Is it unfair for family members to pressure someone into living (rather than suicide)?

Question

Is it unfair to condemn someone to 50 years of depression?
By using the hurt it will cause family and friends as a deterrent are we asking someone to suffer through life for our sakes? Is that fair?

Yes that is what I wanted to hear - doesn't mean I wont respect other opinions though.

Answer 1

I felt it unfair when I was deeply depressed. It's my life and I can do what ever I want to do with it, right? Well ... I didn't think about the fact that depression alters the view of life and that is not something that is natural. Cure the depression and your view of life will change. Does the family have a right to try to help their loved one to find a cure and get a better life? Yes, they do. It's not to "condemn someone to 50 years of depression", it's to fight for a loved one and try to help them get well.
Compare it to any other illness. Diabetes as an example. Should the family members just let the loved one die or should they help the loved one get help and medications (insulin) to make the life better?

Answer 2

My own strong conviction has always been that suicide is a tragic waste of life. Without trying to judge individual acts and the motives behind them, I support wholeheartedly the position that "suicide is a selfish act, for it inflicts enormous grief on the families of victims and weakens the entire community. It is wrong to think of self- destruction as an act of love or a generous effort to reconcile the family." Many argue that suicide has always been a culturally acceptable option -- an assertion that is by no means beyond dispute, in my opinion. But even if suicide were culturally approved in the past, this practice would still have to be judged in the light of the Gospel in the same way that headhunting expeditions and inter-clan warfare were. The Gospel is quite clear on the value and dignity of human life.

What can we do to remove some of the romanticism associated with suicide? We would have to proclaim in some visible way that suicide is not an honorable death, but one that needlessly subjects others to misery. In the Middle Ages the people in some European countries cut down the body and left it in the middle of the road to be trampled by all who passed by. We don't have to go this far, but we certainly shouldn't provide full burial honors for the victim either.

Answer 3

Nobody ever said that life is fair. Suicide is a massively selfish act unless it's committed to save another life - and that isn't how most suicides occur. It's also selfish to want someone to keep living because you don't want to lose them, but that is also what love is - you don't want to lose someone you love. It's not unfair for family members to want to keep their loved one alive. Depression is awful, but so is the pain of losing a loved one to suicide. If you must consider suicide, consider what Dorothy Parker had to say about it...
Razors pain you, rivers are damp
Acids stain you, drugs cause cramp
Guns ain't lawful, nooses give
Gas tastes awful - may as well live!

Answer 4

suicide is never good and allowing a family member or friend to go through with it is also not good..usually it is something that can be treated or a temp situation and you should be giving that person all the support they may need....now if you are speaking in terms of a medical illness that the person will have to life with that would take away there quality of living..that is a decision that must be made by the person who has the illness..and keep in mind they are comming up with medical breakthroughs every day..i would hate to see someone kill themselves then for a cure to be found soon after

Answer 5

I can only imagine the tremendous amount of pain a person must be suffering to actually overcome the instinct to survive and take their own life. I was seven-years-old when my mother was overcome by her pain of living. I forgive her. I think it is important to try to get help since depression is treatable these days. I know it is difficult to trust the medical industry, but it seems a reasonable alternative to making a decision you can never take back. Life is painful, but it is also unique and irreplaceable. Seek help, outside the family.

Answer 6

I don't think anyone has the right to tell you you cant commit suicide and must stay in this world because they will miss you if you die...that's soo unfair and basically its blackmail wrapped up in a caring bundle of guilt.
Id never tell you to go do it...but id never condemn you for doing what you needed to do.
help is out there...its crap..but its help of sorts.
depression is a Bytch..and I am her slave also! lol

Answer 7

They'd probably forgive the person for suicide, but not themselves. They would be condemned then.

Where there's life there is hope. Depression doesn't last 50 years, and in 50 years or 49 years there might even be an instant cure, or even in ten.

Answer 8

Many people live with depression and have productive and happy lives despite the depression.

Quality of life is relative. Now someone who cannot walk would probably choose fifty years of depression in order to walk.

Life is for living and yet from the moment we are born our dying process begins. This in itself is depressing but it is the fate we all share and we all have to deal with.

My suggestion to anyone contemplating that fifty years of depression is worth dying early for does not really understand the process of life and living.

Non of us live charmed lives. We all have something that makes life difficult, uncomfortable and even unbearable. Yet the human spirit within most of us keeps us motivated to carry on regardless of pain, blindness, quadriplegia, HIV, incurable degenerative diseases and cancer.

Find a reason to live and stop making much of depression. Most people suffer from depression today, its a fact of life.

Answer 9

You got me thinking. Not often that happens.
I dont believe life is good and the best option for everyone and if you dont want help then thats your choice.
However, no-one else must be involved. Like the guy who thought he might be infected with HIV so he parked on a level crossing and killed himself when the train hit the car, taking 5 people plus the train driver with him. Thats wrong.

Answer 10

Life is all about dealing with the adversity. To kill onself is not the "normal condition" of things.

It is better to work to resolve the cause of the depression, thus making life better, not ending it.

suicide is a cowards way out. All you do is hurt the people you left behind. It is very selfish and self serving.

A person should never be living their lives for others. They need to be right with themselves and live for themselves. Once they can do that, they will see that they gain great joy and pleasure from life by helping others moreso than helping themselves.