Read my poem, tell me what you think?

Question

Landing in Heaven

I woke up in the winter
With a feather in my hair
My feet were stiff and muddy
And my body cold and bare
Shocked at my surroundings
For yesterday 'twas spring
All the trees were blooming
Baby birds would chirp and sing
I'd danced among the flowers
Left my garmets in a pile
Soaking up the sunlight
Singing love songs all the while
I had glanced a feather
That was floating through the sky
I jumped and tried to catch it
But the feather was so high
I climbed up in a maple
'till my head broke through a cloud
I climbed my way to heaven
And i swear i gasped out loud
My hands lost grip and flailed out
And my heart beat twice it's pace
I fell down from those branches
And i've landed in this place.

By: K.M.P. "Cut Up Angel"

Answer 1

Pretty good pretty good, man.

Answer 2

Ok, I read it, now I'll tell you what I think.
It's a lovely poem. There are a couple places with small wobbles in the rhythm, but it is enjoyable reading, and that's what makes poetry work. I had a perfect image of a young lady chasing a wind blown feather in the nude, with no shame or thought about it, climbing and falling. You painted a scene with words, thank you for sharing.

Answer 3

to me it doesnt make Thaat much sense but then, not very many poems do..lol. Its pretty amazing though, i like the middle, it really puts the image in your mind....nice work :D

Answer 4

Did you really make this up?
Its great no matter where you got it from if from your head,,its really good.

Answer 5

it was ok but the last part didn't make sense. where did you end up? where you dreaming or still in heaven?

Answer 6

Its very pretty.... Good Work

Answer 7

Boring!!

Answer 8

I prefer your darker ones...it's not because I can't stand the light! x

Answer 9

it's good but not great

Answer 10

great! you can do better though.