Lesbians are stereotypically seen as "man haters", so why aren't gay men seen as women haters?

Answer 1

I believe it has to do with power dynamics. It is easier to rally people to violence if women are challenging male-advantaging systems. It serves a function. Likewise, it serves a function to preserve male-advantaging systems to equate gay men with women or to associate them in some way (the social construction of gay male femininity) because again, in this way, it is easier to rally people to violence against them. In this way, homophobia is linked to sexism, and preserving a system that advantages heterosexual males.

Note:
Troll shark, you've illustrated beautifully the social contradiction of how discrimination against disadvantaged groups justifies itself with faulty logic.

Answer 2

Because lesbians threaten straight men. The very concept of lesbianism leaves no role for them and I think we've all seen the hysterics that ensue when straight men think they've been left out of something. Personally, most of my closest friends are straight men, so the whole "man hater" thing doesn't really jive with me. I'm more of an "asshole hater".

Gay men aren't seen as "women haters" because, I think, women don't feel threatened by them. Compare this to the lesbians-as-man-haters issue: men have, in most respects in our society, historically been in control of everything. Lesbians threaten this in two respects: 1) they are women who 2) don't need men. Women, on the other hand, have not HISTORICALLY been in power (god willing, that will continue to change), so gay men don't really knock them down on the totem pole. Plus, they're gorgeous and funny and they take us to the prom when no one else will...what's not to love?

Answer 3

Because gay men are gay because they like being with men, and that has nothing to do with women.
Lesbians are lesbians because they're somehow disgusted with men. so they opt for women instead.

The central factor here is probably the penis. Gay men love 'em and lesbians have no use for them. In the homosexual world, the penis is the focal point, and the vagina is an afterthought. In the heterosexual world, at least in western cultures, the penis is secondary to the vagina.

Answer 4

Um, it may be that in popular culture, homosexual men are perceived as "gay", i.e. as light-hearted, frivolous, and rather vain and shallow. If one looks at literature by homosexual men, there is quite a bit of misogyny. But that's not the popular image.

My guess: straight male homophobia is such that homosexual men can only be acceptable by being portrayed as harmless, silly things who are only good for styling your hair or decorating your living room, rather than as being capable of having distinct opinions and attitudes.

Answer 5

Gay dudes tend to be into fashion, urban lifestyles, and left-wing politics. Many women are also into these things, so there's some common ground there.

Answer 6

Because gay men dont go around yapping about how much they hate women.

Answer 7

because gay people are not woman haters. plenty of them have woman friends they hang around with. I can't say the sames for lesbians though.

Answer 8

Oh no, I know a LOT of gay men who are woman haters. And they admit to it.

Answer 9

Well, there are quite a few lesbians who feel marginalized because of sexism, because of the fact that they're shunned by society for not fitting into a typical feminine stereotype, and because they're homosexual. I would imagine that they hate the system, not the individual men.

By the way, lesbians hate me and I'm a woman.

Answer 10

id hate if gay men were woman haters...i adore them...they are lovely and so sweet.