Hey, This guy who I volunteer with once a week sent me a message on facebook saying how much he likes me and wanting to know if I like him back. The problem is he's nice and all but he lives like 25 minutes away from me, he's in grade 10 and i'm only in grade 9 and we go to seperate schools, and I think of him as a friend. He wants me to message him back but I dont know how to tell him I dont like him without hurting his feelings or making it awkward because I have to be around him every week. Please help?
2007-11-01 11:07:26 · 46 answers · asked by Megan 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
the famous line us girls must remember.... i just want to be friends...i dont think of you that way....
2007-11-01 11:10:21 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
Now this is a touchy situation. It's going to be hard, but if you don't feel the same way, you can't lead him on. What I would do, is be very honest with him. I would say that "I like you as a friend, and at this point in time nothing more." You don't know that in a year or so, you won't like him. Just be honest with him. Tell him you like him as a friend. That's all you really can do. Tell him you want to stay friends and that this shouldn't interfere with your friendship. You don't want it to be awkward, so act the same way you would every other day as if he didn't send it. If he doesn't respond the same way, then he doesn't respect your feelings. Just tell him how you feel, and you can do no wrong. It may hurt him a little bit, but if you are friends, then this should not get in the way.
2007-11-01 11:15:49 · answer #2 · answered by finelineserenity 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Just explain to him that it would be too hard to have a relationship with someone who lives so far away. He will understand. And the grade 10 and 9 thing. There is like no difference bettween thoose grades. I know people in 11th grade who date freshmen. It's not a big deal.
2007-11-01 11:14:38 · answer #3 · answered by BlondeGrl 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Just be open and tell him you are only interested in being friends. Dont lead him on b/c that is mean..... email him and tell him this in a nice way and explain how you dont want this to change how you guys are friends- it may be a little wierd when you see him for the 1st time but eventually things will be normal again. GL!
2007-11-01 11:10:49 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Just tell him that you're not looking for a relationship right now, but that you're flattered. It wouldn't hurt (but may not help) to mention all of his positive attributes and that if you were looking for a relationship, that whoever it is you ended up with would have much of the same qualities. Let him know that the timing isn't right, and that you have too much going on right now to focus on a relationship at the moment.
Either that or you just straight up tell that fool, "Listen, you're just not my type. I think you're great, but just not in that way"
But there's really no "easy" way to let somebody down. All you can be honest, and continue to act the same way and hope that he respects your decision.
Good luck.
2007-11-01 11:13:01 · answer #5 · answered by allthree 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
It's better to just tell him the truth instead of stringing him along and letting him believe that there is hope. Just tell him that you like him as a friend, but not in the way that he likes you. If you are honest with him from the beginning, that will hurt his feelings a lot less.
2007-11-01 11:10:35 · answer #6 · answered by Holy Macaroni! 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Be honest. Many girls/women feel awkward telling a boy/man no. There's no "nice" way of doing it. Just be gentle. Also, feel free to use your parents as an excuse.
Use this:
"Hi, So-and-so!
I appreciate your email/post, but I'd prefer to be friends. Also, my parents won't/don't allow me to have boyfriends that are older/in a higher grade than me."
Any guy will tell you that although they are disappointed, it's worst to lead a guy on. Just tell him.
2007-11-01 11:13:06 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Tell him that you're flattered but that you see him more as a friend than anything else. Tell him straight up that you don't want things to be weird or change because you feel different about your "relationship" with him than he does. Believe me, he'll get over it. If he doesn't his loss, if he really does like you like he says than he'll accept your offer of just being friends. Good luck!
2007-11-01 11:42:41 · answer #8 · answered by mnkylvr2388 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Same thing happened to me i met this guy through my friend at a concert. We talked and then like a month later he asked me out. I politely told him that hes really sweet but i only see us a friends. He took it well we talk occasionally now. I thought it would be awkward after that but it wasn't.
Just be straightforward with him.
2007-11-01 12:14:16 · answer #9 · answered by Demi 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
it will be hard, theres no way around that. try to be as straight forward as possible.
or just say, "im sorry but, no. i just dont like you like that. i love you, but more like a brother. sorry, i hope we can still be friends."
its going to be hard no matter how you say it, and it wont be easy. but it has to be done. dont feel bad afterwards, its just the way life is. sometimes its easy and amazing, and at other times you may hit a bump in the road. you just have to be able to move on afterwards, no matter what ends up happening.
good luck!
2007-11-01 11:15:20 · answer #10 · answered by Amy 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Better to tell him sooner than later....so he won't end up feeling "strung along" and resent you for it later. Just be honest, and firm....tell him he is and always be ONLY a friend to you, and that you think your email conversations should come to an end.(Proven that email just leads to more and more intimacy, eventually....so cut it off...only see and/or talk to him when you have to, at the volunteer place.)
2007-11-01 11:13:31 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋