Is this normal my Husband says hes broke, but has alot of money saved he says that's for retirement, but I am

Question

21, and he is 25 so I am constantly borrowing money for my personal bills like loans phone bills, and so on, because he refuses to touch his savings?

I BORROW MONEY FROM MY MOTHER AND YES HE IS MY HUSBAND...

Answer 1

Why do you have personal bills if you are married?

Love and blessings Don

Answer 2

You shouldn't be dipping into savings to pay your everyday bills, such as phone etc. If you are constantly borrowing money to pay these everyday bills it's time to reduce expenses. If every month you can't pay your bills with you income, if you dipped into savings, it wouldn't be long until it was completely gone and then you'd be back to borrowing money.
You can reduce your expenses by going over what is absolutely necessary and what can you get by without? Can yo change your phone plan so it has less features and costs you less? Are there any subscriptions to magazines, newspapers, cable tv etc that you can cancel? Can you eat out less and cook from home more?
If you need to borrow money every month you'll just be digging yourself into a deeper hole. Right now may not be the time to add money to savings, but I would leave what is there alone so that it can be earning interest unless there is a significant loan that could be paid off that is costing more interest than the money is earning in the account.
It's always a good idea to save, and depleating it monthly is not going to solve your financial problems in the long run.

Answer 3

Don't ask him to take money out of his retirement accounts or savings. If money is withdrawn from a retirement plan such as a 401k or an IRA, there can be heavy tax penalites and it will severely impact your retirement. Say you needed $500 and took it from a retirement account. If you had left that money in there, in 30 years that could have grown into tens of thousands of dollars you could use to pay for living/medical expenses during old age when you are unable to work.

Pay a cell phone bill now or survive when you're older?

You both should be contributing or putting some money aside for retirement, regardless of your age. If you are not financially capable of putting money into a savings account and your employer does not have a retirement plan set up for you like a 401k, you should open an Individual Retirement Account when you have a little bit of cash. If your employer offers a plan, enroll with the minimum contribution.

I know how hard it is to save money, so even if its a couple years away, definitely start saving when you can. it will definitely benefit you in the end.

Answer 4

HIS savings? He gave that up when he said "I DO."

Your bills are his bills, and his bills are your bills. There is no more mine and yours when you get married.

If something (God forbid) should happen to one of you, the other one is responsible for the bills of the other.

That being said, you need to address the income and outflow money, and write up a budget. When you have it setup in a visual format, (an excel spreadsheet will work for this) with all your incomes and debts.. ALL the debts the household incurs, then you get with your husband and discuss it, business-like.

If you are constantly borrowing money, you will have to pay it back.. that is not good financial sense. If your husband wants to have a healthy relationship with you now, and a healthy retirement with you when you two are old enough, he needs to assist in making sure your credit is good, that all family bills are paid on time, and that you don't go further into debt by having to now pay a lender money that has been borrowed.

He needs to get enough out of savings to pay the bills, and put less into savings each pay period, to ensure that the bills and necessities can be paid.

He is not unreasonable to want to have a retirement fund started, but it is a rolling process, and not to put all the money you think you will need for your retirement into an account. What if you have children? How will they go to college if you cannot even pay your monthly bills?

Reason with him, don't whine or yell at him because he will not listen.... Just provide him with concrete evidence of the need to modify his resources.

Good luck.

Answer 5

It's not your husbands responsiblility to pay ALL of the bills including your own personal bills, it's your jobs to do it together so why don't you go out and get a job and stop borrowing from other people and help him pay some of the bills and leave his saving alone, he has it for retirement? Well when he retires and you both are out of a job, what money is going to support you both? Think about it!

Answer 6

Are you borrowing money from friends and family to pay your joint bills? Married couples don't have personal bills, Your assets are joint and your bills are joint. (If one of you stops paying, the other is responsible legally). He needs to learn this and agree to sit down and make a budget with you. List all of your monthly bills (including loan payments) and make a plan to pay for everything together. His pay check and your pay check should both be in the pot. Savings for retirement can be ONE CATEGORY of your budget, by the way. You both sound immature and not ready for marriage...but here you are, so get working on budgeting.

Answer 7

Is the money actually in a retirement plan? If so then no neither of you should touch that. But what do you mean by you are constantly borrowing money for your bills? Are you guys married or not? You should be paying these bills together.

Answer 8

He's being smart. He should never touch that money unless you're literally going hungry at night and are about to lose your house. It takes YEARS to invest. If he took money out, he could literally be throwing away what could turn into a million dollars or more by the time he's 65. Even people in debt can save for retirement. Don't ask him to take that money out.

The problems you're having at the moment need to be dealt with in another way. Are you spending money on things you don't need? Are you budgeting? If you make crappy money, try looking into another job or even getting a second one. There are ways to fix debt and "get by." Touching your retirement fund should NEVER be an option.

Answer 9

Maybe you should get a job, or a better job, and pay your own bills. Somebody has to save for retirement because the chance you will be able to live off of social security are going to be zero. It sounds like you married a responsible and smart guy that is trying to look out for your future. You should be glad he has money put aside and not be complaining because you can't have the money to text your friends all day.

Answer 10

Well, i am not married, but it does make sence that he is saving for retirement...Now at days, i think your parents should start as saving account for your retirement b4 u are bron, so it is not only easier to get started, but so we ahve a good example...HE is probably just investing in YOUR future TOGETHER. If you have that much trouble with your bill, try using only a cell phone, and maybe putting one of the bills in his name to make it easier on you. That would probably help...and no matter wht, YOU are NOT alone in financial issues, its really common, best wishes. Try to calm down about it, and "prioritis" it may make you feel better and put you mind to ease...

Answer 11

You are headed for divorce unless you straighten up.

You need to get your own job and learn to live within your own salary. The only time you should use a payday loan is for sudden emergencies (car repairs, doctor's visits, etc.). If you DO have payday loans on a constant basis, you need to borrow less each time you renew (go down $25 on the principal each time).

The only time he should touch his savings is to pay off your loans permanently and cut you off from that process.

Your husband is wise. Listen to him.