and having affairs with married individuals.

On the contrary, flirting outside of marriage is very unhealthy at the least and extremely dangerous and damaging at the most. How could one trust a spouse who is constantly flirting and caring on with somebody else?

Marriage is based on trust. Flirting with individuals who are not your spouse is not trustworthy behavior. Once trust begins to erode, the marriage soon follows. Simple as that. How does an eroded marriage "spice" anything up other than fights and discord, hurt and divorce?

Answer 2

This is a leading question. To think that if someone DOESN'T flirt they should be ostracized is a new concept to me. Most people see marriage as an exclusive union between two people. Flirting is not cheating in the strictest sense but it is it's kissing cousin. Perhaps your point is if someone else finds your mate attractive it re energizes your own desires. What this fails to factor in is the person who is being flirted at. Are they going to think it is so innocent or are they going to take it as a come on? I think it is a highly dangerous practice that can easily backfire. There are plenty of other ways to spice up a marriage and I would say flirting with with other people is not one of them.

Answer 3

No, why would you look down on a married couple who respect each other and don't flirt with other people??? Flirting doesn't spice up the married life...it causes fights.

Answer 4

Only if you are judging how others wish to live their life. I actually believe that the ones who don't flirt are quite content in their marriage and don't feel the need for any extra thrill.

Answer 5

I don't think flirting outside of the marriage is healthy, I don't do it, I would never do that to my husband, it shows a lack of respect for the vows I took, to keep myself only unto him.

Answer 6

i don't normally do it, but i know people who do. when there's a problem is when you set out to do it. like that's what's on your mind to do. if it just falls in your hands and that's the way it comes out that's another thing. if you do it on purpose than your just a big flirt. what goes with that?

Answer 7

Well...since I, myself am a big flirt, and do not like to pass judgements on anyone, would certainly hope that I would "not" look down on anyone for doing this. I think that simply flirty keeps life spicey and makes things interesting. I doubt that I would look down on anyone for doing this. I believe that it is one of life's simple pleasures.

Answer 8

I look down on people who do flirt outside their marraige, it's disrespectful to your spouse... you should be flirting w/ your spouse, noone else! forsaking all others was the vow... !

Answer 9

I wouldn't care, but if they are married then I thin they shouldn't be flirting.

I'm not married but I have been in a long term relationship for almost 3 years, and I don't flirt with other guys. My partner doesn't flirt with other girls either, but maybe because he doesn't hang out with many girls, they are all my friends too. :P

Still, different strokes for different folks. I wouldn't really mind if he flirted, its just meaningless banter. I wouldn't LIKE it though, I just wouldn't care.

Answer 10

I think flirting whether you're married or just dating someone is healthy. However, it depends if the person flirting goes over the line. Depending on the individual's comfort zone, I would think they know where to draw that line.