I'm asking out of curiousity. Please answer. When you got married did you. .. ?

Question

Hi there. I'm asking this question out of curiosity mostly. My fiance and I have been engaged for almost a year. Technically we've set a date, for 2009. We were planning on saving roughly between 5,000 and 10,000. Did you save money before you got married? What assets did you have to bring into your marriage? And How old were you when you got married? And if you don't mind telling, how many years have you been married? Please feel free to share any advice or if you just want to share your story.

Thank you for your answers. Have a wonderful day. And best of luck to you and your spouse.

I'm not talking 5-10,000 for the wedding but just to have for us. For our future. You see I'll still be in school and he'll go back to school. I'll be 20 when we get married.

Answer 1

I was a 22-year-old airline stewardess, and brought my latest paycheck to our marriage. My hubby was 26, and had saved enough to pay cash for a new car, and for a sewing machine for me (as a wedding present). We eloped on November 10, 1969 after being engaged for about four months. (I HIGHLY recommend eloping ... or at least a very small wedding. My sisters $pent thousand$ and lived on frayed nerves for months, but I'm just as married as they are ... saved tons of money, and only spent about 30 minutes being nervous about getting married!)

He had a good job with the USDA Soil Conservation Service, and I got a job as the secretary at the local high school. We transferred (because of his job) about 2 and a half years later and I didn't get a job there. Two years later, we moved (his job), and I got a job as a proofreader at the newspaper. Four years later, moved again (his job), and I got a job at the newspaper, then as a church secretary, then as an office manager at an insurance office, and now I'm semi-retired from being a self-employed balloon-twist entertainer. He retired almost two years ago, and immediately got a part-time job doing the same work he'd always done!

Some of our secrets for a long and happy marriage are:

Hug a lot - several times a day! Always kiss good-bye and hello.

Take "cuddle breaks" whenever one of you requests one ... that means lying down on a bed or sofa and JUST holding each other and enjoying the calm support and comfort of the other. We rarely talk, or talk only about very good things, happy memories, hopes and dreams. We like to cuddle for 5-10 minutes. If one or both of you start having sexual feelings, wait until the cuddle break is over ... go do other stuff for at an hour. If the desire is still there, then go for it. But a cuddle break is a non-sexual time for giving each other a feeling of closeness and comfort without the demands of sex. Especially important after a hard day of work, a big disappointment, getting stressed out, just needing "together" time, etc.

Never call each other bad names or dirty words. Never threaten to divorce in the heat of battle. Don't bring up old issues in a new disagreement ... stick to the current problem and its possible solution. If you can't hold your temper, leave the room to cool off. Never get physical in a fight.

Let your spouse catch/overhear you saying complimentary things about him/her to friends and relatives. Always look for, expect, and concentrate on the good things about your spouse.

When you are mad at your spouse, make yourself remember three good things about him/her (and it has to be three different things that you used the last time!).

Write each other little love notes and hide them for the other to find (in pockets, a book being read, penciled onto their calendar, in a suitcase/briefcase, in their pill bottle, under their coffee mug, in the cookie jar ... get creative!).

Best wishes to the two of you!

Answer 2

Did we save money before we got married? No. We already had money saved. However, I worked a part-time job in the evenings, and used that money to pay for some of the things I wanted for the wedding that weren't in our budget.

What assets did we bring into our marriage? A home, a car that was paid off, investments, and cash. Oh, and each other.

How old we were when we got married? He was 30 and I was 35.

How many years have we been married? Five years and four days.

Advice for you: Never, ever let anyone or anything come between you and your husband and your marriage. Draw an invisible line around the two of you, and fiercely defend that boundary from intruders. You will be amazed at the people and things that will try to destroy your bound, whether intentional or accidental. Don't let it happen

Advice for you again: Never, ever, ever speak unkindly about your husband to another human, being not even your best friend. Remember that boundary? You must not cross it either.

Answer 3

I got married at the age of 30, been married for about 2 years now. We did not have a big wedding, we had a private wedding in Hawaii. It did NOT cost $5,000-$10,000. My husband and I agreed that is way too much money to spend on a wedding, instead we had a very small, private ceremony & our honeymoon in Hawaii. We decided to be smart & save the money to buy our first home. Now that I think about it.....it was a smart move.

Answer 4

LOL...My husband and I literally woke up one morning and decided to take the plunge THAT DAY! We went to file for the marriage license and when she asked us when we wanted to do it we asked if they could do it that day and she told us to come back in an hour and a half. LOL! We were already living together and had discussed our future and long terms goals as a couple. We did not have a substantial amount of money saved up and what we did have we did not want to spend on an elaborate wedding. We wanted to invest the $$ into our MARRIAGE and not a WEDDING. Ya know. It was both of our second marriages anyway! We are going to renew our vows in August 2008 anyway so then I can have the HUGE blowout. Besides I never wanted a fairytale wedding I wanted a fairytale marriage...and I have it. Best of luck to you and Congratulations on your engagement. OH...we have been together 10 years, married almost 7, I was 26 and my husband was 29 when we married.

Answer 5

My husband and I were engaged and had been together for over 5 years when we got married. We didn't have any money saved up because we got married much quicker than we expected. I found out at the end of December I was pregnant and we were married at the end of February. I was 22 and he was 23. We've been together now for 14 years...married for 8.

Answer 6

We only dated 5 weeks. We just "knew" so we got married, ceremony on the beach at sunrise over Lake Michigan with our friends, flowers, and a gallon of Ripple wine. We both had jobs. Started with a mattress on the floor, a card table and 4 chairs, one TV on a cart, and 2 cats. Kept clothes in boxes on the floor. Acquired furniture etc as we could. That was 41 yrs, 2 children, and 4 grandchild ago. Our advice... Mutual respect, good communication, be each others best friends, and make each other laugh.

Answer 7

I didn't bring any assets with me when I got married. I was 23 when I got married and he was 26. We've been married for almost 3 years but together 9 years and engaged for 2 years. Just remember to respect and support each other no matter what. Never ever go to bed angry and don't yell bad names at each other. Hope it helped, congrats and good luck!!

Answer 8

My wife and I have been married 41 years. we had a year long engagement and both of us saved money for the honeymoon. We only had one car and rented for the first 3 years. I was 23 and she was 22. we now have 5 children and 10 grandchildren

Answer 9

My first marriage, I knew him for 4 months before he proposed, (ya i know, big mistake) I got pregnant and a year later we were married. Married for 5 years had 2 kids and a miscarriage. Got divorced before our 6th year of marriage.

I met another guy and we just celebrated our 1 year anniversary last month.

Neither marriage I had assets, or money. But my first wedding was little and very cheap..

The 2nd wedding was a little better and still it was nice but cheap so we don't have financial problems were doing good.

Answer 10

No, we didn't save any money for our wedding. We went to Vegas and it cost $1000. (Including the airfare, hotel, license, wedding, food while we were there.)
Assets? We both had cars that were paid for. Other than that we didn't have anything.
We were 22 years old when we married.
We have now been married 7 1/2 years.