I've been divorced now for a year and I want to go out and date, but I can't. I either think about my ex or just can't let anyone close. How can I drop the barrier?
2007-11-03 17:48:36 · 7 answers · asked by lilovin1212 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
listen, you need to stop focusing on who your looking for and you need some me time. you need to get down to your own life, finish school if you already haven't, take up classes of your hobbies, go dancing to dance, not to find men, look your best and feel your best, when you have your own life down, that's when you can build a solid relationship. don't go looking for men, make them look for you. you are a young woman and probably very beautiful, you don't need a man to define who you are or to make you feel better, you can do that all on your own.
2007-11-03 17:55:29 · answer #1 · answered by libyan_dindin45 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh Lord, I've been divorced twice (never again, though)...Don't let thoughts of your ex mess up your own life. Many women need self-esteem boosters to get them going again....get a funky new haircut/clothes, get a new hobby, volunteer at something you like to do, join a knitting group, whatever. It's really hard for us sometimes to accept the fact that it's over.
I did my own kind of 'ceremony' to let go of the past. I went to a restaurant with a friend, ordered a beer, and I thought, "After I drink this beer, my life with my ex is OFFICIALLY over. I will not think about him, talk about him, or pore over our married artifacts." I drank that beer and let him go for good. It helped me to finalize things, in a funny kind of way.
Don't worry about dating, you need to work on you first anyway, and be your own best buddy!
;0)
2007-11-04 02:07:37 · answer #2 · answered by Amanda C 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is so difficult to move on after all the emotional roller coaster you have been through, however you must realize at some point you must get off the ride and move on.
It will take all your strength and mental discipline to block your mind of him but it must be done. Set aside one day to totally remove him from your every fiber of your being. On that day curse him as much as you wish, cry as much as you want until you have fully exhausted all emotions towards him.
Then tell yourself this is the last day I will cry because of him and then move from there. With determination you shall persevere. Good luck.
2007-11-04 00:56:40 · answer #3 · answered by Jake 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Perhaps if you NOT think about moving on to another. But rather simply enjoy yourself with others. Time has nothing to do with appreciating and enjoying YOU! Stop using your x as an excuse to stop enjoying life. Divorce is NOT the end of life........but rather the Beginning!
2007-11-04 00:55:45 · answer #4 · answered by iyamacog 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's just my opinion, but it sounds like you're too worried about what others think if you start living your own life. Life's like a movie, write your own ending.
2007-11-04 01:20:01 · answer #5 · answered by oldschoolelf 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need more time,your just not ready yet,enjoy your freedom now,date later
2007-11-04 01:11:14 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
you not ready, you'll know when you are...... right now all your worried about is what he did to you.....
I waited 2 years before I even went out with friends..... it's hard to recover from divorce........
Good luck
2007-11-04 00:52:40 · answer #7 · answered by bizzymom38 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋