I am pregnant. I don't have enough money to raise a child nor have an abortion. I don't know what to do. I have read up on the assistance the government and my state can give me but it isn't enough. Once my mother-in-law finds out that I am pregnant, we will be kicked out. My husband can't find a job anywhere because no one is hiring. I am scared and I don't know what to do. A part of me(small part) knows I have to abort because I can't give the child the care that it needs and a huge part of me wants to keep the baby. I'm about 5 weeks along. What should I do?
2007-11-02 07:49:32 · 32 answers · asked by lady_aqua_moon 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
There is no way I can give up my baby for adoption. I'm already way too attached.
And we have been trying for two years to get jobs. All the mexicans keep taking them all.
2007-11-02 07:57:15 · update #1
Okay I was on birth control but I keep bleeding for an entire month so I was in the process of getting another kind when we had sex.
I am 20 years old. I have been on birth control since I was 11. I just got off of it because I was sick of the nausea and the lack of control it has over my period.
2007-11-02 07:59:48 · update #2
If your mother in law would kick you out, shes a freaking NAZI!!!
Its not like you two arent married!! Granted, she is paying for you, but its not like she cant expect that you might get pregnant!
You can carry this baby, and give it up for adoption..There are PLENTY of families that will pay all of your medical bills so that they can love your child. You do not HAVE to abort just cause you dont want the mother in law to "find out" Its no dirty little secret that you have sex with your husband right?
Oh, and im sure he can find a job, even fast food places will hire him...I dont believe that he cannot find one at ALL.
2007-11-02 07:54:45 · answer #1 · answered by MeL 4 · 4⤊ 0⤋
OK if you say she's your mother in law why would she kick you guys out? She should be glad to be having a grandchild. There are several different forms of assistance out there to help you. This time of year EVERYONE should be hiring, even if it is just seasonal and then after the holidays are over you both can start looking for new jobs. If you and your husband are ready for a child you need to get on birth control.
Don't use mexicans as your excuse that you can't find a job. You might not be trying hard enough. Fast food restaurants and gas stations are ALWAYS hiring
It's just so sad that people keep posting that they are thinking of an abortion.
2007-11-02 07:56:58 · answer #2 · answered by beautifulmommy 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you don't want to have an abortion - then DO NOT! It's not something you can take back once it's done and I think you would regret it forever.
You don't know what your mother in law will do until you tell her. So, don't make assumptions - this is her grandchild!
Go talk to social services and WIC - you would be amazed with how much they will help you if your husband isn't able to work right now.
There are no perfect times for anyone to have a baby if waiting for it to be financially "perfect" - babies come and people make it just fine. We have had weeks even with both of us working when it was tight, but we always had money for diapers and food and clothing and housing and vehicles and everything else somehow. Everyone goes through rough financial patches and you never know - he could end up with his dream job long before you have the baby! Don't dispair!
If worst came to worst and you were kicked out - social services would help you find a income based place to live. You might end up being a lot better off! You should look at all of your options before you even consider an abortion. I think you want to have this baby and if that is what you want in your heart - that is what you should do! You never know, this child could end up being the biggest blessing of your life!
I wasn't planned for, my father left my mother when she was pregnant and now I am helping my mother get through a very difficult time in her life - I don't know what she would do if she had chosen to abort me. Thank God she didn't! I am happily married and have her only grandchildren - she adores them! They're brilliant kids too - with huge futures ahead of them. They are my pride and joy! Even if I didn't have a penny, I wouldn't ever be able to give them up! Never!
Take some time - consider all of the options available to you and do the right thing - have this child! Best Wishes!
2007-11-02 08:02:00 · answer #3 · answered by Lamont 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
why would your mother in law kick you out just because your pregnant that isn't right at all!! What I would do is go to the welfare office in your town and apply for asst. it may not be enough but it's still something. Also I'm sure there are programs around that can help you find work it can't be that impossible. Try a McDonald's or something along those lines at least it's something. Good Luck with everything.
Also if it would be to hard for you to give the baby up for adoption how could you even think of abortion?
2007-11-02 08:00:40 · answer #4 · answered by Lovemykids 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you should keep the baby. if you really know that in 8 months you will still be struggling so much then give it up for adoption. why would your mother - in - law kick you out for being pregnant - she doesn't seem like a sweeet lady. you could try getting a job right now to help pay for things and keep the job after you give birth...and keep the kid and the job, just take maternity leave. you could move somewhere that is hiring ppl like your husband....
have you told your husband? he is a father, if you abort the baby, then you are also stopping him from being able to enjoy the child as well. does he want the baby or what? i think keep it.
2007-11-02 08:01:01 · answer #5 · answered by brown_eyed_carmelita 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honey, this is really up to you and your husband, but I agree with the others, consider adoption. I can't see how your mother-in-law would kick you out, what a jerk!
I would apply for government and state assistance anyway, just in case you decide to keep the baby. Medicaid is an excellent program that will pay the entire hospital and doctor bill. WIC is pretty cool too because it will help you with some groceries while pregnant, to be sure that you are getting the proper nutrition.
Good luck in whatever you decide!
2007-11-02 07:57:29 · answer #6 · answered by Brooke S 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I know how it is i lived in a place for three years and couldn't find a job and i was out everyday looking i finally had to move about an hour and a half away from all of my friends and family to finally get a job but as for the baby i think you need to go with how you feel if you want to keep it then keep it things seem to always work out in the end it may take a while but it will work. I hope one or both of you find something soon good luck.
2007-11-03 10:32:39 · answer #7 · answered by scooby93065 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you can do it. i had the same problem, my boyfriend couldnt get a job for 5 months. he got one a week ago thought thank god. we are due in 6 weeks. we didnt want a baby and i was on birth control, but things still happen. we couldnt afford an abortion either, they said it would cost us $800 dollars. the government is a bigger help than you may think. they will pay for daycare if you work or go to school. they will help you and your husband find work. they give you food stamps and show you places that have low income housing. they will help pay for you to go to school too. they give you money, they ggive you health care etc. the only thing im on right now is wic.
adoption is an option, we thought we would have to give the baby up. fortunatley for me my mom found out and sh showed me how to get all this help. and we decided to keep her, the baby despite the fact that he didnt have a job. just have faith. even little jobs like mcdonalds or gas stations are a start. it is much easier to get another job once you have one.
just a thought. i have faith you can keep the baby if you want to try. im 17 years old and im doing it.
2007-11-02 08:04:20 · answer #8 · answered by carolina sundance 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are to attached to give the baby up for adoption. To a family that would love and care for the child, but you will consider ending the baby's life by having an abortion????
There has got to be some kind of job that your husband can get. When I had my first son my husband and I had just moved so we could go back to college. When we moved we lost our health insurance. We had to go onto welfare assistance so I could see the doctor. Our plans had to totally change, but you do what you have to do. We finished up our semester at school and moved back to the city we came from so my husband and I could both go back to work.
I found work at a daycare that I could take my son to while I worked.
2007-11-02 08:44:05 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have you both put applications in EVERYWHERE? It's hard to imagine NOWHERE is hiring... Fast food is always looking for workers. Put pride aside and know you have to stick with this until the end. Abortion is murder. The baby gets their heartbeat at 5-6 weeks along.
If you absolutely cannot raise the child, there are couples who would be willing to pay for the prenatal care and adopt your child, because they themselves cannot conceive.
Best of luck. Think about keeping the baby. They are great!
2007-11-02 07:56:36 · answer #10 · answered by Danielle 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋