My husband and I have been separated 7 months now, because he had and a drug and alcohol problem. He has now been sober for 4 months. We have been talking and wanting to work out the rest of our problems. All the rest of our problems are things from the past that continually get brought up. Do you thing we can get past it with counseling? Or is our relationship too torn? Please help I love him more than anything.
2007-11-03 05:39:25 · 10 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You can survive this if your both willing to cooperate and find ways to get over these problems. Counselling is a must bringing up past issues means you never resolved them to begin with and you or him still have issues with them. Marriage is like this ups and downs if he is being honest and he has been sober for 4 months great but really is he in a support group like AA or has he been through rehab unless he has these support groups and you get back together he will just start up again. Stress and anxiety and other problems some people use drugs and alcohol to escape these issues. Unless he can show you he is in some form of
structured support group and going weekly I would say until he does this that you feel it not time to work on other things.
If he had these problems before he met you he needs to get a control and handle on these things before working on the marriage.
God Bless and Best Wishes.
Most anything can be salvaged it all comes down to the hard work and willpower to make it happen.
2007-11-03 05:55:12 · answer #1 · answered by Livinrawguy 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
He's obviously working on his problem, and the 2 of you need to fix the marital problems the drugs & alcohol brought to you. Get with a good therapist that specializes in marriage coulselling and is experienced w/addiction too.
Yes there will be hurtful things from the past dug up, but the therapist will work with you do get past those things and have closure. Then you 2 can heal and move on. It took a lone time to get to this point, it will take a while to fix. Good luck!
2007-11-03 05:58:47 · answer #2 · answered by Outta Control 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Talk about the problems of the past...resolve them..and then never talk about them again. If you do it's like pouring salt on a wound and it will never work out. Your relationship does not sound too torn to be fixed. If you two both want it too work then go to a church and find a priest or family counseler there. Good luck!
2007-11-03 06:52:25 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Love can conquer Many things . Go to counseling. At least you can try, and if for some reasons things don't work out, you won't beat yourself up later for not trying your very best to make things work. Good Luck !!!
2007-11-03 06:23:51 · answer #4 · answered by casper 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Absolutely! If both you and your husband are committed to making your marriage work and fixing your problems....counseling is a great idea to talk about your past problems....Hang in there with your husband...I am rooting for you!!
2007-11-03 05:46:57 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think that you could work out your problems if both of you are willing too. If he is willing to go to counseling that is a good thing
2007-11-03 05:48:41 · answer #6 · answered by thegirl 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think your relationship has a real chance - but don't let him move back in yet. AA says one year. And there are reasons for that - and lots of experience to back it up. Keep doing the work, be supportive of his efforts, but don't rush a reconciliation.
2007-11-03 05:47:35 · answer #7 · answered by banana6464 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
yes if the love is there and you are both willing to work at it then it should work. Be honest with each other and say what you feel.
2007-11-03 05:57:09 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'd say that you two are/or should be strugling through these hard times together and turning them into life bonding experience that'll keep you two together if you are committed to trying hard. keep at it and you'll overcome anything
2007-11-03 05:49:05 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
the damage is already done! love him from afar!
2007-11-03 09:44:13 · answer #10 · answered by gurlynmgurl 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋