He swears he changed he in aa and i really do miss and love him. WE been together 16 yrs first 5 great last 10 awful he has been both physically and mentally abusive i thought i wanted freedom now i just missing security of marriage love him but afraid of him should i return?
2007-11-02 01:23:32 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Entertainment & Music ➔ Polls & Surveys
Heed the advice in the previous answers.. You do NOT deserve to be treated like that. Leave him and get a divorce. Things WILL only get worse if you go back to him. Save yourself and your kids!!
2007-11-02 02:15:18 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Not if he beat you and never felt remorse for it. If he did beat or even hit you then and got away with it he'll do it again. It's like an addiction to the power you posses over others. Men in general do thing unknown to themselves to get the rush of superiority. Hitting a woman makes some men feel great, and they'll seek to feel that way again the same way a drunkard needs a drink. Most men don't realize on a conscious level what they are doing, it's built deep within them. I'd say your lonely and seeing him in a diminutive role has you feeling sorry for him. Don't feel sorry for him, you didn't make him drink or become abusive. Just reading you comments on here I can tell your a bright, warm, lovely soul with a rare sense of humor. You could find someone to chase away the lonely without even trying. If you hate men right now, and I can understand, perhaps a community group where you meet new people and do new things would help.
2007-11-02 08:39:14 · answer #2 · answered by ROBERT C 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It Is not Good, the fact that you have "Actual Fear". I think that Is terrible. If "HE", loves you?, I mean like seriously. Then i feel He has to Get himself sorted out with "His Anger". Isn't there Anger management, he could go to for a few weeks?. Don't say there Isn't.
I don't think you can "Love someone, who makes "You Physically scared?, I mean, come on!!.
I think, after all those years there must b something "Rock Solid", In your relationship, no question about that. However, I think you will agree, It goes both ways. If he has this terrible anger?, and you are "Not In your Heart", the cause of It?.
Let him "Proof He really Loves you" By getting himself sorted out. Life doesn't last for ever you no?. You have already used "Quite, a Chunk of It", with all this Farting about?.
Get It sorted one way or another, and My Blessings to you both.
Tom777
2007-11-02 09:24:26 · answer #3 · answered by tom777gormley 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if he's in aa and is sincere about it and you feel that way-i would for sure go back that is-but you'll have to help him with this-they have help for spouses also-i cant remember the name of the thing but call someone in aa and the'll tell ya- alanon or something like that-ive seen some marriages saved in this manner that were worse than yours- takes time - you'll be able to tell if he is not sincere pretty fast-then i would get away from him
2007-11-02 11:55:35 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Only if you have no respect for yourself and no regard for your personal safety. You wasted 10 years with this guy. There are plenty of guys out there that know how to treat a woman. If you go back to him now you are just telling him that you want him to beat on you.
2007-11-02 09:14:00 · answer #5 · answered by RayCATNG 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Security is a silly reason to return to someone who is abusive. If you are afraid of someone you could never truly be happy with him.
2007-11-02 08:27:48 · answer #6 · answered by sprite 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Stay away from him....Has he done anything to prove to you that he has changed such as anger management classes and counseling, if not then stay away from him, my father used to say the same things to my mother and she believed him, things would be good for a few weeks then he would start abusing her again...she ended up divorcing him.
2007-11-02 08:38:36 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
NO - don't return to someone for security. Find someone who loves you for you...someone who loves you would never hurt you physically or emotionally.
2007-11-02 08:33:48 · answer #8 · answered by Queen of Beer 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no, abusive guys always say they'll change, but they rarely do. It might be fine for a while, but the abuse will return
2007-11-02 08:30:36 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
Never find another one
2007-11-02 10:39:01 · answer #10 · answered by sweetie29 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋